My groom wants a very expensive wedding band?

I don’t understand why it’s fine for you to have an expensive ring, but not him. If you can’t afford it, discuss your budget with him and maybe you can share the cost.

I agree with Caytlyn. If that's the ring he really wants, I would talk to him about his to afford it, especially given that it's still less than half the cost of your ring.

When you guys can afford it, then buy the ones that you guys like. Same as pp, men or women are allowed to wear anything they want to.

So your ring was worthy of $5k... yet you’re actually “upset” about spending more than $300 on your FH??? 😬 well alrighty!

I agree, he should be able to have the ring he likes and 1200 is not unreasonable. I spent more than that on my dress, so I’d be happy to spend that on my fiancé.

$1200 is not unreasonable for something that he’s going to have forever especially if he likes to be fancy.

If you can’t afford it, don’t get it. But if you can afford it and just don’t want to spend the money because it’s more than the average cost of wedding bands then yes you’re being unreasonable. He will wear this forever so he should absolutely be in love with his ring, and he shouldn’t have to settle for something else, as long as you won’t get in debt over the purchase.

View Quoted Comment This is a good idea. I can’t afford it right now, that’s why I was worried when he told me this is what he wanted. I can see if him and I can work out a plan together. Thanks!

I don't think 1200 is unreasonable especially with yours being 5k but if you actually can't afford it, then let him know or check out what the payment plans would be. You can also get something for now and then surprise him with the one he wants later on for like a renewal or anniversary gift. Either way, even though he may seem a bit disappointed, I'm sure he'll still love whatever you get him.

Agree with all PPs— I feel like he should get the ring he wants as well. Especially if it’s only about 1/5 of what yours cost.


My husband also chose to get a designer band (Cartier) and although we could have gotten him a less expensive band, I wanted him to be able to have the ring he wanted considering how much thought and money he put into my engagement ring.
He’s going to wear for the rest of his life— I would just get him what he wants. If you can’t afford it right now, definitely sit down with him to discuss how to handle it. Maybe cut back on something from the wedding? Or he can pay and you pay him back?

I would go with the one he wants too

Does he want it because it’s fancy or because he loves it? If he loves it and you can afford it, buy it.

My fiancé’s ring is much more than the 1200. I told him that he should get exactly what he wants since it’s the only ring he will have. I can’t afford the one he wanted so we are sharing the costs. Just talk to him about it!

Being upset because he wants something nice is definitely unreasonable, and pretty unfair to him. On the flipside, there’s no requirement for a groom to buy the bride’s band and the bride to buy the groom’s ring. So if the issue is that he wants something you can’t afford— address *that* . I would much rather spend my own money to get the thing that I wanted than to be gifted a cheap version that I didn’t love. But, I also wouldn’t want my husband to break his own budget for my thing. The shopping and financing can be done together so that you both get what you love and what is best for your joint financial situation. We bought our rings together, choosing what we loved and paying for them in the way that made sense for our financial situation. For our rings I made one payment and he made the other— I’m not even sure what each individual ring cost , though at cost for gold I’m sure his band is more than mine since it’s just larger / more material .


For what it’s worth I think the band is a serious and worthwhile investment. It’s *the* thing that you carry with you every day as a symbol of the marriage . So much stuff that we spent on the wedding day itself was just for the day never to be seen again , but the ring is forever! On that note to have that thing you carry around with you as the one symbol of your marriage to be something that wasn’t exactly what you wanted or isn’t exactly what you love can also weigh on you.

Get him what he wants if you can afford it! My husband wanted something more expensive than what he finally chose, and he couldn’t justify spending so much on jewelry if he’s never worn a ring before. Well, he chose the next best thing and it was $1100!

My FH works in law enforcement and can’t wear a fancy ring to work every day. So we found him a ring he liked and a silicon ring for work.
If your FH can wear his ring every day and he loves it, then it is worth the investment. If he’s only going to wear it the day of your wedding, then I don’t think it’s practical.
Just my two cents.

Like PPs said, it’s something he’ll wear for the rest of his life. If it’s really important to him and you can manage to make it work with your budget I think it should be a priority. Especially when he invested time, effort and $5k in creating a custom ring for you. It’s a bit unfair to suggest a custom ring for him mainly as a way to spend less when it doesn’t sound like thats why he had your ring custom made (you can get rings for a lot cheaper than $5k at most jewelry stores)

I mean, my husband picked a plain gold band, but I was the one saying he should branch out if he wanted something more expensive. But he got the band that he wanted because it was his band. Same with my wedding band - he agreed with me on the enhancer and said it should be my pick how flashy my ring is. If the money is the problem, then maybe you guys can cut something from the wedding? I just feel like he deserves the ring he wants since this is permanent for him.

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I agree, my FH and I set budgets about our rings my ring was under 2k its not what I wanted for me but hearing the story of how he chose it and struggled to find one he liked has warmed me up to the ring and I love it. My FH wears no jewelry and so we will shop together for our bands, again we have a budget, we have a shared account and so we are both paying for it.

View Quoted Comment My FH has a silicone band from Groove Ring as well (that he already wears every day xD). Because he’s very active and does a lot of things with his hands and doesn’t feel a metal ring is safe for his lifestyle. We’re getting one for me too (they’re on Backorder xD) so I have something nice to wear until we can truly afford a fancy metal ring for me. It’s all about compromise and working together to make a decision.