Maid of honor issues

Hi Tamia I completely understand how you feel because thos as happened to me. My oldest daughter and 1st granddaughter was a bridesmaid and maid of honor but then she had pulled out from roll and wedding. For financial reasons she said but I was like ok since this whole pandemic had put alot of us in a hardship. Including us we had moved the date back to October of this year. So I understood I was hurt at first but then I ok with it. So we moved on with planning months go by and six months later she randomly tells me that she will be my maid of honor again. I was tickled by what she said but I told her that the roll has been filled by someone else. So now she is a bridesmaid now so I told her how I felt and you should too. My 2 parties are in 2 months Srry for the long story she accepted a role in your wedding and her duties are to plan your bachelorette party. I will relieve her of her duties as asee if you track the other missing party and relieve her too. They are supposed to be there for you but obviously there other friend was more important. Tamia I hope it all works out for you

View Quoted Comment I’m sorry that happened to you it’s really frustrating when this stuff happens! I’m glad everything worked out for you. I’m definitely at the point of moving on beyond it. Instead of doing a bachelorette party with my bridesmaids I’m now doing a bachelorette party with my family and my fiancés family and I’m so much happier with that plan. My fiancé and I have also talked and are doing away with bridesmaids & groomsman as well. 3/5 of my bridesmaids were my sisters anyway! So I definitely feel much less stressed and worried about whether or not my MOH is going to decide to show up or not.

View Quoted Comment I'm so happy that it all work out for you as you well

Once you involve other people, the day is no longer just about the wedding couple. Then you have to consider the guest's feelings and needs. So it's not longer just "your day".

We do hear wedding party regret around here a lot, which is sad but can happen.

Etiquette isn't someone telling you what to do at your wedding, it's about treating your guests with their comfort and feelings in mind. Again, once you involve other people, their needs have to matter too.

I'm glad you've been able to let it go! Good for you!

View Quoted Comment In my opinion there’s etiquette and then there’s guests and other people getting offended about something that they shouldn’t be. In reference to the person who commented that, I’m not going to miss out on celebrating with my family/friends because a bachelorette party for an elopement doesn’t follow “etiquette.” To me, it’s nobody’s business what I decide to do and if the people participating have no problem with it then I don’t see why anyone else needs to care. If someone did had a problem with it, I have no issue with them declining to attend. I’ve found on WW that people are too concerned with the married couple catering to the guests alone. I’m happy to accommodate guests within the realm of what I want on my wedding day (and we have!) I don’t get why some guests feel they’re entitled to a bigger opinion on someone else’s wedding day. I would never be offended if someone decided to not invite me to something or cater to me on their wedding day. The main reason we chose to elope is because of that reason alone—people tend to insert their opinions on what you should and shouldn’t do on your wedding day and to me that’s not okay. If you want to follow etiquette and tradition for your wedding by all means do so, and I won’t say a thing about it, but let people do what they want for their day without getting offended. All in all, none of this matters anymore to be honest. The situation has been fixed and I’ve moved on lol. I appreciate the conversation and do agree with some of your points. I hope you have a great day

My best friend is one of my MOHs, and due to financial and mental health issues she decided to sell her house in the city we grew up in, and move up to the house she and her SO are renovating in ME. She planned on doing this next year, but she was so burnt out with work and city life. I was kind of upset, because she and my Matron of Honor/Sister were supposed to plan my bridal shower together, and then things got muckled. But, at the end of the day I'm grateful she let me know and was honest. I think it you can get the girls you are having issues with to be honest, things will be much better for you. I'm so sorry your feelings are hurt. It is so hard when you don't feel supported...I hope you can get more hands to help you.

Firstly I’m so sorry this is happening to you!! I do not think you are overreacting at all! I’d definitely have a conversation. If she is a close friend you should be able to talk to her about anything. THAT being said. Why on earth is she not sure if she can come to your wedding?! Why say yes to being in a wedding let alone maid of honor if you can’t at bare minimum commit to being there on the wedding day