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Just Said Yes February 2018

My wedding was horrible how do i move on

Anonymous, on May 21, 2024 at 9:34 PM Posted in Married Life 0 9
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Everyone looks back on their wedding as this wonderful day I wish I could but can’t and it’s all because of my bridesmaids the very second they got there one decided to put out a whole bottle of wine right inside the church 3 of my bridesmaids end up completely drunk before the wedding even starts they insulted my husbands family they hit on my husband sisters husbands were loud and then they proceeded to blame their bad behavior on me saying that I was the one who told them to act like this and I certainly did not after the wedding was over we had my reception at a different location they were very late because they were so drunk they threw up in the pastors study and they were cleaning it up one of them just laid past out on a table the entire reception and one of my husbands groomsmen apologized to everyone about a year later I was a bridesmaid to one of the drunk bridesmaids all 3 apologized to me that day after they proceeded to make jokes like “well at least we stayed sober for this one” I know they’re sorry but how do I ever move on from this what I want more than anything is to redo my wedding and have another one but is it even possible to do that how do I forgive this I’m still friends with all of them which is why I’m choosing to remain anonymous and not name names but my 3 year anniversary is coming up and all I can think about is this what do I do?

9 Comments

Latest activity by Sarah, on June 4, 2024 at 10:02 PM
  • K
    Beginner April 2024
    Karen ·
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    I feel you. I eloped in cape may, nj on 4-26. My hair and makeup was stunning but our photographer was a no show and my dress wasnt what i wanted. I was going to post a similar post so at least you have people who feel ya
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  • Cece
    Rockstar October 2023
    Cece ·
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    If you think a redo will help you get over the initial wedding, why don’t you plan a five-year vow renewal celebration?!
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  • A
    Just Said Yes February 2018
    Anonymous ·
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    They do that?! What do you do at one?
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  • Andrea
    Rockstar January 2024
    Andrea ·
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    You’re a bigger person than I to still be friends with them when they’re still joking about it! I think a five-year vow renewal or anniversary party may help you get past the disappointment. I’d just have a very frank discussion with those three about their behavior — IF you choose to invite them!
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  • C
    CM ·
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    I would no longer be friends with any of them so I have no advice for getting over the resentment. Not only did they get so drunk, and behave so badly, they blamed it all on you and didn't even see fit to apologize for an entire year. I don't believe that people act so totally and completely out of character when drunk and their behavior since your wedding was equally bad in its own way. I'd be forgiving them in my own mind so that I no longer hold so much regret and anger, but from afar, not as a friend. There could never be any trust or respect after something like that.

    As for a redo, I'm not sure I believe that such a thing exists. Personally, I think a big event five years later is still a bit soon if you are intending to invite most of the same guests. An anniversary party at a major milestone like ten years could be nice but by five or ten years it's also possible you will have moved on and have other priorities in your life.

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  • V
    Champion July 2019
    Veronica ·
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    I wouldn't have remained friends with any of them especially after they joked about the wedding at another wedding. They don't actually sound sorry at at all for their behavior. In fact, they sound extremely immature and selfish. This would've been a friendship ending situation.

    If you want a redo of sorts, then a vow renewal is the only thing I can think of. Since you decided to stay friends with these girls (definitely not women with the way they acted) I wouldn't involved them at all in the vow renewal.

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  • Cece
    Rockstar October 2023
    Cece ·
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    A vow renewal celebration can be just like a wedding! You can wear the wedding dress, have an officiant repeat your vows (a lot of couples choose to have a friend or family member ordained and perform the ceremony. It’s more personable, and saves you the money of hiring an officiate). You can hire a videographer, have the wedding cake, the dinner, the dancing, everything!
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  • Rose
    Savvy August 2024
    Rose ·
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    I agree with most on this post. I would definitely not call that a friendship. It’s not like they ruined your birthday that was your wedding day! Absolutely not. I love the idea of a 5 yr anniversary celebration (without them).
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  • S
    March 2024
    Sarah ·
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    I wouldn't do a vow renewal. I recomend treating your anniversary like valintines day. It is a day to spend with your partner and let them know how much you care about them.
    When I grumbled about "ugg, the cleaners burnt my dress and the make up irretated my eyes and you tripped and hurt your knee" my husband said "guess what?" "what" "We're married"
    Don't think about your friends getting drunk, Think about your partner and how much you love them
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