My fiancé and I have been engaged for 1 year and a half already. When he first proposed in 2020, his mom said she felt absolutely hurt and cried and complained about her blood pressure rising to due the "stress" we caused her for not telling her beforehand. She felt it was too soon for us and that we weren't ready, so we delayed planning until the next year in 2021. We started planning in the end of the year to get married in April, and again, she was unsupportive, saying she was never told our plans would begin so soon even though my fiance had already talked to her about our plans again but he said she would simply ignore him or take it as a joke so that was on her. In January of this year, she came to my house to talk to my parents in hopes of convincing them to join her side in trying to stop our marriage from happening, saying we're still too young and that there's no rush. We're both 23 by the way, soon to be 24 this year!! Mind you, she had 3 kids by our age already, but yet she wants my fiance to wait until he's almost 30! Her other excuse was money and that she felt we wouldn't have enough to live together because we don't have completed careers, but my fiance is set to finish dental school in May and I'm set to work in school settings and office settings. She also said April was too soon given it was only 3 months away. In the end, we again decided to postpone it until September of this year. I told my fiance I did not want to delay it again. It is 6 months away now and timing and money is no longer the issue. But now he said that she feels that she doesn't know me well enough yet so that we should wait until we know each other more! Even though I've gone to countless of their family gatherings and talked to them many times. He said she constantly yells at him, giving him every excuse to rethink getting married so soon. And the worst part is he got on her side and started telling me I should do that! For what? What doesn't she trust about me when I've been nothing but kind and generous to their family?? I don't know. If she really wanted to get to know me on a closer level, then she would've invited me out to eat or shop with her every now and then but she never has these past years that I've been around! Suddenly I'm just a stranger??! Of course we aren't super close but I'd always get her gifts for her birthday and be friendly and bring food for family gatherings and she knows all about my beliefs, education, hobbies, etc!
She also thinks it's not right of him to get married before his older sister, which why does that matter??!
She told my fiance that if we continue with plans to marry this year, that she will not even show up, and neither will his sisters because they are also on her side, so now my fiance says he doesn't even think he'd want a ceremony or reception if his own family won't be there. It's ridiculous and I'm starting to rethink if I even want to be a part of this family. I told my fiance that if he plans to get keep waiting until whenever his mother says its okay then I don't think I will keep waiting around at this point if he plans to postpone it yet again. I was crying last night because I just can't believe she's being so terrible to me and I'm so jealous of future brides that have great future mother-in-laws.
