Moving Back in With Parents

I wish my fiance would have chosen to stay living with his parents during the 2 or so years we were dating to save money. But he didn't.


I did. I stayed with my parents til I was 31 and had been engaged for 3 months.As a result, my vehicle is paid off, my student loans are paid off, and I was able to save up a 20% downpayment for our home and we don't have to pay an extra $100 or so PMI every month.
If your fiance is into the idea, go for it. You dont have to stay a full year. You could choose to stay til the wedding.
I'm very pro this idea, but I'm not in your shoes.

Unless something catastrophic happened, we wouldn’t consider moving in with our parents. Part of being a responsible adult is budgeting and working through financial hurdles. If we couldn’t both be responsible adults, we would recognize that we weren’t ready for marriage.

I have been on my own for way too long to move back in with my parents. My parents are fantastic, but still. I also am a bit older than you and stuck in my ways.
In your scenario, I may be able to bite the bullet and suck it up. It’s only a year, and if you’re still in college and will have student teaching to do, you’re not going to be home with too much free time. And most of that free time will be spent on wedding planning. So in the long run, I don’t think it will be as bad as you think. A year will fly by before you even notice. If you do move back in with them, I would give yourself a firm move out date so that you don’t end up living there forever. That will also give you the motivation to save money and stay positive about the situation.

I’m all in support of doing what is needed to save and I support if you have to move home to do it. However, the two of your moving together to your parents house may not be in you guys best interest. My boyfriend (now fiancé) and I had to move in with my mom and my sister and brother for about a month in a half until our apartment was ready. And let me tell you they were the worst 6 weeks for us. So many arguments and drama between the family everyone was in our business. It Definitely put a strain on our relationship. It’s impossible to have an argument as a couple without your parents down the hall hearing or them interjecting on your relationship. If you are able to I would say don’t move in with your parents. Unless it’s just you going alone and he goes to his parents, it gets too complicated when you move home as a couple. My boyfriend never truly felt comfortable staying there even though he was all for it in theory but it’s different when you are actually there.

The two of you need to sit down And create a budget plan. Have every single monthly bill and subscription written out then see where you can save even if it’s just 50 bucks a paycheck. This is how my fiancé and I are saving for our wedding. We used the 50% 25% 25% rule to save. 50 perfect of our earrings to our bills, 25 to personal savings and the other 25 to wedding savings. You can adjust these numbers to fit your budget. Good luck

My fiancé and I have been out on our own for a year now. My family moved 13 hrs away and his family is planning on doing the same in 2 years. We will be moving into his parents house when they move to save money and see if we like the area and get ourselves more established from the far move. So this will be 3 years of us being on our own before moving into his parents. I do think it will be a challenge and feel like a step back but it will help better our future. I feel like it’s different situations for us but still going to be the same outcome. Sometimes you have to take a step back so you can leap forward and that’s okay. Hope this helps 💕 sorry it’s so long

My fiancé and I are moving in with my parents to save up some money pre wedding and for a house. We’ve been renting together for 3 years and it’s so so hard to save up when we’re throwing $3k at rent and utilities each month. It’s definitely going to be hard on us being with my parents but financially it’s the right choice. Sometimes ya gotta make sacrifices.

My fiancé and I currently live with my parents and we’re saving up to move out to an apartment, before we moved he popped the question and we decided not to move out until we could save up for a house and move out to a house and not an apartment. It’s a small step back yes, but a smaller step back that will help you take a huge step forward! Think about what you want in the end and if moving back home means you’ll get there faster, then do it!

It's a really tricky situation. We might be facing a similar situation in the near future. H and I have been living together in our apartment for 3 years now. My in-laws have a basement apartment that H's friends currently live in (his brother lived there before that, right after his divorce), but they're going to start looking for a house of their own soon. Once they move out I feel like it's pretty much assumed we'll move in there. We could save so much money but I don't know if I really want to. For one it's a basement so I'd miss ready access to daylight. Second it does feel like a step backwards to be moving back in with parents. But yeah...so much money could be saved.

I guess I don't really have any advice, just letting you know you're not alone in having to make a decision like this!

This is so personal and of course no one can make this decision for you two. But I would definitely consider other things besides saving money. You WILL save money (will your parents not ask for any rent or utilities or food or anything?) but at what cost? Will this risk hurting your relationship with your FS or your parents? Or your FS's relationship with your parents? Will it add other stresses to your lives?

It also comes down to priorities. I value my independence so much that it's worth more to me than money. I would have to literally be about to become homeless before I moved in with my parents or my husband's parents. But everyone is different. Good luck making your decision!

I personally think you should absolutely do it. If it's bad you can always move out. But the potential of really establishing yourselves financially before marriage is the right thing to do.
Also depends largely on your family. I couldn't do it with mine - I moved to another country at the age of 21 and been on my own ever since. My parents are also challenging to live with lol if you don't have that problem you should absolutely do it. It is not taking a step backwards...it's a leap forward

We lived with my FH mom in the beginning of our relationship and never again will we live with one our parents. It was not a good time for us (mostly bc his mom is VERY VERY clingy and controlling towards him to the point it’s weird in my opinion). He wanted to have his mom move back in with us to save money on rent and I told him it was a hard NO. His mom and I are working on our relationship together and I know living with her again would make things worse.


That being said, I think it depends on the type of relationship you have with your parents. If it’s good and you can live with them without going crazy, go for it!! I think it's worth it to save for a house and start a family😊

After I moved out of my parents house at 18, I wasn’t going back. It sounds like y’all are young and have time. I wouldn’t be in any huge rush to buy a house if it meant having to “backtrack” but that’s just my opinion! Everyone is different

This isn't uncommon. You can save a LOT of money in a year not having to pay rent and it can go towards your future. Yes living with parents will mean compromise, but I don't think its a failure of your relationship or "going backwards" if you are doing it to build a future.

I couldn't live with my mum again, even though she is lovely and we get on well. I can't see my man being game for it either. I could never live with his mum either. Unless it was a life and death scenario. For me, moving out was a permanent life decision, and even though I have been homeless a few times, I still didn't go back to my mum's. You have to do what works for you. Maybe you could do a trial period there, to see how it works out.

I would say if you have the opportunity to do so and your parents are willing then go for it. this is a huge help and you guys will save up in no time! plus its less stress for you at the end of your school

We did this last year! We were house hunting and instead of renewing our lease we moved in with my parents to save more money while we looked. We ended up living with them for about 8 months due to it taking so long to find a house but it was worth it. It was not easy, being independent and then moving in with parents is definitely weird but being able to save the amount of money that we did really helped. I would say do it if you can! Just know you need to make sure you are spending time alone when you can.

Sometimes progress is 2 steps forward and 1 step back. You do what you need to do to better your situation and if that is living with parents again, so be it. I wish I would've taken that opportunity to do that when it was offered but, of course, I was too stubborn to realize the benefit so I chose couch surfing and staying in my car some nights instead. Life isn't always perfect and as much as we try to be independent and make our own way, there are circumstances that happen and you need to look at the pros and cons of this opportunity. Yes it'll suck being with parents again, however, it will give you the opportunity to get money saved and be better off in the long run. Part of being a responsible adult is making sacrifices and doing what needs to be done to change your situation. That doesn't mean, as some people previously mentioned, that you aren't ready for marriage or you aren't responsible. It means you suck it up and do what needs to be done to make the situation better. Good Luck!

It sounds like it is more the idea of moving home that is bothering you than the practice of it. It is not a personal failure to move back in with your parents or a step back in your progress in life as an adult. Yes, public perception in the US is that it is a 'bad thing' but that is not the reality. So long as your parents are able to treat you like roommates rather than children it can actually be a great way to get to know eachother on a more equal playing field. I am much closer with my parents than either of my siblings after spending 2 years living at home as an adult.

We will also be moving back in with my family until we find somewhere to rent moving back home (also a full time college student, elementary ed, 30 credits left)! Rentals are hard to come by here so it may take some time. The way I think about it is like this- FH and I are so blessed to have family who supports and loves us enough to welcome us back into their home. It can put a financial strain on them and we are so lucky we have such a great relationship that we are able to do it. Maybe look at it like that and extra time with your family to think and plan your wedding? I am so excited to have my mom and grandma here to help DIY things while we wait for the perfect place to come up!

You should probably have a candid conversation with your parents before deciding. Find out what their expectations are from you and you from them. Spelling things out clearly in the beginning can help avoid any issues later. Remember, they will also be losing some of their privacy and way of life if you move in. Good luck with your decision. It isn’t an easy one.