Pagan wedding

Well, the priest should be able to give you an idea of how they normally do the ceremony. As for your families, this is good practice for learning to maintain boundaries for the rest of your life. The basic message is, "This is our wedding and not yours. You can come and enjoy yourselves if you don't make everyone else uncomfortable, but you cannot dictate how it is to go."

View Quoted Comment Our priestess said to figure out what we would like and we could go from there. Which is pretty standard because there are so many ways to practice paganism.

We just arnt sure what direction to go.

View Quoted Comment Well summed up. You would not attend someone celebrating another religion's ceremonies, their child or adult baptism, or wedding , or high holidays religious service, as a guest, and expect them to turn everything upside down to follow your pagan beliefs. I hope. And they have absolutely no place being so incredibly disrespectful of you that they try to change your religious practices. It is about respect, and boundaries. They are guests, observers, of the religious and civil ceremony, it belongs only to you.

View Quoted Comment They have infact shown up to my house for a sabbat(invited) and demanded we pray there way before. I just asked them to leave....

I almost feel like I might need a bouncer -_- (I mean that wouldn't be an issue my fiancee is a cop so...lots of people who could easily do that)

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Ah, okay. We had a rabbi like that--which was particularly difficult because a lot of the ceremony is typically in Hebrew, which we don't speak. We ended up finding ceremonies on the Internet, and kind of adapting them.

IMO, the ceremony is totally up to the couple. As a Catholic, I would attend the wedding of a friend or family member because I love and support them, but would not participate in the religious aspects of the service. Some may choose not to attend the service at all, which is their prerogative. I know we had some guests not attend my daughter’s full nuptial mass but came to the reception. It didn’t bother me because I’m not trying to force anyone to attend mass and when it comes to religion everyone has their own comfort zone. My advice is to plan the ceremony you and your FH want and not try to cater to everyone else’s different beliefs.

Oh thank the gods! I thought we were the only ones! Hello and Blessings Be to you and CONGRATS!

FH and myself both follow a Celtic path of paganism and as such we're drawing on some of the ancient customs from the area. Most notably the hand fasting ceremony. We're trying to keep it as 'traditional pagan' as possible while also trying not to confuse/offend our jewish families.

What you should probably sit down and do first is figure out the intent behind what you want your ceremony to represent. All good magicks are bound with strong intentions and your wedding should be no different. Our intent was to enter into the union and perform as equals which is how we came to our handfasting.

You are also very lucky to have found a priestess! We didn't have much luck finding one ourselves so we ended up asking a friend. If you are truely having trouble coming up with ideas, you can simply as your priestess to help you figure out a ritual that would help to cement the intentions you want to show.

As far as our families go. This is going to be pretty much the most "in-your-face pagan" event we're ever going to have, but we figure they can either deal with it, or not show up lol.

FH and I aren't on the same religious plain. He is religious, as I am spiritual. I'm not pagan or wiccan, though I am a witch. We just aren't doing a religious ceremony.

View Quoted Comment Blessed be and I'm also glad we aren't the only ones!

We live in Michigan and there is a HUGE pagan population here!!! ConVocation is one of the biggest events out here for us (it's like a comicon but for pagans...it's pretty cool!)

And there is a local temple to us . So our priestess is apart of the clergy there .


Your right I should just ask the priests to guide us a little bit more.



And that sounds very reasonable when it comes to family...I'm probably overthinking it but they have been rude in the past about it so. Idk , lol.

Blessed be you guys, me too! We are having a priestess do our ceremony, we're going to cast a circle and call the quarters, then do a handfasting. Your priestess should be able to give you some guidelines, and make it as overt (or covert) as you wish it to be. I also got some good ideas from Raven Kaldera's book Handfasting and Wedding Rituals: Welcoming Hera's Blessing. He basically outlines 3 different methods: pagan beliefs hidden in a traditional ceremony; mid-level that's a little more out, and full-on pagan ritual. Ours will be something sort of in the middle, but more out than hidden.

My best friend is pagan, and I was a bridesmaid in her wedding. She had a similar situation - her side was fine with it, FH's side wasn't. So after the rehearsal, they had a small handfasting ceremony, and did a traditional ceremony for the wedding (but added in a few things that spoke more to her). I thought it was beautiful handled and made everyone feel comfortable!

Hi I’m late to this discussion but I was searching for other pagans. My Fiancé and I are having a handfasting and we’ve basically told them this is how it’s gonna be and to deal.

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GAH!
I might borrow this idea! FH is Catholic, we're having a Catholic ceremony, but I would very much like a handfasting at some point. Trying to figure out how to put it in the reception without it being a second ceremony...

Hmmm. Requires a good Winnie the Pooh Think Think Think.

Thank you!

My fiance and I are what we call pagan-ish....haven't legit practiced for a while. My mother is one of those fake devout Catholics: the kind that don't follow or understand their own religion but try to get everyone to think they do....and her whole side of the family is catholic. So we are doing a "light version" of a handfasting (explaining what the colors represent and thanking the gods and goddesses but not naming any of them specifically), an outdoor event, and adding small touches of spiritual elements into the traditional ones like some lunar representations and crystals. So basically, no one will really notice that is is pagan per day, but just that it's not something they've seen before. We also have a mix of tagelharpa, Celtic, violin and country music. Do what YOU want, and they do NOT have to show up. If you want them to show up but they have a problem with your religion, then you could water it down just a bit in the interest of getting your headcount up. Isn't it such a shame how everyone keeps telling us this is our day, and we are all sitting here asking each other how to give everyone else what they want?

I am wiccan, he is a diest. We are having a high priestess do the hands fasting and opening ceremony, and he hasn't decided yet for sure but we then will have a preacher ( if he chooses to) do the rings and closing. If he decides not on the preacher then the high priestess will do it all.