Our friend booked our wedding date!

You are certainly entitled to your feelings, and I can definitely understand feeling annoyed by this situation, but feeling if you're feeling betrayed I think you might be taking this more personally than it really is. Maybe that date has sentimental meaning to them. Maybe it was the only date available at their desired venue (as you acknowledged, 2022 dates are slim pickings!). Maybe this was the date that worked best for the key people in their lives like parents, siblings, wedding party, etc. September is one of the most popular wedding months; you are right that your date is your day, but that doesn't preclude it from being any one else's. It really stinks you'll have guests that may have to choose, but the reality is that you'll have guests with other conflicts that day, too. The only recommendation I have is just to keep processing your feelings and hopefully make your peace with it soon, otherwise you'll have a pretty unhappy wedding planning experience. You did nothing wrong, they did nothing wrong, and hopefully everyone can find happiness for each other.

There's really nothing you can do other then just continue on. There's not a single date that will work for everyone. Like others have mentioned, maybe this dated worked best for the most important people in their lives, maybe it has sentimental value, maybe it was just the day the venue had open. Be excited for you and be excited for her.

Thank you, we are excited for them! We just wish we could enjoy each others days together. We know there isn't much we can do, so I even offered to help her with planning since I have most of ours is done and it's just something I enjoy! About all we can do now, enjoy each others celebrations leading up to the big days since we won't be at each others.

Thank you, we are excited for them! We just wish we could enjoy each others days together. We know there isn't much we can do, so I even offered to help her with planning since I have most of ours is done and it's just something I enjoy! About all we can do now, enjoy each others celebrations leading up to the big days since we won't be at each others.

"guilty", "selfish", and "betrayed" are all such loaded words and I think carry far more emotional weight than this situation deserves. You know yourself how much goes into picking a wedding date (venue availability, special anniversaries, VIP schedules, etc.). I would definitely not assume malice or worry about those ~20 overlapping guests.

You have a long way to go before your wedding and if you spend this much energy on something out of your control, you are going to burn out.