Not using a Venue

I think it sounds ideally really nice because you can have control of what you want and what not but you would need a ton of rentals! And that might end up costing you a lot altogether vs just going with a venue that has everything

A good friend of ours had their wedding at their parents backyard. It was a decent size around 160 people. His wife was telling me they still spent close to $14,000. Keep in mind, the prices in Rhode Island where we live are extremely high for weddings. Probably some of the highest in the country. Also their backyard was really decked out. The place looked like it could be an actual wedding venue. I’m sure that you can definitely cut costs significantly and depending on where you live I’m sure your prices aren’t as outrageous as they are here, but you have to keep certain factors in mind like planning for rain, if you plan on getting DJ or decor you have to make sure you have enough lighting outlets and a good power supply to keep the food warm for the caterers and things like that. If you want to have more of a laid-back wedding I’m sure you can save a lot. Good luck

The most difficult part of using a private property is that you have to bring in every single item. But most rental companies will be able to supply everything you need (ie. tables, chairs, linens, decor etc). Then your catering can provide the food, including the plates and silverware. One of the other issues with such properties and 200 guests will be the amount of bathrooms. These days, they rent the nice style Porta-pottys that come with a sink inside and don’t look or function like the basic type at a construction site. 200 is a lot of guests, so having ample space is always necessary to avoid a cramped elbow-to-elbow feeling. You’ll need designated areas for the ceremony, cocktail hour and reception for 200 guests and these areas should have an easy flow from one space to the next.

It can be done for a fraction of the price but you will have to get creative. Make a list of the most important things to both of you and skip the rest.

Take advantage of the the vendor tab at the top of the page for price-comparing of rental companies. Have your favorite restaurant cater instead of an expensive wedding caterer. Go with a grocery store wedding cake. Check out Costco or fiftyflowers.com for florals. Browse the Dollar Tree for glass items and anything else that catches your eye. Costco also has frozen appetizers, fruit/veggie platters for cocktail hour, alcohol that can be returned unopened, and heavy duty plastic silverware and napkins/plates. Stock up on clear Christmas lights that can be used for decoration anywhere and are very bright at night.

I think the hardest part is renting everything including bathrooms. And parking...I played violin at a wedding where the neighbors were calling police bc ppl were parking in front of their houses. Ppl were leaving and driving around in circles, I don’t even know where they ended up parking.

Search this forum for "Backyard wedding BAM" and "Backyard wedding budget." You'll read TONS of feedback from real brides who've actually done it. Generally, one of the most common themes I've read is that a large backyard wedding does not typically cost less than a comparable wedding at a mostly inclusive venue, and they typically involve a LOT of work and coordination. Most brides who've successfully done it say it was worth it because getting married on the family property was super important to them (like your husband), but they will also warn not to do it because a couple thinks it will save a ton of money. After reading a large cross-section of posts, your best bet is to brainstorm a detailed list of everything you'll need (as mentioned by pps, some items will include: chairs, tables, table settings, linens, restrooms, potentially tents or other shelters from bad weather, possibly fans/heaters/AC, you might need to spray for bugs in the weeks prior, lighting, possible extra electrical service to support lights/DJ/etc., catering and catering facilities [refrigeration, keeping food hot, etc.], a dance floor, adequate parking, etc., etc., etc.) -- the list will become crazy long, so it's important to do your research so you're not surprised later by things you never thought of. Once you have a pretty good list, you can start contacting vendors to get cost estimates (don't forget tax, delivery, set-up/take-down, etc.) so you can build a realistic budget. And, finally, don't underestimate the time and energy required to plan and coordinate everything, there will be tons of details and many of them with need to be executed at the last minute under a tight timetable, most brides happy with their backyard experience highly valued a paid professional wedding planner or at least an AWESOME day-of coordinator.

If it's what you truly want, I hope you and FH can make it happen -- I'd just encourage you to do your research so you're well-informed about what all you're taking on. Good luck!

We just had our wedding on my parents farm last weekend. Our original plan was to do the ceremony on the farm and the reception at a venue near by because there wasn’t a great place to seat 200 people, and the venue we found has a pavilion in case of rain-renting tents big enough to cover everything wasn’t that much cheaper than renting a venue. We ended up cutting our list to just 26 because of COVID, so we did it all on the farm, and I’m so glad we did.


The cheaper cost comes with work though. I was outside working everyday for the 2 weeks leading up to the wedding weeding flower beds, mowing the lawn, pressure washing, and general clean up around the farm. The biggest thing I hadn’t thought about was the clean up afterwards. You’re typically responsible for clean up at a venue as well, but because you’re having to bring in more things that a venue would often provide, there’s that much more to clean up. We stopped by yesterday after getting back from our honeymoon, and there were still miscellaneous things all over the place. Garbage can was already full again because of all the garbage we produced between rehearsal Friday and wedding Saturday.
I highly recommend though. It was way more special to have it at a place that was meaningful to us, and we could do things the way we wanted since it was my parents property.

My sister-in-law had her wedding at her house with approximately 50 people. She said she spent about the same as she would have if she would have had it at a traditional wedding venue. Venues often provide so many things that you would now be responsible for handling. Some things you will definitely need to take into consideration is parking, bathrooms, and bad weather. You will need to make sure that there is enough parking for all of your guests. Two hundred people would mean that you would need multiple bathrooms available so guests would either be using the bathrooms inside or you'd have to rent portable bathrooms. You'd also need a plan in place in case of bad weather. About half way through my sister-in-law's wedding it started downpouring. Everyone had to run under the tents set up. She was out in the rain and her dress got ruined. The dance floor was covered in water and ended up not being used. There are honestly a ton of other things to take into consideration as well.

View Quoted Comment I hadn’t even thought of that! Oh my

Backyard weddings can cost as much as a venue and come with more headache. You’ll need to rent a lot of the un-fun stuff like lighting, tents, generator for electrical or music needs, bathrooms, possibly a tent unless the weather is perfect, tables & chairs (although not all venues provide tables & chairs). Get rental quotes and work a budget before you commit to this.

View Quoted Comment

Definitely agree. Plus liability and insurance cost a lot more.