So, let me start by saying that my parents are... well, not really emotional people when it comes to me, but are when it comes to my two siblings. I'm my mom's step daughter, my real mom passed away in a car accident 2 years ago.
When my fiance and I first got engaged, my step mom acted like she was excited and wanted to take part in things. but every time I've asked for her to participate, she's not interested or too busy. That hurt, but because she was acting excited still, I didn't let it bother me too much. Now, with the wedding 3 weeks away, she's started actively distancing herself from things. she went to the bridal shower and kept saying passive aggressive things the entire time, made it known to everyone that she wasn't wanting me and my FH to go on a honeymoon and instead wanted us to save money.
~ Some back story - we have a decent savings account and are paying for our own wedding. Recently our car was rear ended by someone while FH was at a stoplight, and we asked for a mini loan (2k) that they had offered so we didn't have to worry about the "just in case" issues that pop up with a wedding, and told them we would pay it back after the wedding if nothing big happened, and after january if something did happen. We would pay 100/mo up until the wedding as well. they told us to finance for 2k and that they decided to not help us, even though previously they had offered to help if we needed it, and told my FH to get a second job if we couldn't afford to buy the car. you know, RIGHT BEFORE A WEDDING. we ended up swinging it and still have a decent amount left, and since then she's been turning her nose up at ANY purchase we make. It's like she's mad we didn't have to finance.
She's also declined getting ready with us, declined hair and makeup that I was providing for her, declined a getting ready robe and told me that they're really on a budget with how much they can spend on dad's suit, my sister's shoes, and my brother's outfit. (my parents are VERY well off. like, just bought my sister a pair of $800 shoes for her to wear on the 1st day of high school well off) - Again, I told my dad the suit he had was fine. My step mom ASKED ME if my brother could be an usher, and my sister's dress was 150, and I told her she could just borrow my shoes. I'm at a loss here... I keep trying to include her and she keeps pushing away. Keeps telling me she doesn't like my decisions, and doesn't seem interested at ALL in being a part of the day. She's the only mom I have left and I just don't know what to do at this point. I've tried talking to her about it and she pretends she doesn't know what I'm talking about. I just can't figure out how I've offended her. She was pretty horrible to me in high school when I moved in, and I worked hard to move past that and forgive so we could have a good relationship and I thought we'd gotten there... but now it's all slipping again.
idk. I want my wedding day to be happy and I wanted her to help me into my dress and be there as my mom for my wedding, but at this rate, I just really wish my mom was still here.
