My mom barely cares about my wedding

I know this might sound cold, but I really feel that for your own peace of mind, you need to accept right NOW that your mom will not live up to your expectations. Thank her for the offer to pay and travel to go dress shopping (even if you don't think the offers were genuine), then decline both and just handle it yourself. For all of the rest of your wedding planning going forward, don't rely on her for anything and keep her informed only on what's truly necessary.

She has shown you who she is; believe her. For your own sake!

Aww I'm so sorry! I'm sure she cares, but maybe she shows it differently? Or maybe she's unsure how to show that she does care?
If it really does bother you and you want her to show interest in your wedding then I would mention it to her. If you feel as if it's not worth bringing it up then just let it be. Don't mention anything anymore to her if she isn't going to be excited or show interest. If anything, bring the excitement to your girls or express it here on wedding wire!

First, whomever is telling you this is not a good friend. They are deliberately stirring up trouble.

Also, they may or may not be representing what your mother said accurately. What I would do in this situation is call my mom and ask her if she is okay coming up to buy the dress and giver her an out. Then, whatever she decides I would just roll with it.

Secondly, some people are bad on the phone. They don't like talking on it, they have a hard time hearing on it, they are easily distracted etc.... Some people don't like planning events. So even though we think our Moms should be fully invested in our wedding. Some mothers are not. This does not need to place a value on her love for you or her caring about your marriage.

You say you have had a strained relationship with your mom in the past. This affects how you interact with each other. Maybe she is trying to express no opinions on the wedding to keep her nose out of it. I don't know what your relationship is like with her on a day to day basis, but usually having a wedding does not change that interaction. If you have had a generally distant but cordial relationship previously, that will most likely continue.

We have to meet people where they are, we can't change them as much as we wish we could. Or that we wish our event, new baby, life changing circumstance would make them have an Ah Ha moment and say "now I am going to have that hallmark movie loving mother/daughter relationship" Only you know if you can or should accept the relationship your mom is showing you she is willing to have.