Memory candle lighting during ceremony

This is an excellent idea! So heartfelt ❤️ I’m having a memory table w/ a sign,
”We know you would be here today if Heaven weren’t so far away”

(cliche I know)

however I don’t think order matters. 🤷🏽‍♀️ if they are random then you won’t have to worry about hurting anyone’s feelings!

Good luck and congratulations dear!!

I think you should write and say the names that is most fitting for you. What feel right to you. For example my mom and grandmother have both passed away.... if it were me I would put grandma peggy and for my mom maybe something like my loving mother monica. I wouldn't want to put monica mcconnell for her. It feels cold to me. Maybe not cold...but not from the heart.

Thanks for the feedback

@ Meagan, so very true!!! - - I'm going with the famililal names, this helps soooooo very much

Hi Jean! I agree, however you'd like & is most familiar to you will be absolutely perfect. I think it's really great that you are doing this. Will you be having any photos of these loved ones anywhere on your wedding day too?

Such a great idea! I would list their names how they are the most meaningful to you.

Beautiful. It’s completely up to you!

I'm going to suggest avoiding turning your wedding, a happy event, into a memorial service, a sad one. I'd find a less in your face way to remember loved ones.

View Quoted Comment

I agree with this.

Not sad at all to me, and it is one of the aspects of my marriage experience I'm most looking forward to putting together - - but thanks for the feedback!

Jean

View Quoted Comment It might not seem sad to you, but I suspect that it would be for a number of your guests. Their feelings matter.

Then you are free to get up and leave a ceremony - -correct?? if a simple honorable moment grosses you out? Not holding anyone hostage!!

Nor am I going to have it spoil my day, nor will I give a care what others think

If I sat down and stressed about what each of my 200 guests "thinks" about my choices and ideas, and taking it too personally, I wouldnt ever get anything accomplished --

This is too funny

View Quoted Comment Never said gross. I do think that people who don't stop and consider if something would make their GUESTS sad need to check their attitudes. This isn't about every choice you make. It's about being kind to loved ones by not stirring up heavy hearted feelings.

There are a ton of ways to acknowledge loved ones without turning things into a memorial service. Favorite colors, flowers, drinks, songs, etc can be incorporated. Bouquet and boutonniere charms can be used. Special jewelry worn. Elements from special clothing can be sewn into dresses or ties. Let the memorials be personal and subtle. Nearly a dozen candles lit in the middle of the ceremony isn't that at all.

Or you can choose the very real chance of someone becoming unexpected emotional and sobbing mornful tears. I've seen it happen. It's pretty hard to maintain your composure when Aunt Jenny is sniffling and groaning (and embarrassed) behind you as she is suddenly overcome with sorrow because Uncle Marco couldn't be at your wedding.

At the end of the day though, I really don't care what you do.

This is a beautiful way to honor your loved ones. I think you should do things how you think it should happen. Maybe put the titles/names of how you addressed them or how you want to remember them. I think the more personal. the better!

Do not concern yourself with Mim's comments. This user has posted many rude comments and has given unsolicited advice to many people, myself included. It is your wedding day, and ultimately, it's what you want to do!