Mother In-law Banned From Wedding

Ohhhh snap!!!!
And she's in town may I add.

I’m sorry that you’re put in this situation. I would let your fiancé know that she contacted you and see where to go from there.

View Quoted Comment Girrrlll that's like WW3 waiting to happen....
Lol you got some floor space for me to crash on cuz I'm not About to be around for the blow up

View Quoted Comment I was just going to ignore get requests and keep it moving

View Quoted Comment I don’t know if I’d ignore it. I wouldn’t want your fiancé’s mom to let him know that she’s reached out to you and he didn’t know. I know it may be WW3 to let him know, but I’d rather him be upset with his mom for reaching out to you than for him to be mad at her for reaching out AND you for not telling him. And you wouldn’t have to crash on the floor ... I’ll give you a spare bedroom (and at the very least, a sofa) to crash if you need it. Lol! 😊

Oh ... and congrats on the new baby!!!

View Quoted Comment Lol, I may tell him but his beef is with his mom and I'm not trying to have friction

Stand your ground as a united front with your fiance. Maintain the boundaries that set in place and do not betray his trust by giving into her bullying. Block all means of contact so she cannot reach you.

View Quoted Comment

Yes, this. I don't think you are actually in the middle. There is no middle when it comes to firm boundaries with abusers. I would tell your finance she contacted you, because you and he shouldn't keep secrets from each other. But then drop the subject.

I would let him know she has contacted you on social media, and you don't want to proceed in a fashion he isn't comfortable with (maybe even just you but not him having contact with her is too close for comfort for him?). My ex-MIL behind my back gave my abusive bio mom information on me and my children, including photos and our address. I only found out it was her (though suspected prior) when she flippantly told me. It was a major breech in trust that someone close to my life was reaching out to someone I had high boundaries about.

Definitely tell your fiancé. Ask him if he wants you to just ignore or if he wants you to block her. Imagine if a person you hate reached out to him to try to get pictures, wouldn’t you be upset if he didn’t tell you?

Definitely talk with your fiancé. If my husband was in that situation I would respect what he wanted without question. Especially if I already knew the situation. You could always simply tell her to contact your fiancé 🤷🏾‍♀️

I would most definitely tell your fiancé that his mother contacted you. It isn't a good idea to go into a marriage with secrets especially if he were to find out later on that you kept it from him.

You need to tell him. I would ask to send a pic of the baby to het but only a physical photo via mail. No online/digital sharing.

View Quoted Comment I told him he said ignore her

View Quoted Comment

Then do that. Don’t get in the middle of their relationship (or lack thereof).

Block her. You are not in the middle unless you allow yourself to be.

And of course tell him. He knows her and has made the choice to be estranged from her.

View Quoted Comment I would do just that! Maybe they can reconnect in the future, but if I were you I wouldn't get involved.

View Quoted Comment Don't even do this if he says he wants nothing to do with her and that bride to be is explicitly told not to give MIL anything.