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Savvy October 2025

Planning help

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Amanda, on December 6, 2022 at 2:50 PM

No help aside from one of my best friends and my fiancée himself to plan the wedding. I feel like this is my family's way of saying they don't support me, him or us as a couple. I've never been close to my family but I thought that maybe someone would help me go wedding dress shopping, help figure out wedding details, etc. but I was wrong in every way. When my sister got married, I was involved in the wedding itself and gave opinions on the dress when she went to try some on, etc. Annoyed beyond belief. For the record no one has ever met my fiancée because my family is super judgmental and just miserable and mean. I also never had friends really for this reason as well. I had one here and there literally just 2 or 3 that came and went and I haven't spoken to those people in 15-20 years now. Am I wrong to be irritated that I'm not getting any help especially since I know nothing about fashion, style or how to plan anything period?

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Expert May 2010
Theresa · on December 9, 2022 at 7:24 PM
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Honestly, I did the same. The only person I invited from my father's side was my grandmother. When my three uncles found out that I wasn't inviting them or their families, they told my grandmother she shouldn't go if they couldn't. She told me that, I said okay, we'll miss you (we didn't), and she ended up not coming, either.
That was my marriage to my ex back in the late 90's, and to this day I don't regret it. My second husband and I eloped. Again, no regrets.
It's good that you are making the decisions that are best for you. There is no reason to keep toxicity in your life!
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Savvy October 2025
Amanda · on December 9, 2022 at 7:42 PM
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Thank you. It was the easiest decision I ever had to make once I realized what I had to do to make myself healthy, happy, at peace and calm. It's honestly the greatest feeling ever! Worst comes to worst, I won't invite my extended family either if they think it's wrong I didn't invite my immediate. It's my first and only wedding. I don't even bother talking about my wedding, my fiancée, hell I don't talk much period really. I keep my Raycons in and any conversation at all brief, with all of them. Aside from my 25 year old niece who I basically raised, but she's standoffish and private like myself so yeeeah. Haha our wedding is tiny anyway. Only 30 guests total (if that). He has his new friends and I've got my two best friends who are my wedding party. Haha. They and my niece, her best friend, and my two friends' "plus ones" that I okayed them to bring are likely my only guests. My one remaining grandparent is 90 on Christmas and who knows if she'll even be here by the time my wedding gets here. We'll be in another state by then anyway and I'd invite my aunt and uncles (the ones I'm closest to anyway) but that may be awkward since my immediate family isn't invited so I'll probably not even do that. Haha.
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