Non-legal Ceremony and Officiant Details

Op, if your FH brought this up to you, this would make me think that he's really not ready to get married. There's no way I would ever fake a wedding. Why would you get married later if everyone already thinks you are? What if something happened and you never ended up getting married? I would be carefully evaluating my relationship and making sure this isn't cold feet in disguise. Unlike others that you state, you CAN get married - someone or both of you are choosing not to for what sounds like some bogus reason.

After all of your responses I still don't get the point of lying to people. People who previously weren't legally allowed to get married didn't lie. When my cousin had her commitment ceremony she told people that's what it was because back then it was illegal for her to marry her SO.

If you are avoiding legality for financial reasons then you should not be having a "wedding". It sounds like one of you is avoiding something serious.

On my end we got legally married for insurance purposes and will have our big wedding celebration in the fall. We didn't lie. We told everyone and everyone understands and is still excited for us. They would have been mad if we would have lied. In Cuba where his family is from this is actually the tradition to do the legal with the state part and then the actual ceremony in front of friends later on.

It just doesn't make sense to do it the other way around no matter how you try to twist it. It's deceitful.

I just had a friend tell me they were going to do this...wants to have a "wedding ceremony" celebration but actually stay single for the certain benefits. I just gave her the biggest side eye...sounds real gift grabby in my opinion. If you are not ready to marry now, I would personally wait, especially reading all of these comments.

Sounds kind of bogus to me.

Not sure where your at or if you have completed your ceremony but I am a pastor and might be open to helping you if details can be worked out.

Do you you want. Don’t listen to these judgy peole. They don’t know you. Only you know what is right for you.

It's your wedding and your relationship, do what makes you and your fiance happiest! Whether you get the government involved in your union is your business, not your guests.


I imagine that your friends and family are more interested in you and your fiance's happiness than how you file your taxes.