moh quit the wedding

I agree with previous posters. It sounds like you've done your best to make it doable for her to come. There's not much else you can do. I'm thinking she may be embarrassed about finances and doesn't want to impose on you/make you feel like you need to cover or help with her expenses. Don't try and replace her as MOH, it is okay to not have a "party" stand up with you. We're not having a bridal party because I have like one girlfriend and FH has a few guy friends but we agree it's less headache and expense to just have us up there that day.

If your FH has a best man/groomsmen, maybe he can have them sit in the first row instead of standing during the ceremony so it doesn't look so lopsided. Otherwise bridal party doesn't really matter after the ceremony.

Just remember as the others have said, you really aren't alone in not having tons of friends. Focus on family and FH, and let your friend know it's okay if she can't come, but you'll really miss her and hope she might reconsider.

I am so sorry you had to go through all of this, with a friend, and so close to the wedding. I never had that many girlfriends either. When I was married the first time, I had my 2 close cousins as attendants, one from either side of the family. When hubby and I were married, I wasn't close with anyone, my cousins were attending another close family wedding, which they'd known about (our wedding was planned in 8 weeks), and my best and oldest friend was newly married and living across the country (I wasn't at her wedding either), and expecting her 1st baby. So I had my brother's wife with whom I was close at the time. I don't know what to advise you, I've not heard of a MOH pulling out of a wedding party before,(most MOH's I know are the brides' sisters) but here are some thoughts: do you need 2 witnesses? Do you have a brother, nephew, close cousin you could ask? Perhaps 2 of FH's groomsmen could be the witnesses? Could your Mom perhaps be MOH? - I've heard of Moms standing up for daughters, and btw, Dads for their sons. (Our son will BM for his Dad at our upcoming Catholic convalidation ceremony) Or, an aunt? I know if I lost my MOH I'd literally die. She's a very dear, longtime friend, nearly 15 years, and we've become very much closer in the past couple of years -she's helped me get the church annulment, and planned this convalidation with me, plus she helped me through a serious illness and surgery a year ago. I know it's awkward asking someone to step in as a 2nd choice, but as it can't be helped, go with it. I truly hope this works out for you and I wish you and your fiance a beautiful wedding day and a lifetime of joy!

I wonder in part if the friend has just become soured on marriage or does not want to be reminded how hers seemed good to do at the time but became a bad experience. But that may not be the full explanation since she is going to the brother's wedding. The only additional thing to this all was that she had you involved in helping in the legal arrangements for the divorce and that those images come up -- or that you are too knowledgeable of her experience. Is she just attending that other wedding and just as a guest? If just as a guest, she might be more comfortable as a guest in the brother's wedding.

Then I can understand why you are so upset. After all you seem to have done for her, and in this wedding, you've bent over backwards to help her, she's just not the friend you thought you had. Do you think she's jealous? Jealousy has broken up more friendships, and even with sisters. (My MOH and her sister have not spoken since their mom passed about 20 years ago. The sister was always jealous of her, and when the mom died, she left everything to my MOH because the sister was a troublemaker all her life, and had stopped talking to her mom right up to when she died, whereas my MOH took care of both the parents, and her sister's husband too after a stroke. But when the sister found out that Mom had left everything to my MOH, she stopped talking to her. So one reason we're so close is that we've become like sisters. I don't have a sister, only a brother who died 12 years ago. Jealousy is stupid but it's a powerful emotion. It's hard to have a friend feel that you no longer matter (my brother's wife got like that and began treating me poorly after our kids were born for who knows what reason - I never did anything to her, quite the opposite, and I helped take care of my brother til he died.) I don't understand why people do this to eachother. Being MOH aside, I hope you find a friend who values your friendship, who trusts you as you trust her, and who will share in your joy.