Skip to main content
ARE YOU A VENDOR?

Post content has been hidden

To unblock this content, please click here

Imani
Master July 2022

mil Attending Bachelorette Party?

Imani, on July 19, 2022 at 4:49 PM Posted in Parties and Events 0 34
Saved
Reply
Is this normal? My MIL called me and asked what the plans were for the bachelorette party. She said she would like to join. I love her and she’s super fun to be around. However, my mom will not be attending. I told her what we’d be doing and she’s adamant about hanging out with us.


Now, personally I don’t mind. BUT, it’s going to be 13 of us and none of us are her age. (I know age doesn’t matter but I’d at least want her to have someone else tag along for her own comfort) Maybe that’s just my assumption. If my daughter had a bachelorette party I would not want to be in attendance, but that’s just me. I feel if she joins we won’t be able to ‘let loose’ like we would want if she’s not there. I hope this makes sense. I could definitely be overthinking this and she would have a great time with all of us and wouldn’t mind the extra. Is any of you alls MIL partaking in your bachelorette party?

34 Comments

Latest activity by Imani, on July 27, 2022 at 8:09 AM
  • Sarah
    Master September 2019
    Sarah ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    My MIL passed away long before we got married, but when I married my first husband my MIL wasn't in attendance for my bachelorette party. I feel like I would have been super guarded about my behavior with her around, but we didn't have a great relationship to begin with. I think either way it should be 100% your choice, so if you're having any reservations about it, I would let her know that it will just be you and your friends and that maybe you can find another night to celebrate with her.

    • Reply
  • Imani
    Master July 2022
    Imani ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    Literally same. And I don’t want to feel like that, I want to be comfortable. We’re having a family dinner Saturday evening and also getting our nails and feet done together Saturday morning. I think that should be fine right?
    • Reply
  • Paige
    VIP October 2022
    Paige ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    I've never heard of a parent tagging along for the bachelorette party. My mom always asks if we're planning to go to a strip club at mine, and even if that's what we do, I 100% would not want to be around my mom at one. If you're not comfortable with your MIL joining, I'd just say that it's just going to be you and your friends and that you're looking forward to hanging out with her on that Saturday.

    • Reply
  • Imani
    Master July 2022
    Imani ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    Yeah, I think that’s what I’ll tell her. Because Friday evening we’ll have a pre bachelorette party at my place & it’s possible that she will be staying the night with us due to her husband flying in the next morning. ( She’s coming in from out of state) I don’t mind her being apart of that - but when we leave at 8pm I’m going to need her to stay back. I’ll give her a call either this evening or the weekend to let her know the game plan. I think she will be fine with that. Thanks Paige!
    • Reply
  • G
    Dedicated September 2023
    Grace ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    I've not had this experience, but my fiance had to face a similar issue when he was a best man for a friend. His friend's FIL tags along to everything (like, definitely beyond what he should), and he really really wanted to go to the bachelor party. Now, the party my fiance planned wasn't anything that would be inappropriate, but also.... does this guy really want his FIL there? My fiance put his foot down and said he could not attend. And they had a great time, and I'm sure were far more relaxed without a parent in attendance.

    I personally would not want my MIL there. Even if we were just hanging out. Also, since you already told your mom that she can't come, I think it's only fair to relay the same to the MIL. The boundary has already been set, you just need to point to it. Obviously, you can be gentle about this, maybe offer to do something else together? Get dinner with her and your mom or something? But I'd definitely not waver on this.

    • Reply
  • Imani
    Master July 2022
    Imani ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    That might be a good idea. Maybe after we get our nails and toes done we could all have lunch together. I think that would be a good idea! Because like you said, we’re more relaxed without a parent. This will work. Thanks a lot Grace!
    • Reply
  • Traci
    Expert May 2025
    Traci ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    I totally understand, maybe she could hang out the 1st half. Or just tell her to sit this one out. Good luck. Have FUN.
    • Reply
  • Imani
    Master July 2022
    Imani ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    Thank you so much Traci!!!
    • Reply
  • Sarah
    Master September 2019
    Sarah ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    It sounds like you're including her in more than enough!
    • Reply
  • Imani
    Master July 2022
    Imani ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    Perfect! Thanks Sarah!
    • Reply
  • Samantha
    Expert April 2022
    Samantha ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    My SIL invited my mom (her MIL) to hers, but it was very low key - painting class (with some wine) and dinner - and had an older crowd (her mom, aunts, close family friends) overall. Aside from this example, I don’t know anyone else that has invited their mom or MIL (or they asked to attend). Several, myself included, did have their MIL offer/host a bridal luncheon for them though. On the opposite side, I know a few grooms that invited their dad to their bachelor party, but only one invited their FIL.
    • Reply
  • Imani
    Master July 2022
    Imani ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    I would definitely do a luncheon with her and my mom. Possibly even both sister in laws. We’re doing a pedal party and we’ll bar hop. My MOH has a scavenger hunt and some of things I would not want to do in front of my MIL. I’ll definitely talk to her but I’m sure she’d be fine. At least that’s what I hope. Thanks Samantha!
    • Reply
  • Kimberly
    Just Said Yes November 2022
    Kimberly ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    I'm not sure how you going to dodge this one. Also, I am not understanding why she is insisting. Like you mentioned your mom wont be there and no one her age will be there. Its a night fir you and your girls, I think she should sit this one out.

    • Reply
  • R
    Rockstar
    Rosebud ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Are you and your partner having a joint Bachelorette party? if her child is going to be there maybe she s just trying to spend as much time you both as she can while in town. I can understand why that might be awkward for you though, its really sweet of you to plan some other events for her to be apart of during that time. I d have your fiancee talk with her mom about it. Good luck to you!!!

    • Reply
  • Imani
    Master July 2022
    Imani ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    I definitely agree! She wanted to get a shirt and everything. We’re getting our nails and toes done the next morning. Inviting her to lunch after with my mom is an option. But I do think it’s best she don’t attend the actual party.
    • Reply
  • Imani
    Master July 2022
    Imani ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    We thought about having a pool party with everyone Friday as we both have mutual friends. But since her brothers and dad are arriving Saturday we decided not to do the pool party anymore. I’m having my party Friday and she’s doing hers Saturday. I think with the lunch the next day and her hanging out prior to she’d be okay with staying back.
    • Reply
  • Kimberly
    Just Said Yes November 2022
    Kimberly ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    Nice, I like that idea. That’s a nice compromise. And it includes your mom also. So you are your girls can let loose and enjoy!
    • Reply
  • Imani
    Master July 2022
    Imani ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    Right! Most importantly!
    • Reply
  • H
    Just Said Yes August 2022
    Helen ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    What are you planning on doing that you don’t want your mil to see?
    • Reply
  • Imani
    Master July 2022
    Imani ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    My MOH have a scavenger hunt that we’ll be doing. We’re doing a bike bar (pedal party) and we go to different bars throughout the night. So we’ll have ‘activities’ (ask someone to buy a drink) take a shot off one of my friends. Stuff like that and I don’t want her there judging me. Lol I want to be comfortable and if she’s there I won’t be.
    • Reply

You voted for . Add a comment 👇

×

Related articles

13 Fun Bachelorette Party Game Ideas the Whole Group Will Love
Bachelor & Bachelorette Parties 13 Fun Bachelorette Party Game Ideas the Whole Group Will... We've made a list of our favorite bachelorette party games that the whole squad...
The Best Bachelorette Party Favors for Games and Goodie Bags
Bachelor & Bachelorette Parties The Best Bachelorette Party Favors for Games and Goodie Bags... These bachelorette party favor ideas aren't just the perfect swag for welcome...
22 Show-Stopping Outfits for Your Wedding After-Party
Wedding Fashion 22 Show-Stopping Outfits for Your Wedding After-Party Keep the party going with an outfit change into one of these jaw-dropping looks....
Read more articles
WeddingWire celebrates love ...and so does everyone on our site! Learn more

Groups

Show more

WeddingWire article topics