Picky guest meal - please help!

View Quoted Comment There’s really no need to be that upset by a stranger’s comments on a public forum! And, yes, I’ve been in the emergency (on an overnight stay) due to a swollen month and throat from an allergic reaction that was slow to subside. So yes, I understand firsthand. But if you have issues with restaurant practices, then take that issue up with them (not a wedding forum stranger)! So, it might be more effective to direct that energy and blame in the proper direction. Customers shouldn’t influence a restaurant’s safety code practices and ethics. And, if so, then that sounds like a restaurant that you don’t want to patronize.

Definitely option 3. There’s a big difference between accommodating someone who is vegetarian or has allergies and someone who just can’t be bothered to expand their palette. Changing the kids meal to spaghetti is messy and unnecessary, and asking the caterer to cook food they didn’t buy would likely go at against their policy/insurance.

Option 3 for sure, and that is coming from a somewhat picky eater (albeit not as picky as this person). You don't get to have an entirely special meal served to you because you simply don't want the other three options. That is ridiculous. He can pre-eat or bring a couple granola bars.

View Quoted Comment But you said you lie to restaurants about being allergic to foods that you simply don't like...

If he lives his life in such a way that he only goes places where they only serve beef, then he is accustomed to missing out on social functions. This will just be another thing he chooses to not attend.

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100% agree here.

Definitely option 3. He needs to grow up they can get McDonald’s on the way there.

My fiancé and I are both picky eaters and I cannot IMAGINE a couple breaking their backs to accommodate my palette on their wedding day. I was in a wedding a few years back and did not care for either dinner option, so I ate before and after the wedding. I am well aware being a picky eater is not a choice for most of us, but if that’s you, be an adult about it; don’t lie about having a food allergy or expect people to cater to you.

Option 3. I presume the protein isn’t the only food being served at your wedding, so he isn’t likely to starve. The “accomodation” I might make is informing him the details of the full dishes — ie what all else is coming on the plate if the different proteins have different sides. If I’m lukewarm about an entree, I usually pick based on accompaniments (basically, if something comes with mashed potatoes, that’s what I’ll choose !)


I definitely wouldn’t change the kids option to something kids might enjoy less just to accommodate one adult . Option 2 also isn’t fair because there’s probably at least one other person who would prefer a hamburger over regular wedding food and they’d probably wouldn’t feel great to see someone else getting special treatment. At the end of the day, you have done a lot here to provide plenty of variety for your guests, you don’t need to do more. I’ve been to plenty of events where I don’t prefer the entree options, but I don’t recall ever leaving hungry. Between apps, salads, side dishes and desserts there’s always *something* everyone can manage to snack on.

Along with everyone else, I agree with going to option 3.

This person needs to pull up their big kid pants and such it up. Eating nothing but red meat isn't healthy either. I'm sure at the end of the day they'll eat what's in front of them, and if not that sucks for them.

You're doing plenty by providing food that everyone is able to eat, whether they choose to eat it or not is up to them.

Option #3.

This isn't a kid at home with mommy who will make sure he gets his fishy sticks and ketchup while the rest of the family eats something else. He's a grown man. If he doesn't like what is being offered, he can go through a drive thru afterward.

I went to a couple of weddings (as a guest) when I was on a very strict food challenge diet where I could only eat certain fruits and vegetables, plain cooked rice, and plain turkey (which you never see on wedding menus - it's always chicken). Absolutely no condiments, no spices, and most foods off-limits, including beef, chicken, fish, dairy (including butter; food had to be cooked only in EVOO), sugar of any kind... This wasn't even being picky, it was a medically necessary diet, but I never expected the couple to cater their whole wedding around it or get the caterer to make me a special meal. I brought a little Tupperware of my approved food with me, and told them in advance so that they didn't waste money on a plate.

He'll see when he gets the meal options in the invite that there is nothing he wants to eat and he can either figure it out himself or get over himself and eat what's being served.

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Yay on you for option #3. I had a legit gluten free guest (my SIL) and I catered to her as i knew she was legit. But picky eaters? Swing by McD's on your way home.

Agreed that spaghetti is very messy for the littles.

Option 3…I’m a picky eater and have issues with some foods but I don’t expect ANYONE to cater to my wants, especially on their special day. I’d eat before/after I attend and nibble on whatever I can eat.

View Quoted Comment Oh noooo! 😮🤭 Not… L-L-Lying!!!! And lying at a restaurant, of all places?!?!? Oh no no no!!! 😫 Just the thought of it. Gasp and clutch your pearls, Elizabeth.


But, yeah, you’re right!! I mean, lying to a restaurant is most definitely at the top of this country’s issues right now. So, yep, arrest me!

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As I stated in my comment, people lying causes others to become complacent. It's not about a specific restaurant's policies, it's about the fact that it's messed up to lie about having a life threatening condition.

Option 3. They'll be ok for one night.

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Keep justifying it to yourself however you want so you can "get the VIP treatment". You'rer no better than the people who park in handicap spaces because they feel entitled to even though they have no need. Every time you lie, you make it a little more likely that someone who has a real allergy will not be taken seriously. You are also causing the people in the kitchen, who work really hard already, to do lots of extra cleaning and work for absolutely no real reason.

"Relativity applies to physics, not ethics." - Albert Einstein

Um yeah #3. Being spoiled and picky is different than having a food allergy. We are having a similar problem with one of our guests, but he has numerous food allergies and literally told us that he would eat before the wedding to not inconvenience us. We love him so we are going to accommodate him, but this would be different if we knew he just didn't like what we were serving

As a vegetarian, I always appreciate accommodation but never expect it. As I tell people if it comes up, I have gotten very good at scrounging! It’s a choice of mine, so up to me to figure it out. So I’m voting #3. Any adult who has a voluntary dietary restriction or picky-ness is probably very used to sorting things out themselves.

Option 3, for sure. This is not Burger King and you do not have it your way on someone's wedding day. If that were the case, you would have to make A LOT of accommodations to fit people's preferences on everything.