moh Asking About Bachelorette Party Budget...?

Only go by her words don't assume what's not there. You made it clear your budget see said it's fine that's what you go by. Why borrow trouble and stress.

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I guess since she said "But it's good to know out front to see what everybody's budget is to see if me or the bride need to cover for a few things and also make things optional, for example, meals." made me feel bad because the MOH and the bride would have to shell out more money.

If she wants to put out a ton of money into the bachelorette party, that’s her own prerogative. I can see why you think she was disappointed with your number, but I think that is a reasonable amount of money to put in for a weekend. I would ask if she’s making a full schedule for every day. You can save a lot of money by allowing everyone to do their own things during the day instead of fancy brunches and spa treatments. Planning everything down to each meal is controlling, and to me would not feel like a vacation if everything was dictated without my input. I think if you talk to her a little more you’ll be able to sort out those details. I’m sure you’re not the only one thinking this.

That's alot of money, you shouldn't feel bad at all.

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She's just doing her duty. Bride and MOH should consult BM's about their budget before the party is planned. It seems like your budget wasn't considered before they decided so I wouldn't feel bad at all.

I have to agree with @October2019, don't read more into the text than the words say. That can create whole issues for no reason. I think you did the right thing by telling her your budget and I hope you stick to that amount and don't feel like you need to do more. That's a lot of money to be spending and it sounds like she's willing/able to make up the difference for those that don't have or want to spend as much discretionary income.

Do not feel bad at all. Everyone has a different financial situation. If I were you, I would opt out of the bachelorette party. Your bride should understand. I believe saving for a child is way more important than a bachelorette party/trip.

Don’t read too much into it. You gave a reasonable number, she gave a reasonable response. It sounds like she’s just trying to gather an inventory. I didn’t read it as disappointed or hostile at all. But it can be hard to determine tone from a text.

I think everything will be fine! Her response sounds good, keep in mind it's pretty awkward for the MOH to ask about budgets when she doesn't know everyone well. I actually did this for my MOH because she felt funny. However, the way we did it was everyone pays their portion of the room then in a group chat without me in it everyone volunteered for what they felt comfortable contributing. So some girls paid for their spot in the hotel room and nothing else and others purchased a ton of decorations and stuff like that. Everyone bought me a drink at some point. Basically everyone just did what they could budget wise and it worked out great! It was extremely important to me that everyone came to my bachelorette so I made sure it was a fair distance from everyone (no one had to fly but we all had equal driving distance) and everyone could afford the hotel. If the bachelorette means that much to the bride, I'm sure that she will do everything she can to make sure everyone can come.

I think you are overthinking this. The MOH should be asking everyone what their budget is before planning anything and if she or the bride want to do something that is above everyone's budget then they should pay for it. It sounds like that is what she is intending. Brides are expected to pay for their own way for expensive bachelorette parties especially when flights and overnight accommodations are needed.

She seems perfectly polite from what your post says. I wouldn't be too worried, she probably just wants everyone to have fun and wants you to know that even on your budget, things will work.

I'm sorry. I can't even really answer this question because I'm so hung up on the fact that the bride has told you that she'd rather you all go to her bachelorette party over her actual wedding. That just seems so odd to me. The wedding is the whole point of the bachelorette party. Lol. This is bugging me out!

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I know. She's a huge party girl, so it kind of makes sense. But at the same time, your wedding day is one of the most important days of your life.

I think it was all good intentions. We asked my bridesmaids if they think they would be able to go away for my bach and some weren't sure they would be able to go on vacation and come into town for my wedding (all are out of state) so we adjusted. Always need to know where ppl stand to plan