Photographer advice

I think getting a list of various family photos you want is a good idea and pretty common (you don't want to be swept up in everything and realize days/weeks later that you forgot to get a photo of you two with grandma). As far as poses go, unless there is something very specific you have in mind, most photographers should be able to guide you on that.

We gave our photographer our 'must have' photos - I really want to have a 'reaction photo' from my bridesmaids/friends who are getting ready with me when they see me fully dressed for the first time, so I want my my mum to help me put the dress on privately (and we'll get some shots of her doing that) and then another photo of the big 'reveal'. Other than that, we gave him a listing of the group family photos we want and that's it.

I'd run through what photos you'd expect/like over the course of the day, and just touch base if there's something out of the norm for him in there that you really want.

Ie, usually I'd expect photos to go something like:

boys getting ready

girls getting ready

photos of the venue set up

photos of guests arriving

photos of groom and groomsmen at the ceremony greeting guests

bride and bridesmaids arrive

ceremony photos

family portraits

couple photos

couple and bridal party enter the reception

cake cutting

speeches

dancing

sparkler exit

Put together a list of the groupings you want (i.e. Bride w/ parents, groom with parents, bride with grandparents, etc.). give them that list to make sure there is even enough time for all of the groupings you want and then they will probably pose you. Unless there are specific poses you have in mind, like Rosie said she did.

I agree with Sarah. Definitely put a list together so that way the photographer knows how many groups he will be working with especially to make sure to follow the time frame of your wedding.