Hi guys- I really have nobody else to vent to. I feel nobody will understand because nobody else in my circle has been married or if they’re married they didn’t have a wedding.
My wedding day was on Saturday. It was truly one of the worst days of my life. I really can’t stop crying. Every single thing was wrong then went even more wrong.
I have dreamed of this day for over 20 years. I planned every detail, handmade invites, found my dress in August and ordered it 4 sizes smaller to fit into it, working out everyday, all the bridesmaids dresses were perfect! I custom made bags for each on and sent them to different states, also custom “get ready” shirts for us all to wear for photos. Oh, and finding the cake and designing it (4 tier with a different flavor on each) I went through at least 200 photographers to find the perfect photographer, I scrimped and saved to get the videographer because I want to relive this moment forever, and have it for my children and grandkids to see someday.....the centerpieces to location, done! Playlists, we took so many dance classes for our big dance(Vietnamese Waltz) I was soooo excited that after countless months of planning.....it was here!!!
It all started on Friday night, setting up the reception. Me, my bridesmaids and their friend and kids did 99% of everything. FH finally helped extend the backdrop up, then was off again. I turned around and saw my FH just at the bar having a drink with someone.... I just couldn’t deal with it. As I was killing myself (we all were) and we’re so hungry we almost ate each other, kept going. But I lost it, cue the tears because I walked out. I didn't want to make a scene in front of everyone. I went outside I couldn’t stop crying and bridesmaids came out, then FH. They tried to console me but it didn’t work too well. I just wanted HIM to help and for HIM to care. He said if they’re weren’t there, it’d be me and him doing it.....then why not now?? Fast forward a few hours and we still had some finishing touches, he insisted he’d do tomorrow (day of)....after calling off the wedding 3x he promised me it’d be done especially because he’ll have even more people to help in the morning.
He got a hotel for everyone to get ready at, my bridesmaid and I had a cottage. (At a bed in breakfast with the MOST AMAZING photo places for my dress and a walkway that was 20ft above and an AMAZING staircase) After many I’m sorry and I love you texts, we got over it and I blamed the stress of the wedding. I kept saying I’m leaving my whole ceremony in your hands and if you couldn’t even help with the reception, it feels the ceremony won’t be okay and OKAY or MEH is NOT good enough for me.....he promised it’d be great!
So at 2 am my photographer called and couldn’t make it so was sending in a sub....so after 30 min of adjustments, it got figured out. So anyways I was up til 4 am perfecting vows and doing my love letter for our first touch.....go to bed at 430 and up at 5am(no eye bags! Yay!)
then drove an hour away to get to my makeup artist (ended up double booked at her location so either cancel or drive, and no time to find someone else) I get there and my makeup was absolutely breathtaking! Everything I asked for, but more! Eeekkk it’s getting real!! FH is meeting the reception hall for the keys at 7am.....then the day from hell began, without me knowing just how bad things would go!
I confirmed this with him at 6 and at 645 he told me he’s heading there. At 7:30....the owner calls me so upset they drove here from a city away to unlock it, and nobody showed up. At 8am our spot on the beach, we paid for, had to be checked in, to be closed off.....Then I get back to the cottage and my sisters/ maid of honor arrived! Eeekkk!! Did some “wake up” photos, before heading to hair. I get to the hair place and it’s all excitement and jitters, we’ve never been apart for so long! I missed him dearly and couldn’t wait to see him.....we will be back at the cottage at 1130 for bridesmaid photos/getting ready then bride and dress portraits. (I got the most beautiful custom hanger for my dress!) so the boyfriend of my maid or honor took us to the salon and dropped us off to go help my FH. It’s now 11 and I get the message that they’re going to set up chairs and ceremony. WAIT!!! WHAT!!?? their photos at the hotel are at 12!!! So I’m trying to not cry because I’m so stressed out. My hair was FANTASTIC!!! So makeup was incredible, hair amazing....and I was told by the best man that they were 5 minutes away. We’re waiting and waiting and calling and calling....NO ANSWER!! We were stranded!! FINALLY over 40 minutes later they get there....flowers girl, ring bear and EVERYONE.....in pjs!!!!! Soooooo.....then...I get a call from my sister still at the cottage....
THEY ARE KICKING US OUT, it’s too late after check out! What!!!!! So I get there and everything is packed up....and now can’t use the house for photos. I cried more because now, I had to get ready outside, literally!!! So NO DRESS PHOTOS/ NO BRIDESMAID PHOTOS/ NO GETTING READY PHOTOS, NO VIDEO THAT SPENT SO MUCH MOMEY ON!!!
So it’s SO LATE now, on top of no photos for me, we also got NO FIRST TOUCH photos, also NO VIDEO of it....So as we are driving to the ceremony.....a friend sent me a video message, saying hurry up! So I then see, what we ARE NOT on the place we paid for, because nobody showed up. We have NO RUNNER or any of the isle decorations I made. We had SO MANY people and tents and trash behind and around us now.....Aaaannnd there is NO CAKE...NO CAKE AT THE WEDDING!!!!! So I’m trying to stay calm and not panic.
I finally walk up there ((WITH NO SHOES because only 1 of my shoes was found...it was at the reception hall! THAT was my something blue....))with and to my horror see that my FH did not shave or clean up his beard whatsoever! (It’s been atleast 6 weeks since he’s touched it) and he was wearing the wrong shoes. Then the boys didn’t have their hair done or right shoes on. I just couldn’t believe this....then came our vows....we talked about this a lot and I even read some of mine to him much time prior. We agreed on how long etc so one of us didn’t have a book and one didn’t, we both agreed that we would never wing it.....I mean.... it’s our wedding!!! So then the pastor hands him the mic. He literally said he loves me and I make him a better man. Handed it back.....I was crushed because I had a 3 page thing for him, I almost didn’t even read mine because I was embarrassed. Then we are done, did some photos on the beach.....(I never ever wanted a beach wedding but he did so I tried to compromise and give him what he wanted, it was his day too!) and I find out there is NO FOOD at the reception! And on top of that.....NO GETTING READY PHOTOS!!! They got ready in the car, literally. Are you kidding me right now!? Also means no video....
So after some photos, we were doing “first touch”’over again and.....HE NEVER WROTE THE LOVE LETTER so he got my letter and I staged my vows like a letter from him.
We finally arrived at the reception, and my sister decided to get the cake (yay) which was about an hour time total. We go inside and I asked for my drink from the bartender (we hired and purchased all the alcohol etc for, she just had to serve it because it was required by the venue) and no sex on the beach, she had no schnapps or pineapple juice.....soooo disappointing because I NEEDED that drink!!
The cake table didn’t have a actual table clothe in it NO the centerpieces were never done (putting floating candles in the bowls)
Then over to the photo booth....I took so much time personally designing the logo! And the booth was a 10x10 inflatable with an awesome touch green screen to create videos and GIFS and share to social media etc, super awesome! BUT it didn’t light up the colors besides BRIGHT WHITE, the guy forgot the green screen screen, and not a single thing that was mentioned, happened.
Then the cake arrives! Yay! Finally.....it got set up...and it is BLACK!!!! Not navy and silver, IT IS BLACK!!!!
So I decided to dance and try to have fun, as I FALL ON MY FACE in front of everyone.....I laughed it off...then came to speeches....they were great! Except I was hoping that since I got no vows, my FH would say some words.....nothing.....
So now onto our dance we’ve spent months in dance classes learning, we had it down in our sleep! We start it and he SKIPS a HUGE part and I’m telling him omg! We have to do this part! He said “no I got it,” and we didn’t do it, putting our steps off for everything....
then it comes to cut the cake....the BLACK cake. We cut it and it turns out... IT IS A GENDER REVEAL CAKE!!!! ITS A BOY!!!! Causing SO MUCH humiliation and SO MUCH confusion to our guests (no, never pregnant!) thennnn my FH gets BLACK ICING on my WHITE DRESS, STEPS ON IT, it RIPs.....PLUS....not a single tier was the right flavor!!!
The end of night comes and the owner of the place tells us we have to clean up THAT NIGHT because there’s a new party in the am and if not done, we will forfeit our deposit, so we got it all cleaned up....
Get to the hotel, atleast we can have some good *** after everything! Take my dress off etc and enjoy our first night together.....NOPE!!! Nothing happened (not even a kiss) then the next morning I tell him we can make it up, and he said “later, we can wait 20min to sleep”......I was crushed.
So it was literally the worst day of my life.....we are supposed to leave for our loooong planned honeymoon tonight to Costa Rica, and I can’t speak to him or look at him without crying.....will I ever get over this!?
I told him everything with countless tears and he keeps apologizing but like, he ruined my day. He doesn’t understand why we just can’t have another one.....another wedding!?!
I dont think I’m going on this trip 💔💔💔
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