Maid of honor backed out 2 days before the wedding

I'm sorry you're going through this right before your wedding! There is already enough stress and jitters as it is...
Can I ask why she was your MOH in the first place if so easily replaceable?
I know I would be devastated if I lost my MOH... I couldn't imagine choosing someone else.

Why couldn't she make it to the rehearsal dinner? Did you ask her, or just get mad and demand she be there? There's also a strong possibility that she was venting when she said she wasn't going to the wedding either. I'd be devastated if I were her and you replaced me so quickly if you didn't take the time to ask me what was up. I'm sorry to say, but without know more details, I'm inclined to think perhaps you overreacted a bit.

Ok so I chose my brides maids 2 years ago, I didn’t have close friends at the time so I decided to use my fiancé’s little sister. If it were up to me I wouldn’t have anyone there but my fiancé has a lot of friends and family and wanted a big bridal party. Two weeks ago I confirmed with my bridal party and 1 other person couldn’t make it cause of school, that’s fine. The MOH confirmed she would be there and picked her meal. The day of I reached out to remind them. My fiancé texted her asking if she was going to be there. She said “ no I told mom I have work the next day I can’t go”... everyone had work the next day... then she got in a fight with F about not being there and then backed out of the wedding all together. If she had said “hey I can’t make it, I’m sorry!” It would have been fine. But she went as far saying she’s not coming to the wedding. Keep in mind I wasn’t in this conversation at all. Once I heard that I knew I had a really close friend that had a dress already and was ready to jump in at any moment. She told me this 6 months ago and tbh I would have chose her as a MOH but I met her a year after I chose everyone. She’s great. If I could post screen shots I would. She said “find a replacement! Have fun!” I did just that

My best friend had a similar situation occur! She was being polite to her fiance and family, and since she didn't have a sister, she asked her fiance's sister to be the MOH. She had her 3 closest friends as bridesmaids, but since they were not family, like I said, she was being polite. A week before the wedding. The "MOH" decided that she didn't want to be in the wedding anymore because she had just ended her relationship with her bf and thought it would be too difficult. Instead of telling anyone though, she just said she was no longer going. The fiance's family assumed that my friend and her had gotten into an arguement and blamed and SHAMED my friend!! My friend had reached out and the girl never would respond or give her the time of day. Really messed up.... So after panicking, I tols my friend that this is her day, and ahe deserves all the happiness. So, bumped up a BM to MOH and made a Junior bridesmaid. The family then tried to attack her for replacing her amd not talking to her. . . but she did try and the girl was not responding. At the wedding, some people were cold with her, but polite. Then 2 weeks after, the girl told them all why she didn't want to be in it. Instead of appologizing to my friend for harrassing her and being rude, they just comforted the sister and ingnored it all. The day was still beautiful, and at least in advance you know how the family is. . . so... For you, just know that this is your day, and you deserve it. 😘

View Quoted Comment *sigh* I totally get it. I didn’t do anything to this girl. She said something she was “joking” about, I took it seriously cause it is serious 2 days before the wedding and now I’m getting attacked for it

That really sucks that she did that!! However, why did you feel the need to replace your MOH two days before? If I were the replacement, I would probably be pretty offended and stressed. You should have tried to talk it through with your FSIL before replacing her so quickly. You also said she never "stepped up" which leads me to believe you have higher expectations than you are telling us.

View Quoted Comment My fiancé had higher expectations for them. He tried getting them to throw me a bachelorette party and they wouldn’t respond, he offered to pay and his sister still said no. His sister had a ton excuses. The new MOH is pumped. I’m with her getting my nails done now.

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Good! I would still try to salvage things with his sister, though. Especially because she is family and probably not going away. Good luck and enjoy your day!

View Quoted Comment He did what he should not have done, trying to push people into sma party when they did not initiate and volunteer. Let's face it, you chose someone you did not really want, for all the wrong reasons, and over 2 years, she probably has it figured out. Pushing with the parties, by FI, did not help. When someone declines to attend something like a rehearsal party, like any other situation, you say, I'm sorry you won't be there. It is not good manners to expect to be told why, or make judgments about whether or not her reason is good enough. It is unfortunate her brother got pushy. Also, that her mother did not pass on the message. But you and FI have not treated her well. I hate the way people use social media as a weapon. That is nasty. But neither you and FI, or his family, come out smelling like roses here.

View Quoted Comment I honestly did nothing to this girl. She made arrangements and last minute didn’t come but instead of saying sorry she said she’s not going To the wedding. If she just told us directly and didn’t have a toddler melt down it would have been fine. Her “joking” about the only day I truly needed her is completely ridiculous. I’m completely in the right covering my ass when she can’t commit. She’s 22 years old and needs to grow up.

View Quoted Comment Thank goodness his mother texted me apologizing! She said she’s sorry if she caused any stress, so I’m thinking we are getting over this situation pretty fast.