My original idea of handling my wedding was to have all total hired hands, from invitations all the way thru to the thank you cards...Well it didnt turn out that way disappointed goodness no it was the best beautiful challenge that not only fell in my lap but worth every mind boggling moment...I am a very picky individual including usually dont get help when I really really need it so aware when finally accepted my husband's hand that I had my work cut out for me...So 1st did many brainstorming sessions...what was the least easiest task(s) to handle 1st then advanced to the next...well believe it or not it was my wedding dress...I have been officially engaged for 5 years before we got married...my slickster husband didnt do a traditional down on one knee proposal...he sweetly placed the ring box on the nightstand in our hotel room where we were attending our annual convention in Lake Havasu City, AZ which is also where we wed on February 29, 2020...The ring was presented on Valentine's Day (February 14, 2015)...Well since then I noticed in many conversations he kept saying "my wife", me in denial was overlooking it would laugh and shift conversations on to something else...Well December 2017 changed that a simple work incident help accept the reality 100% I was so nervous and happy...I went to work which was Toys R Us before they closed and was brainstorming the whole night and forward which task to do 1st...picking out a dress was the front runner...I actually bought 2 dresses...my 1st dress was purchased at 2B Bridal Boutique in Toledo, OH...I bought right off the rack...I did it because 3 days before saw a news story of brides who could not get their dresses because the boutique closed so that really scared me luckily David's Bridal and a few other bridal salons broadcast brides could come to them to pick out another dress and accessories...The brides whose big day were literally days or barely 2 weeks away were the ones who really startled me the most...That was the fire under my bum to kickstart my thoughts ...Then being newly hired at a convention center helped me get introduced to wedding shows...in 2018 I attended 10 wedding shows seems like a lot but well worth the time and effort...At the wedding shows ANY idea, vision, thought, question you may have from lingerie types, photobooth, health & beauty, cleaning jewelry, to swing chairs set up away from the reception to help meditate and keep yourself from getting overwhelmed...I had 2 years to plan so I had more than enough time to change my mind, critique my plans and ideas etc etc....Thru attending this shows I came across Lavender Bridal pop-up store...since my 1st time attending I barely got 25% thru the show so I scurried to the back to see what was there and came across this...A pop-up is a mobile store...They had dresses & accessories you could try on or hold up against you to see if you liked...the ideal dress that caught my eye was a Maggie Soterro...I was able to come back the next day make an appointment to come into the salon...I went unfortunately the ideal dress I thought was it was not it...beautiful dress but just wasnt me...The bridal specialist I had studied me really close she went to get 4 choices my choice was actually #2 yet I still tried on the last 2 just because...that was January 2018...I was able to pay to have the dress held til time to order it ...when came time to order the dress in 2019 in time for our wedding in February 2020 I didnt change my mind...I still felt and have the love since tried it on...My ideal dress turned out to be a Stella York beautiful beading and pearls yet not to much..I am feminine yet like to be rugged at the same time I am an arts and environmental major - dont mind getting dirty...I am short so when came to additional alterations discovered during the final fitting a simple cremlin helped save me $550- needed to raise the dress 2" ..my alteration bill was definitely slashed in more than half spent approximately $100 on total alterations had a bussle added and they took in the sides...I shopped for the buttons to go on for the bussle...a good seamstress willing to work with you will make life a lot easier for you...effective communication is key...Unfortunately I didnt have much help 1 because my main go tos lived out of state my 2 friends for over 20 years helped get my cake, helped shop, push me in and out the door for my rehearsal dinner, decorate when got into Lake Havasu yet my biggest advantage I am a high detail orientated nut...so if something isnt turned right it will bother me and it is what helped me get through the lovely tedious tasks of prepping for the wedding...Ask questions no question is stupid...I give many many thank yous to Hobby Lobby I was a lil set back due to many people and customer views that turned out to me to be just personal views because I am the type that ask a lot of questions and if I dont know and not satisfied with an answer I keep asking til I get the answer that is suffice and effective for me to proceed with the new task I am trying to conquer...I never knew how to use modge podge until my wedding the associate gave her idea of some items that at first seem way far from my thought but when she actually went to every row got all items and explained...it all made sense to me and I saved $2500 on decorations...In pictures you will see hearts I did those painted and glitter...through my brainstorming I had created my theme of simple and elegant so really keeping in mind it was just me doing the bulk I wanted to trim as much stress as possible...I will strongly suggest the moment you accept your engagement and want to be the do it yourselfer start your planning process it helps because you will change your mind on things and its normal...I changed my mind which was helpful...I was able to trim down my details...I made a lot of samples to see what I was trying to do and at that time I could see it started to look junky so I was able to ponder what to take out and what to keep...KEEP A NOTEBOOK...date and write down EVERY idea, vision, you get...highlight your dates to help you retract if you need to go back to lookup something...true you maybe great at remembering but when it comes to your wedding you are going to forget because your mind will be on overload with happiness you are getting married, happy visions of seeing your spouse or mate, yet still working 30, 40, 50 60 hours a week, phone calls to venues, cake shop, bridal salon, bridal shower, bachloerette party, guest list, guests who dont like each other, guests who dont like parks, guests who dont like eggs, guests who are vegan, guests who are on keto, guests who dont like this or dont like that, is it day or is it night, did I eat today, did I workout today definitely high overload...So please keep a notebook...Look for closeouts Pat Catan's unfortunately has closed yet during their closeout period I bought pratically all my wedding decorations and what nots and save for future use at these closeout sales...Bags, lights, paints, flowers, arches, pre-wedding gifts...Yes I hosted my own pre-wedding party again picky and wanted to make sure no one was left out and if they were I know why I did it...so seek closeouts which leads back to why brainstorm...those brainstorms will be in your forefront mind at all times so when you see a closeout sale somewhere you will know right away what you can look for, get it and its marked off the list...As a crafty person I also saved really big as well...growing up as a child my mother made my brother and I go to the art museum every saturday and draw something from the museum...she didnt care what it was only rule was it was be close to what we saw color in all...then thru school I earned both an associate of arts & certificate in general science in which now I have gone back to advance both in bachelors thru a dual degree program...I have broken newly into my business venture of photography...utilizing my own photography work I created backdrops as an activity at our reception...I believe in keeping people busy...I like to keep people busy talking, snapping pictures, dancing, eating, playing games all positive activity to keep awake...Utilize pinterest and wedding wire both from my view great positive drama free social medium to research and discover answers to your wedding questions like wedding bouquets, should I wear pantyhose, what hairstyle should I do, what color should my bridal be, do I want a bridal party...For us my husband opted not to have bridal or groom parties...I had a bridal party where my ladies still helped me after letting them know they were not walking down the aisle...I was happy he made that decision because one had tunnel vision but I wanted to make sure he was included in the process and planning stages and two it help cut a lot of friction...I didnt want a bachelorette party...as the main spotlight person I did not want anything messed up since I was the "it" person beside the wedding planner who was wonderful...our talents together demonstrated effective communication...so I didnt want to be tipsy the next day or any day knowing I had work to do...I let the ladies drink for me...They were my support crew...I was up bright and early on wedding day making my bouquet by time they came it was half finished...which leads to making the bouquet...as a bargain hunter I divided my floral costs...splitted 3 ways wedding planner ordered rose petals, I ordered and picked up the rest of the flowers...I wanted all roses leading back to what I mentioned earlier my theme of simple and elegant...I mapped out exactly how many roses I needed... I wanted blue roses which I had a florist do to spray them and they also did my rehearsal cake topper...beautiful cake topper...one dozen blue roses were approx $55...so I mapped out a budget to make sure to get this special luxury...then the red roses I bought at a local grocery they were beautiful and vibrant... being a customer for a couple years before accepting marriage when time came I didnt hesitate to go checkout pricing...I bought 7 dozen red roses, baby breath, filler...my original bouquet idea was a full cascade, then revamp down to a mini cascade, revamp again down to a ball shape which was perfect...programs I did them I think they are effective because it has the date location outline of activities...since we had a destination wedding I did a mini outline of celebrations from wedding day in Lake Havasu, AZ to last day of celebration in Las Vegas, NV...Went to staples I created what to put in then staples just applied in their system and printed them...Wonderful job...again effective communication is key...dont be afraid to express your ideas and say no...something you dont like its fine your human you can change your mind...with such a busy world today many associates are overwhelmed and are like robots they just want to get the job done so they can go home its understandable but during that time one must stop and listen to what the customer has to say...so dont be afraid to say hey I dont like that I want this, and if it is just not effective communication dont be afraid to ask for someone else...Its your day and your presentation...I care how things will look and be when Im responsible for as you plus ordered some appetizers from the host hotel where the reception was as well...Reception when doing your wedding be sure to ask your hotel their guidelines about food...one hotel I had blocked they only allowed commerical foods which made it impossible to hold a breakfast the next day...all the skill of planning came in very helpful...utilize your work skills organizing, administrative...I asked my husband what he wanted, I included what I wanted, and ideas for those vegan, vegetarian, have allergies where one of my friends has a severe allergy to anything with chicken...so my husband and I got together periodically with our notes and with many deliberations and scratch offs able to create an effective food plan...we did a cash bar to help alleivate extraordinarily good times...however many guests did not show and we could not change...we had a nice small guest group...They helped leading up to the wedding and after...As a do-it-yourselfer you will -be very busy- many phone calls...phone calls take the longest because you have to allow time for the other party or parties involved for the task you are working on to get back to you...it will not be in a day...it will take minimal 1 week maximum I have observed 6 months (like when your custom dress has come in and time for your final fit)...Again purpose of your notebook is to look back see when last contact youve had with a vendor or vendors, venue, entertainment...I was lucky able to give callback dates and the vendors called right on the spot...Having a destination wedding you must partially sell your trust when handling majority like 99.2% of tasks from home...Being a frequent visitor helped in many ways...so if you plan to marry in a destination you visit frequently and you have gained valuable relationships with vendors and workers there it will definitely help you in the long run...Lastly a physical working budget is a touchy subject for me...Some people like to have a specific amount they know they want to work with, a specific approximate amount they think they will hit, or someone like me aware wanted just me and my husband to pay no one else and just wing it and know when at a deadend and just stop and be happy and thats what I did...can say used 50% cash and 50% credit c ard...budget if its what many want to call it got down to literally a flip of a coin a 10 minute firework show vs a 5 hour boat tour both close in price flipping coin heads for boat tour won...in which did save $200...Boat tour was 5 hours with a stop for lunch...I love both boats and fireworks so as for me I didnt care honestly which activity I was happy and excited had lovely long celebrations wedding day up to week after...Husband wanted a party style celebration so we made it happen...For those of you who read ALL the way thru hope you have been able to discover helpful tips to utilize for yourself or family and friends...Happy Day to all of you
