No-host bachelorette party???

I’ve never been to a bachelorette where the host paid for the actual event. Usually whoever is attending chips in for community things like a hotel or Airbnb, a ride share, etc. Then each guest pays for their own food, alcohol, event tickets, etc. The host(s) have just paid for decor or any games.

We did ours exactly how Catylyn describes. My host only paid for decor themselves and organized. Everyone split evenly costs for the hotel, Ubers etc

View Quoted Comment Thanks!! Is that just what the guests expect or do you have to specify on the invitation? It’s been so long since most of us have been to a wedding bachelorette party because we’re all in our 50s or older!

View Quoted Comment Thanks!!! I’m glad to hear that’s the norm.

The invitation should come from whoever is organizing it (hopefully, not you), and they can just specify, "We hope you can join us to celebrate Amy before her big day! If you'd like to join us for a no-host dinner at _____, with dancing and fun to follow, RSVP to _____ by ____." If they are planning something that will require advanced paid reservations or tickets, the host can just add something like, "Contact _____ by _____ so she can place your ticket order/room deposit/whatever." As much as you can, I'd try to stay out of the arrangements! Congrats!

View Quoted Comment That’s perfect - thanks! They are organizing but asked me how to handle.

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Awesome! Sounds like you have good friends! Hope you have a blast!

I agree with what everyone said usually someone does the inviting and says we're planning this it'll cost around X let me know if you can come !

View Quoted Comment Thanks so much!

View Quoted Comment They’re the best - thanks!

View Quoted Comment I’ve never seen it listed on the invitation, but I’ve honestly never received a paper invitation for a bach. Maybe that’s a generational thing though!

View Quoted Comment It will probably be an evite or just an email. We’re doing our save the dates and invitations on PaperlessPost but I’m not sure what my friends will do. I’ll leave that part to them! Thanks again.😊

Like pp said it’s whomever decides to go that they chip in. You could even do something small like a hangout together

The biggest key to costs is the duration of the party. The traditional afternoon or evening out, up to 4 hours, usually means people going to their own homes at night. Not paying for extensive travel to get there. And when doing something like a barbecue or bonfire at the lake or other similar setting, controlling liquor costs. People do not mind paying their own way , with hosts splitting the cost of an venue charge ( if there is one) and splitting the bride's costs, untill it hits more than they usually spend for an evening out. At $7-$10 a drink, people who want to keep their own costs down to 3 drinks, appetizers, can do it for 3-4 hours. But much over that, people have usually lost judgement, and start losing track of drinks, ordering unwisely, and needing $125-200 hotel or motel rooms. In my experience, people only start grumbling about hosts then. Word as suggested above. But there is one change I would suggest: if tickets to something are involved, don't just say, we need to reserve them . That does not say who is paying. Say, although each participant will need to pay the $20 admission ticket, we need to reserve enough tickets in advance for the group, so let us know by ..... Because some parties hosts pay for the admissions, and this time it needs to be clear. I have been on a few party boats, and to comedy shows, where at least half the group thought the hosts reserving tickets, meant hosts paying. What a mess , and lots of bad feelings at the last minute. So party planners must be clear.

I think it's pretty standard for guests to contribute. I'd just tell her to pick something affordable. One of our friends is getting married in May (eloping then having a small reception) and doesn't have a wedding party, but I knew she was hoping for some kind of bachelorette locally before her big day. I just texted all her friends and invited them to a local bar/crafting place and dinner after (more the bride's speed) and let everyone know in advance. I paid for the bride but everyone else paid for themselves.

View Quoted Comment Thanks! I think she is thinking something small like wine tasting at a local tasting room, which isn’t crazy expensive. I appreciate the advice.

View Quoted Comment This is really helpful - thanks!!

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Yeah I'd just send out a group text or email or Facebook invite and let everyone know where & when & the cost. I don't think that would offend anyone or confuse them!

I've never been to a Bachelorette party or even heard of one where the host foots the bill. Normally whoever is attending pays for their own stuff and puts their half in for limo, hotels etc. For my bachelorette party everyone going knows they need to pay for their own stuff plus chip in their half of the money for the limo.

When the bride or groom host a bachelorette party, it is usually expecting to be a fully hosted event. Essentially, they are having a party to celebrate for themselves, their wedding. Not by someone's else in their honor. So like any party a person hosts for themself, they make the plans, and they pay the full bill. Totally their responsibility. Where when others give it in the B or G honor, either a small group decides to offer a fully hosted event, paying everything. Or everyone participating pays for themselves and a share of the B or G costs. Only the guest of honor is treated. But those paying for themselves have input into the event. It is not a case of bride saying, I want this, and others providing it. The larger groups may plan by designating a small number to start planning, but all in the group have input.