Older people at wedding

No, ma'am. Not close to grandparents at all. My FH's parents are in their 70s and unfortunately they really want to come. I wanted to elope without any guests but FH says his parents need to be there.

So they will be there and now I have to make several modifications such as an outdoor ceremony instead of inside a courthouse.

Yes. My grandparents are 92 and I am very close with them. My grandma has been pretty vocal about her concern for postponing the wedding

No, the day is about two people joining in a deep union of marriage 💕 They had their wedding and life, they do not care lol so glad mine did not attend. I love them and they love me, but did not think twice of them not being there... and it was beyond perfect 🤍🤍🤍🤍
But if it’s going to bother you, then of course, be mindful and assure they can attend with lots of modifications.

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My nana is 90 and I'm very close with her. She always jokes that she is going to hit 120, but you know, it still is a concern of mine.

We postponed from October 2020 to October 2021, it's crossed my mind, but I hate to say I'm not overly sad about it. I don't have much of a relationship with my dad's grandparents, probably met with 5 times in 31 years. From the start of wedding planning, I knew they wouldn't come because of age (85+ for both) and health issues and another year adds to that. I am a little closer to my grandma on my mom's side, by closer I mean I have met her more than 5 times. She is older, close in age to my dad's parents, and is very cautious of all things COVID, if she is still with us next October, who knows if she'll even come. My fiancé thinks I'm crazy for not having much of a relationship with either set of grandparents, as his all passed before he was born sort shortly after with the exception of his grandma who passed a couple years before I met him. He was very close to her.

When there’s a will, there is always a way.

Two years before my second wedding, My sister who had planned their wedding for right after law school and 2 first cousins on mom's side planning for 2 - 3 years in advance, all made their weddings 2 years earlier. Grampa with kidney cancer, Grandma then had Pancreatic diagnosed. So they jumped earlier, lots of help planning. Grampa missed one due to pulmonary clots ( hospitalized), One after stubbing his toe and ripping a nail that morning, one because he felt Grumpy, did not want extra people around. Grampa lived 4 more years. Grandma had the Flu for one, 3 weeks later was all dressed up to go to her grandson's wedding, had a heart attack, and died. Only my sister was glad she moved her date. They never got to hers, but she realized she had hardly spent any time with them since she started law school, so soon as she heard she started coming home to Grandma's ( next door) and spent 15 weeks, seeing more of her than in years. And Dad's mom grandma lived a few hundred yards from where Grampa lived with our first cousins. So she spent time with him every visit, usually when Gran fell asleep at 7 pm. Grampa was a night owl, play cards til 2 am.
My sister said it is too bad she messed up her wedding, as other people could not make it because of the change being mid year when they were in Europe, or west coast college. Neither G nor G made it. My 2 cousin's brides were furious they skipped nicer weddings to marry in a hurry. Both were glad they spent extra time with Grampa, for the next 4 years. ... When this came up 2 years later with a beloved uncle, the trio who moved their dates before, advised those of us planning, not to do it sooner. Just make more time for them now. Weddings are not most of life. Everyday life, shared many more hours mattered more than the weddings ( that they never did get to anyway. When Mom's Dad grampa did not die soon as predicted, he asked for a family reunion weekend, in town, so he would get to see everyone. It was awesome. And for the reunion, some people in the family travelled from Europe, Canada, Greenland for a week or two. But the next two years before he did die, he had mail and calls of visits from any of hos 6 kids, 50+ grandchildren, and scads of great grandchildren. 🙂 All by way of saying , don't put it all on the wedding. If they miss that day, they miss it. 10-20 extra visits over 2 last years of life may mean more. And if you move wedding planning up, you have less time for that relative because you are always busy, with wedding stuff. Catch 22!

We moved our wedding from October to April. My grandmother, who was 96 and in great health until recently, passed on two months ago. She and I were very close and her being at my wedding was one of the things I was most looking forward to.

When we decided to move the wedding, it had occurred to me something might happen between October and April. But our wedding was/is across the country, we had no plans, desire, or really ability to change it to be local, so our choice was go ahead with October or postpone. And I didn't want to put her at undue risk either, so what can you do? These are difficult times, and it's hard to predict anything (yes, even to the people who said to me - on the day she passed - "too bad you didn't have your wedding earlier". Thanks, that is so helpful.)

We have older guests on the guestlist but they're still in good health so we're not concerned.

All of my grandparents are dead, and he barely has a relationship with his, so we’re not worried about it at all, even when we have our vow renewal in 2022. We’re eloping next month with just immediate family, we’re not that concerned about anyone else being present in 2022.

Yes, we were concerned about postponing for the same reason. In the end, we realized that since our venue is a destination, there was no chance any of our older family members being able to attend now, so postponing actually increases the odds they can be there.

NO!!! my grandmothers are in their 70's and they both went out to vote in person and Ryan's 92 year old grandmother went out to vote in person as well. they wore masks and bundled up... they will come to our wedding no matter what.. HIS grandmother wants us married sooner incase she dies of old age!! LOL.

Yes!! I recently made the decision to move my wedding from 1.2.21 to 6.26.21 and it freaks me out to think that my 80-year-old grandmother and father could potentially not be there to experience it with me. Such a huge fear of mine but I keep trying to stay calm and not overthink it.

View Quoted Comment Same!!!! It’s a crazy chess game we’re playing! I really try to stay calm as best as I can!

I have this concern with my grandfather actually he's only just hit his 70s but he doesn't take care of himself n has already had 4 major heart surgeries. So it's possible we could lose him in the next coming years

Yes and unfortunately my husband lost his grandpa 2 months before our wedding.