Planning is challenging with diagnosed OCD

@taylors -- thank you... i appreciate the help, but this site is too negative for me, I think. I've received so much helpful feedback and it's a real shame that it's ruined by people who choose to criticize.

@jessicab -- thank you for your understanding. It's really hard, especially with little things like this. The wedding planning has brought out a very anxious side of me. Therapy certainly helps but it can't fix everything :/

I understand the desire to have things matching or continuing with your theme and colors. I'm striving to having a monogrammed crest made as our "brand" to consistently use on the invitations, enclosures, menu, etc.

I don't think they have to match but it would be nice if they did. As others have pointed out though guests are unlikely to notice the difference.

@OP wow, sorry for assuming. My diagnosed OCD is very different from yours I guess. If you don't mind my asking, is your current therapy/medication combo working? I know lots of different things can trigger OCD but I never really felt like being anal-retentive was a part of mine; that was more a trait of my personality and wanting to have things be organized.

And yes, call me what you will, but I'm still actually calling you out for your title.

@mrsnerd... No, my medication is not helping. I've struggled more since being put on the medication but therapy is helping. I'll find that little details and uneven or mismatched cards are really hard -- I'll spend hours trying to do it over and over again. Last night, it took me 20 minutes to set my alarm. I had to keep checking it to make sure it was on.

I'm a teacher and I know that there is no one size fits all model for kids just like there isn't a one size fits all remedy or diagnosis for people that struggle with mental illness.

I'm incredibly hurt by the fact that I was called a liar and criticized so harshly for using a diagnosed word in reference to MY planning. I'm sorry if it offended anyone but I would also think that I should not hide my diagnosis and I look to you women and men for support as I'm planning the most important day of my life. With that said, I maybe assumed others would commiserate and I see on this thread that I'm not the only one that experiences their OCD in this way.

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OP, just some advice if you decide to post again. If you put OCD in your title, please let people know in your original post that you have been diagnosed with OCD. It should prevent people from thinking you are using a clinical term flippantly

ETA: @TLE, the OP has stated she has been diagnosed with OCD, she's not just using OCD as a way to describe her behavior.

I have OCD, you said you have OCD, too. Your title is still offensive AF without CONTEXT.

Bring awareness, don't push people away by getting shitty with them because you're upset.

I fixed my title. But still really heartbroken about all of the major assumptions. Though this was supposed to be a helpful place... not a place where women shame and bash each other.

Ok soooo (I dont have OCD) so maybe my opinion sucks but I think they should match, I think it ties the look together. I think it would bother me for them not to match, if you order professionally made invitation suites -they often have matching sets- because it brings it together as a matching set.

ETA: at the end of the day no one will remember it except you.

@Jessica I. feel. you. on. the. lotion. I'm like consistently dry and if I don't have lotion with me everywhere I go my day is WRECKED

@Carissa, it is a helpful place. I think too often on this site people use mental illnesses they do not struggle with as a way to describe their situation, (i.e. the meme TLE posted) and it rightfully offends those user who are diagnosed. While I think some of the comments were far too harsh, it is a natural reaction when they believed that you were making fun of something they have to deal with in their everyday lives.

Changing the title was a good move, hopefully now you can get more helpful advice!

I am literally TOLD my multiple people that I have OCD because I am anal-retentive in both my work and every day life. Because of this, for a long time as a pre-teen/teen, I used the term OCD to describe what was just my personality until I realized how very wrong of me to do so it was. I educated myself about the disorder.

Since you didn't provide any context in your original post about having OCD yourself, I made the (wrong) assumption that you were just being one of the MANY people who incorrectly use this term to describe being fussy and orderly. I did so in order to try and HELP those with actual diagnosed OCD because of my past experiences.

I am sorry if what I said was incorrect and it was not my intention to offend someone who actually has OCD.

Thanks for changing your title, and then saying that I "shame and bash" other women. Best of luck, hope you feel better!

ETA title *and story

Thank you... @jessicab -- like I said -- I checked my alarm for 20 mins (back and forth) to make sure it was on and that it was going to ring in the morning.

Another thing that I've stared doing, which is awful, is picking my lip obsessively (too the point where it bleeds). My FH is very supportive and helps by pulling my hand away or bringing attention to it in a positive non-judgmental way. I am worried though because this is a new behavior and my doctor attributes it to OCD.

Carissa, do you pick your lip if there is an imperfection (dry piece or cut)? Or is it a random grabbing your lip and start picking? I do it when my lips do not feel smooth (texture is a huge trigger for my OCD) so I use lip scrubs a lot. I still pick, but it's definitely not as often.

I think that if you're happy with the turn out then it will flow together

@glitterbombs68xX I do it randomly, and pick until it's uneven. And then I have to even it out. It's awful. Painful, and looks bad.

I get that, I have caught myself doing that as well. Like I said, lip scrubs may be a form of relief for you.

Hi Carissa! Having everything match is a great way to keep your wedding theme and colors consistent, however I think it can also be overkill to use the same design on everything. You could keep the white flowers on the place cards and menus, but then make the color of your font/text a purple that matches the watercolor from your invitations. If that idea still doesn’t sit well with you, then making everything match will probably put your mind at ease. Would love to see a photo of your watercolor design, if you have one. And Good Luck with your decision!