No Family Support!

@FiddlinBritt I'm definitely learning that. And my bridesmaids are my sisters. I don't need them to help, but would love for them to be involved as my sisters.

As hard as it is to hear...

No one will care about your wedding as much as you do. Yes, that includes family. They have lives too. Try to lower your expectations, because you are not entitled to their help, even if you've helped them in the past.

I'm not sure why your mom would have gone above and beyond (according to you) to help your sister but not you. Maybe when she helped plan her wedding she realized it was a ton of work and is not as enthusiastic about planning this time around?

Aww this is sad It sounds like there are some bigger family dynamics at play here, but it's obviously a bummer. I can totally understand why you'd be disappointed; part of what we all hope for in weddings is quality time with our families. Just try to focus on the fact that you are creating your own family, and do your best to make sure that family is tight and supportive.

Also, I 100% disagree that planning falls on the bride. Your FH isn't exempt because he has a penis.

My sister isn't involved because I know she has her own life. I text her every so often about wedding stuff, but I've rarely included her in planning. She just doesn't have as much time and interest as I do!

Lowering your expectations is a great idea!

I know it 's hard to hear, but no one really cares as much as you do. This is good to remember when you start putting together your guest list too......those last 100 guests?

It's date night for them. They could be anywhere.

Take the bull by the horns, plan it yourself and enjoy it.

Totally agree with Elphaba. Why would they start being supportive of you now?

It really sucks, but as PP have said no one is going to be as excited for your wedding as you are. Definitely lower your expectations of everyone. If they want to do something for you they will bring it up themselves. Go along with planning, you only have 4.5 months left, and throw a bomb ass wedding yourself. If they regret not taking this time with you, that's on them!

Thanks for the feedback..

I've got two brothers who is very passive/not interested in my engagement/wedding.

I've got a sister who just cares if she's a bridesmaid or not.

And then I've got a sister who sends me every wedding-related thing under the sun.

And then I've got another sister who is happy for FH and I, but hasn't said much outside of that.

You can't control how people respond/act.

You can't expect someone to return the same devotion you did, regardless if they're blood or not.

And you need to remember that no one is going to care about your wedding as much as you do.

Also, you say they've never been interested in your life or supportive of your successes, so I'm not sure I understand your surprise.

I get it's your wedding and they're family, but it sounds like this is typical behavior of them, as disappointing as that is; I am sorry to hear that's how they treat you.

People will keep telling you it's no required but this is a moment you dream about as a little girl...it's disheartening when loved ones seem to not care! Is your FH helping? Sorry you have to go through the it alone!

And I'm sorry people keep mentioning brothers, why would they care? lol I think that's totally different from a s sister/mother..

FH and I have done the planning mostly on our own too, our family and friends all live in different states and it's not feasible to do wedding things with others. Instead of wallowing in "why doesn't anyone want to help," embrace the fact that this event will be completely your and FH's style. Also, I've noticed that if people get a little distant, it's usually because I've been talking wedding too much and need to dial it back. Be excited, but don't force excitement out of others.

I've been engaged for nearly a year, and my sister has still not congratulated me or expressed any interest/excitement. But, I recognize that this dynamic spans beyond my wedding. Although I am not surprised by her actions, as they are consistent with past behaviors, it still hurts so I get it.

I totally understand and agree. My family couldn't be less interested, and I've done everything myself. I honestly wonder why we're spending so much to celebrate with people who aren't interested. The important thing is that we're marrying each other, but we could've done that without them and taken a fantastic vacation.

This is why I'm choosing A court House wedding I don't care alot about spending money on people who could careless. Which means more money.. For A honey moon.

Girly!! Ditto - but my mom and new wealthy stepfather are fully financing but are not helping whatsoever with logistics and planning. Planning an event of such significance and size shouldn't be a one-woman show!!! It is a huge limitation, especially since I'm a younger bride (24). Note, I went to university for arts/entertainment management and had upper-level courses on event management and planning; however, I'm finding it extremely difficult to plan when I'm the only one with an actual understanding of the ideal planning process… It takes a group to plan an event of this size. I'm also the first in my family to have an actual wedding, so idk. I think my mom and older sister might hold some jealousy Im afraid. For example, when I FaceTimed my sister to tell her I was engaged, she was visibly uninterested and didn't congratulate me until she hung up. I think my mom is jealous because although she's remarried to a wealthy person, she's never had a full-blown traditional wedding for her new husband or my father and is naturally living vicariously through me at the moment, and not to brag.... i think my ring is wayyyyyyy better and my fiance grew up in poverty and shes very classist unfortunately. idk

I agree with you regarding the poster, but this is a very relative dynamic, in my opinion. I think it has to do a lot with age. Like imagine getting married in your early 20s with no tangible support from anyone else....I'm going through that now, and it sucks...especially with a highly demanding full-time job. I know what needs to be done, but I simply don't have enough hands or time.