Married 4 days and people are being....interesting

You-married-the-love-of-your-life......and THAT is how you shut all that noise out. Nothing anyone else has to think or say about the matter is relevant anymore when it comes to you and your partner. It's literally a PARTNERSHIP, arm in arm, you both against all negative energy. Please enjoy being a newlywed and have an amazing honeymoon, you both deserve it.

Youi honestly can't shut some people down if insensitive behavior is in their blood. But, you can control how you respond to it instead. I agree with other posters that your first response should be letting them know that you have made your decision, and will no longer be discussing the topic. And then you have to stick to it - do not engage in the conversation any further, or continue to explain yourself, etc. If they still won't let it go, temporarily block them for a month or so to give yourself some peace. I hope you can enjoy the rest of your honeymoon!

The nerve of people lol. I do see why they would have questions, but for them to harass you like that is rude. It's your life and you can do whatever you want! I would just honestly ignore them. I've had toxic family members in my life where I just ignore them and I have them blocked on social media. My poor parents have to deal with them sometimes because "they're family", but I'm like to heck with that lol.

And as far as for having kids like are they going to help you raise that kid? Are they willing to babysit a few times out of the week? Will they be delivering formula and diapers when needed?

You've already made up your mind and you need to stand by your choice. Don't let them get into your head. And if they are judging you then so be it. Again it's your life. You are the one who controls it. Not them.

Oh man yea that's a part of the newlywed life haha. i swear i've been married 2.5 years now and all day every day i get asked about do we have kids? when do we expect to have kids? when are kids coming? etc

i also didn't change my last name but people didn't care about that as much as the kids part. i know what you mean though it can be frustrating because it's a question that comes up A LOT. i don't blame people for asking it, but i think i just get sick of hearing it haha. but that's also the problem - you can't really shut people down about it. there's gonna be people who innocently didn't know it was a touchy topic, etc.

you just gotta politely be like no.... and then onto next topic.

I sympathize with you and I promise I am not being dismissive of how annoying that is, but learning how to just not let rude comments get to you is a vital life skill. There will always be intrusive know-it-alls in your life and the sooner you learn how to just deal with them quickly and move on, the better it will be for you.

First know that there are no magic words to convince people like that to see your side/respect your opinion. So you are only hurting yourself by trying. For the people who you want to maintain a relationship with, state your point once then change the subject. Continue to change the subject each time, even going so far as to leave the room or the text (or the restaurant! I've had to do this with my father-in law!) as needed.

For strangers, acquaintances, or toxic family members you don't intend to maintain relationships with, just ignore from the start. And social media is the easiest of all, thanks to blocking/hiding/unfollowing features.

“How do you know we aren’t struggling to fall pregnant?” Or if you want to go nuclear, “are you asking when my husband is going to cum in me without a condom?”

I've seen a number of your posts and it honestly sounds like you have several really toxic people in your life that just need to be cut out. It sounds like a number of the people around you do not respect your boundaries, and its not going to get any better unless you are very firm and very clear. You sound like a people pleasing person who tries to avoid conflict, as go so far as to diffuse situations where people are acting monstrously instead of just being direct and not tolerating their BS. I think you need to establish some firm boundaries and stop accommodating people who cross them.

Your decision about keeping your name is yours alone. Whether or not you have kids is not up for discussion by anyone other than you and your husband. End of story. If people don't like it, too bad. They can either shut up or be shut out.

Also if you are on your honeymoon, shut the rest of the world out. You can ignore your phone and step away from social media for a few days or a couple weeks to enjoy newlywed life with your husband. Aside from maybe letting some loved ones know you arrived to your destination okay, you don't need to pay any attention to the outside world at this point and should just enjoy a nice vacation with your new husband.

First off, I don't think making a post on social media on what your views were regarding very personal things was even necessary, because by doing that, you're making it open to public opinion and discussion. Secondly, you should re-evaluate the people around you or who you consider "close" because it sounds like they're toxic. It also sounds like you might need to set stronger boundaries and stand up for yourself. People will try to push you as far as they can, but for your own sanity and well-being, you can't let them. You need to make your point clear and stick by it. No one has a right to harass you about anything, not even family. Anyone who doesn't respect your boundaries has no place being in your life. Trust me, your life will be better without them in it.

Very well said!