My “something blue” crew

I’ve seen this topic arise in other conversations, and it has not been well received. I think the general fear is that this is creating tiers amongst guests, where you are essentially ranking their relationship/importance to you. The “something blue crew” basically comes off as you telling those individuals that they weren’t important enough to be acknowledged in your wedding party, but you still want to dictate what they wear so they can essentially function as a prop/photo opportunity for your wedding. This could effectively make those people feel less important than your wedding party, while simultaneously making your other guests feel less than both groups.

View Quoted Comment Even if the guy group is close to the bride side but the bride has close girl friends too which I made my actual bridesmaids? My fiancé did come into the group but that was because of me. I see how other situations can lead to the “who’s more important.”

It seems okay to have some guys you can honor during the wedding. It makes sense because you only have the girl friends as the bride attendants. The only thing is that it can be a bit odd to identify them uniquely without actually having a more specific and identified role in the ceremony.

View Quoted Comment I don’t think it matters, as a wedding party does not need to be gender specific (ie, male friends can stand with brides and female friends can stand with grooms). I’d worry your guests who weren’t asked to wear blue would see it as “not making the cut” as wedding party, and also not making the cut as a “special guest”. Personally, I wouldn’t want to rank my guests and risk hurting their feelings.

I had never heard of this until today. Also agree with Cece. That can come off as guests being ranked. If you’d like something blue, incorporate it in your personal attire, hair, flowers, cake, or decor, but not something that would appear to guests not in the wedding party as others being of a higher tier.

If you want to honour these people, you could make them brides men on your side. Wedding parties don't have to be gender specific.

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My FH's (adult) daughter is going to be one of his grooms attendants. I have seen so many "mixed attendants" in wedding photos now that it really isn't an issue any more.

Thank you for everyone’s thought! I am honoring a group of men a different way as I am keeping tradition too. I have my bridesmaids and groomsmen. I don’t like large bridal parties, so I’m not doing that. But still thinking about honoring a group of friends of 10 years who are men.

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Did you figure out something?

Can they go down the aisle, as the groomsmen and bridesmaids do? But that might be too unusual. Can they do a dance? Some traditions have the men dancing. Or can they introduce you and groom ceremoniously at your grand entrance to the reception?