On what anniversary do people tend to plan vow renewals?

I agree with MrsA2B. You sound like you're just wanting a party so your friends who didn't make it can show up. That's totally cool but you should do it like a regular house party (i.e. no venue, no white dress, officiant, and unnecessary wasting of money). I think that saying a 10 yr anniversary is insignifcant is a bit much, as all of those things depend on context. People who haven't had stable relationships modeled for them may think 10 years is like 100 years whereas people with grandparents being together 50+ years may think thats normal.

I have friend who is planning a 10 year vow renewal because she and her wife were married in the court house and had only a handful of people there. She never got a dress or the big show and she wants it. I'll be ready to show up with bells on when she does.

I think it's not very common to have vow renewals, but I know a lady that is having one for her 15 year anniversary. It's usually the big anniversaries. I think having anniversary parties is kind of more common; FH's grandparents had one for their 50th anniversary.

Most vow renewals I've been invited to have been for 10 or 15 year couples. Dh and I want to do a vow renewal - just the two of us in Paris when the time comes. Usually, they are smaller gatherings - must smaller than the wedding.

If you're planning a huge party around the vow renewal, then yeah, the earlier years might be a little ridiculous, but if it's just the two of you and you don't make a "thing" of it, then do it as many times as you want. There shouldn't be a standard of time that's "acceptable" to make new promises to each other.

Ask a simple question and people are rude as Sh*t. Wedding Wire, you need to get a handle on this. No one wants those attitudes, ladies. I don't need your judgement either. If I want to have a party to celebrate my marriage with those who couldn't make it, so what? I definitely won't be calling it a "vow renewal" now.

You asked for opinions - you got them.

Nobody was rude. Blunt, perhaps.

I've never known vow renewals to be a common thing where I'm from. Occasionally after a really rough time (separation, family tragedy) but anniversary parties for milestones (normally 10, 25 and 50) are far more common.

Yeah, I don't understand vow renewals - unless you have expiration dates on your vows.

Anniversary parties, however, can be fun - but really, I think it's odd if it's anything less than 25 years. I think people should definitely celebrate their anniversaries, but not necessarily publicly until a true milestone has been achieved. Otherwise everyone would be going to anniversary parties ALL THE TIME.

And OP - no one was rude. They stated their opinion.

I think what she found rude was people continuing to tell her how wrong she is after she commented 3 times that she was taking the advice to not do it.

ETA: which is not necessarily rude, but certainly off-putting.

1 year is DEF too soon. My parents just had a vow renewal for their 30th anniversary in the Dominican Republic. I think 20-30 years is appropriate.

A year is way too soon unless you eloped first time around. Why would you even want to pay for two weddings two years in a row? I'd wait at least 5 - 10.

Just read your last comment. Then you'd call it an anniversary party.

First of all you need to calm down because all of us are calm and just giving you responses. Sounds like you should have an anniversary party. I've only heard of vow renewals for 5,10,20,25 and 50 years. My grandparents just did their 50th vow renewal. Anniversary party is cheaper also.

My great-grandparents, now departed, renewed their vows for their 60th anniversary, at my aunt's wedding. It was so sweet! I wouldn't do it so soon, even in 20 years seems too close.

I've done milestone years, but also after milestone events; illness, successful counseling, triumph over crises.

No one was rude as shit except you in that last comment,

Just have a party since that's what you want here.

I think an anniversary party is a better idea.

Good gracious. I'm sorry you got upset, but I don't think anyone was rude. This is an internet forum, so you are always going to get mixed and honest reviews. I've seen rude and this ain't it.

As a different opinion, I'm going to have a 1 year vow renewal. But my reasoning is different from yours. My wedding was guest and family focused and ultimately not really about us but them. So we are having a just us vow renewal at 1 year. No guests. So it isn't really the same as what you are saying.

If I just wanted to party or see my friends, I'd do something else. If you have a video. Maybe a anniversary party and video showing.

One of my friends had a vow renewal after 15 years and then her husband left her for his pregnant mistress the same year...so I don't really get the concept of the vow renewal. i like the anniversary party idea too. That's what my other friend is doing who got married at the courthouse the week before her husband was deployed. They will be having a big anniversary party for their first anniversary.

I see you've changed your mind to an anniversary party - good choice.

Your attitude though.. yikes. No one was rude. Wedding wire doesn't need to "get a handle on this" as it is an open forum on the internet.

We waited 25 years to be able to get legally married, and were thrilled that we actually had our wedding on our 25th anniversary as a couple. We were just talking about it earlier today, and we both would like to do a very small, private vow renewal every year. No big party or guests, no officiant, just the two of us celebrating our marriage and anniversary in a special way that's meaningful to us. Even though we were just married less than 2 weeks ago, I'm really excited about it.