Need Some Backup!!

I spent less than $100 dollars on flowers, but I bought enough roses for myself, the bridal party, grooms boutonniere, and possibly a toss bouquet. We are going to make the bouquets ourselves (DIY project). We got them from Global Roses. If you wouldn't mind a DIY project, I would skipping the florist and buying flowers online. If you would like a florist, I would look up the typical price of a florist and compare it to your price to convince your FH you got a good deal. Hope this helps!

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I thought about DIY flowers as well, but as soon as my FMIL and mom heard it, they were not happy about it haha. But yes, the florists in our area all charge well over $2k for just the basic packages, so I'm going to keep trying to convince him that this really was the best deal!

Thanks for the help!

I would show him the prices of all the places you discounted & never even showed him, so he can get an idea of exactly what things cost. Guys just have no clue. I printed out all the prices/quotes and put them them in a binder from most expensive to least expensive (even the ones that were so outrageously priced there was zero chance we were ever going to use them, just for comparison purposes). I put each quote under their proper tabs (ie, photography, videography, florals, etc. ) and then made an evening of it. We ordered Chinese food, sat down together & went through the binder. He was super impressed with all the work I had done, and really appreciated having everything laid out and organized for him to easily go through all at once. It made the planning process a lot more fun, and made him feel as though he had a voice in the choices that were being made. And, surprisingly, when he actually sat down and saw what each vendor had to offer and could compare their packages, he didn’t end up just choosing the cheapest options!

Omg!!!! That is an AMAZING quote!!!!!! I am looking at $3500 for All my flowers.
I understand the frustration as I, too, have the same man! Lol. It’s what they “do”¿ don’t do?
We have flowers for ceremony- outdoors 10/2/21 in upstate NY, 20 guest tables, sweetheart table, my 2 bouquets, 4 bouquets for bridal attendants on my side, 4 on his boutonnières with additional 2 for our respective sons- 2 for our dads- 2 for brothers( one of his is IN wedding) and ring bearer, flower fairy basket, corsages for my mom, stepmom & his mom, his “charming” 23yo daughter, his & my sister, my aunt who’s doing the hand fasting and a corsage for my uncle who’s marrying us. Then the additional cake table, gift table, memorial table, and a couple other places- as well as the 4 or 5 roses that will be on chairs for those we have lost: his grandparents, my grandparents, his dad and his younger brother. So tell him: “You are getting off VERY VERY easily with the flowers. And I am jealous! Lol” oh and “In the NY or VA floral market the prices varied vastly: $3500 for All of above mentioned in Upstate NY & $9850 in Northern VA! So it might seem like a lot and it is in ‘real life terms’ but in ‘wedding terms’ it isn’t!”

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I do have a spreadsheet made of the compared prices so I think I'll go with your plan and have a 'planning date night' with him! Thank you!!

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I know right!?! I had a couple of options to choose from at first because my FHs SIL sent me her wedding spreadsheet with the vendors they chose on it. I compared them with florists that worked with venues we looked at and even searched through friend's social media posts with their weddings to see who they went with. Ultimately, I found a sweet girl that has amazing talent but is also fresh on the scene. She's worked with a couple of venues we looked at, including the one we went with. I think we got super lucky because I was able to find someone that wasn't crazy with their prices due to being new BUT we aren't sacrificing on quality because she is AMAZING.

I'm spending $700 for all my flowers. I had a similar problem with my fh and his family so I told them all that if they think they could find cheaper with still good quality then they have the freedom to find the vendors. Once him and his parents tried to look for vendors for cheap that's when they all shut

Sorry I accidentally hit reply.


Shut up about it and let me do my thing. I guess that's what you can do, is have him try and find cheaper vendors.

View Quoted Comment He will come around. Book her. Put as much down on her now as you can, and then let it rest. Know you have that person done and move on to the next vendor.
Also, Facebook has wedding vendor pages for area of country you’re located in, or having wedding in. And some are multi-vendor type.

But floral averages( pre-Covid) $5000-$20000 for a 100-200 guest, 4 attendees wedding.

View Quoted Comment Good luck girl! I hope it works well for you too!

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That's what I told my mom when it came to food so she's fine with my choices now haha! But I think he'll come around. Thanks for the advice!

View Quoted Comment You're welcome and good luck.

If I have learned nothing else from my wedding, it is that DIY is not always best and is 1,000 times more stressful. If you have it in the budget, SPEND THE MONEY. $1,000 is INSANELY well-priced for that entire package- my bridesmaids bouquets and my bouquet alone are $350. But I can also say my FH did nothing for our wedding at all. Still a little frustrating 🙃 He didn’t even get the addresses for some of the people he wanted to invite, so eventually I just said screw it, then those people wouldn’t be invited if he couldn’t even get their addresses.

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I thought about the DIY idea, but I just don't want that added stress haha! But I feel you on the addresses issue. My FH took FOREVER to get his side of the family done, and we still don't have addresses for all of them or all of his friends! Thank goodness we aren't getting married until 1/22

First, $1k for florals is a very good price depending on size of your wedding party, number of guests, types of flowers, etc.

My husband was the same way. I think all guys (and some women) are with wedding planning. He has it in his head that the day is more for the bride so I should pick what I want. I want us both to have things we want. But anyways, I did a ton of research like you and picked my top people. His eyes popped out if his head at prices (Mass-Cape Cod very pricey) just like your FH he requested we keep looking for lower prices. I very calmly said “I’ve spent hours of research already so that’s fine if YOU want to keep looking and let me know what you come up with.” That was the first moment it dawned on him that I had been putting in all the time and effort into planning OUR day and he undermined that planning when he asked to keep looking. He was more helpful after that. This is also a great marriage tip in general, change the narrative to put the responsibility on both of you not just on you.

View Quoted Comment Oh my goodness, if your florist will lock you into that price for 2022, you better book her soon! I know you said she was new to the game, so most likely by 2022 her rates are going to be much higher.

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Thanks for the advice! He actually told me that if it's the best I found for the look we want, then to follow my gut and he trusts me, so that's nice. I think I'm going to ease him into the planning process by making the DJ his 'job' to find. All about give&take!

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That's what I thought too! Plus, she worked with me on getting her original quote down to within my budget, so she also gave us a VERY good discount to begin with! Def. booking her today. You all have been so helpful!

My FW was kinda like this so I “assigned” her things to do. She was in charge of finding a videographer and she did all the research. When she didn’t want to look for something (caterer, florist etc) I picked who I thought was best and said this is who we’re going with, and she’s been good with it. She trusts my judgement.

That is an amazing price. I got quoted about $780 (pre tax and tip) for all of my flowers: bouquets, boutonnières, corsages, ceremony space, reception decor, and our centerpieces are actually included in our venue’s package so they’re pretty much free because if we use that same florist she enhances the floral arrangements for the centerpieces. My FH was similar at first, he got really overwhelmed by how expensive everything is, but then he saw what we were getting and that we don’t have to pay it all upfront, and that helped a ton.