I got engaged in December of 2019, and was so excited to get started in the process— and then, you know, a casual pandemic started. For months I told myself it would be fine, and carried on as usual with the little tasks I could take care of in the mean time. I even picked out and purchased the dress (probably a little prematurely) before everything shut down. Fast forward to August 2020, and we decided to push out the party 1 year while keeping a court date.
Now I know some of you have had similar struggles, and so forgive me as using the forum as a sounding board, but during this pandemic I have been doing everything I can to stave off “wedding blues” and keep my head above negative waters. I am so nervous about it all that I am not even sure it is going to happen.
We have a nice day at the court house planned, but decided to obviously invite only 6 people for a day of photos and food. I picked out a second (less voluminous and more casual) short dress to wear, and have come to terms with this idea, though it hasn’t been ideal.
I’m stuck at the 2nd ceremony/party, the “real” wedding we initially intended to have. Not only have costs come into focus, but my family lives all across the country, and all of his friends live here in Miami. It’s a small party of 30, to which we found a location, but now with only a year left to go, I don’t know how we will pay for it (and going into debt is out of the question). I am nervous people won’t travel, and that I wasted my money on a $1,000 dress that I fear I will never get to enjoy. I don’t have a bridal party as I have also moved across the country and people just don’t stick to me like that anymore, sadly. (I know, super depressing)
He is excited just to be with me, of course, my doting man takes it in stride, while I wished for such a grandeur representation of our love to be shared with what little circle I’ve been able to maintain.
I get that weddings are synonymous with stress, and so I am curious, have any other gals or guys out there gone through a similar line of thinking? I’ve just about wound myself into depression with all of these broken expectations-and for the life of me can’t seem to find a way out of this hole.
Happy to share pics
