Mother Problems

In addition to gifts, you could register for gift cards, you could create a honeymoon fun, or you could simply not register for gifts at all and people will get the hint.

People who want to give you money will do so even without you directly mentioning it on your website. Most of our guests brought us a card or check to the reception, not online.

When someone else pays, they make all decisions. If you want want full control, give back the money parents offered and plan the wedding you can afford yourselves. Money always comes with strings attached.

The best thing about this is you don't have to do anything. People who gift cash will do so anyway, usually in a card. Just have a card box at the wedding, and appoint someone in charge of taking care of this.

As for your mother's other input, she pays so she does have a say. Fighting is pointless as you let her into the planning. If you don't want your parents financial assistance, then make a plan with your partner to save for your wedding. Many people do this. I almost think parental contribution is less common now. Good luck.

I would agree with your mother. People know that they can gift cash or check in a card. You don't need to tell them how to do that.

In my social circle you register for gifts which people usually purchase if there is a shower or other wedding events (engagement party etc) and the actual wedding gift is usually cash or a check in a card. But money is never actually requested. I think every family and friends group handles it differently though so definitely a know your crowd thing. Good luck!

Your mother has a point, and this is not an unreasonable request. If you don't register, people will hopefully get the hint. In your website explain that you're not registered because you're in a small space and saving for a bigger home

Yes, no need to ever ask for cash gifts. Everyone knows money is a good gift. We had a very small registry and left it at that. The few guests who wanted to give physical gifts had some options, but most people just gave monetary gifts. We didn’t have to ask or say anything to tell them that they should do it. Mom is right here. Pick your battles. Just because she’s against asking for cash gifts doesn’t mean cash gifts can’t/won’t happen.

Congratulations to you both but the is no win here because some parents think that it's there way to push what they want and not. Understanding that this not their wedding a is projecting there wants since they paying for the wedding. Sometimes I wish that they pull away from that part. Because its not my mother my kids and a close friend that telling what I need or could have at my wedding. At the end of the day but try to have a talk with her and let her know. That mom I really appreciate what she is doing for you. I t needs to be your choice of the vision that you see and not looking like the wedding your parents or your mother wants doing thru your wedding. And for your ideas so it feel like it's your wedding day you and your FH. I hope that you talking with her it wont be tense and as far as the gifting of money have a card box and that with a lock and have someone else be in charge of that and keep it away from mom lol

Unfortunately money comes with strings a lot of the time. The only way to call your own shots at the wedding is to pay for it yourself. Otherwise you'll have to work with your mom's involvement.

It's not considered polite to ask for money from your guests. However, most will likely do a monetary gift anyway, especially if you just do a very small registry.