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Savvy August 2019

Non-religious Ceremony and Vows?

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Mrs.a.brown, on July 9, 2019 at 2:36 AM

So, for a short backstory, my FH and I have been together for over 10yrs. We are for the most part, Agnostic and we respect others beliefs and traditions, but do not follow the same roads as them. Our families are half-and-half when it comes to religion and 98% do not care what our beliefs are. My issue right now is putting together a script for the ceremony. We don't want it to be religious and we don't really want to do vows. I'm looking for ideas for the welcoming/opening and possible readings/poems. I want to keep it under 20 minutes, but I also feel like anything over 10 minutes is to long. I'm sure I wont notice the time, but since I have 1 month left till the wedding, I feel pretty stressed on this part. I'm open to ideas/suggestions. Thanks!!

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23 Comments

Savvy July 2020
Ashley · on July 11, 2019 at 2:06 PM
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Both my fiance and I are non-religious, so we weren't going to have a religious ceremony. I never thought of looking into other readings or poems. I guess I will have to look into that.
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Expert October 2020
Natalia · on July 11, 2019 at 5:32 PM
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I think yours is a fantastic idea. Something written from the heart, it does not have to be vows, but maybe a letter. You don't even have to exchange them in front of people!
My FH and I are Pagans. Therefore we are going to have a handfasting ceremony. A handfasting is literally "tying the knt," so you can look into that also! It does not have to be religious, in the slightest.
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Expert February 2020
Kristal · on July 12, 2019 at 10:08 AM
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A really good way is to have them start with a definition of love, maybe from a quote or something similar that reflects your/your FH's definition there of. Add in maybe a bit of your love story (how you met, etc.). Add some poems found online if you wish and then finish out with your required things. (Every state usually has something specific that has to be said.) Should be able to have a short, sweet & simple ceremony and be in & out in 30-45 minutes. Most officiants will have plenty of material and be able to steer you in the right direction. Finding one you can trust in is key to the whole process.
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