Plus onesie

Is it not customary to extend plus ones to your guests?
Let me know, cause I’m not sure what the etiquette is these days....

If she's not seeing someone when your invitations should go out (about 8 weeks before the wedding date), you're not obligated to give her a plus one. However, is she correct that she won't know anyone else at your wedding? In that case it would be gracious of you as the host to give her a guest. No, meeting your friends at your bachelorette party isn't the same as knowing people at your wedding.

I personally would rather my friend be comfortable and have someone to talk to. I am extending plus ones to any friends that ask for them, but that's just me. I have been not allowed to bring a boyfriend or whatever because they didn't do plus ones and had pretty hurt feelings. I made it a priority to make room for them.

In a situation where someone really doesn't know anyone, you don't have to extend a plus one, but it might be a nice gesture. Most people on here will probably say you shouldn't/don't have to though as etiquette dictates only married couples have to be invited together.

I am not giving plus ones to anyone that is not married and/or in a serious relationship. I don't know whats customary but I know what my budget can handle! I want people around me that I love and love me back. I understand the idea of being alone and feeling uncomfortable. I was that guest. However, being on the other side of the spectrum (the bridge paying for the wedding) I know how hard it is to limit your guest list as it is. And I think any friend that loves you will ultimately understand that you couldn't invite your next door neighbor that watches your kids, let alone the stranger she wants to randomly bring.

I am pretty frugal and wanted to budget our wedding decent but in fairness to your friend, I would not go to a wedding where I didn't know anyone and didn't get plus one. It's incredibly uncomfortable. Meeting them at the bachelorette isn't the same as really knowing other guests. I am giving all single guests plus ones, as that's very much the standard in my circles, but even if I wasn't... Someone who won't know others should probably get one if you want then to enjoy themselves and feel comfortable.

I didn’t give plus ones (but made sure to invite significant others).

But I had one friend ask for a plus one. She wasn’t seeing anyone, and she knew several people there. I let her have one because it’s just one person, but it can be a little frustrating. I’d definitely give a plus one if they don’t know anyone.

View Quoted Comment Ashlee, custom of super traditional etiquette dictates that only married couples. But I’m not that traditional and have been on the end of not going with my then boyfriends now fiancé to a wedding because we weren’t married. I am totally cool with boyfriends and girlfriend coming. But this person that I’m not even allowing to come doesn’t exist. If she starts dating someone in the meantime than of course he can come. We are have been very strict with our guestlist and FH is strong on the fact that the people their are their to support our union. So yeah, it’s challenging...

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All guests in relationships (regardless of length) should be invited with their Significant Other by name - that's not a Plus One, however. True Plus Ones, aka "and Guest" invitations given to single guests, are not required by etiquette but are a nice gesture, especially in certain circumstances like with wedding party members, guests who have to travel by themselves otherwise, or guests who don't know anybody else at the wedding.

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No etiquette rule ever dictated that only married couples be allowed, nor does etiquette dictate that only married couples have to be invited. Even very old school etiquette acknowledged serious relationships (e.g. engaged couples) and dictated that both members of the couple be invited. Regardless, if your friend truly would not know anybody else at the wedding I would strongly suggest you allow her a guest, and traditional etiquette would certainly back that up. Etiquette is about making certain that your guests are comfortable both socially and physically.

If she truly won't know anyone, give her a plus-one. You don't want your wedding to be causing social anxiety for someone you consider a friend. I've never been to a wedding where I didn't know anyone, but if I was invited to one, I'd probably decline as badly as I wanted to go. Going into a social situation where I don't know anyone is terrifying.

I'm pro plus one. I barely know all the people on my FH's side.

I am giving plus ones to everyone, including single people.. I wouldn’t go to a wedding alone.... my FH couldn’t attend my bff’s wedding so I took my mom..

Personally, I would extend that courtesy. That's probably unpopular opinion but I wouldn't want someone that I thought enough of to invite to end up feeling like an outcast, extra wheel, or wallflower.

I don’t plan on inviting guests as a couple unless they are married or engaged. I’m having a microwedding and I don’t want complete strangers in my pictures.
one of my really good friends invited her brother’s gf to her wedding. Mind you her brother and his gf flew from Hawaii to the Midwest to attend this wedding. The gf never even said “hello” nor greeted the bride at all! And the bride is her boyfriend’s sister! That is ridiculous and quite rude!

I gave +1 to everyone married, or that I knew was in a relationship (if for whatever reason they were hooking up with someone that I didn’t know about, then they didn’t get a +1).
I also gave +1 to friends who didn’t know anyone.
Single family members didn’t get a +1 - as they know other family.

We plan on giving all our currently singles a plus one. It doesn't mean they HAVE to scramble to get a date but have the option to bring someone if they want or feel it's necessary. Not everyone has the same comfort level in social situations. my SO and I have not been able to go to a wedding together in the past because of the rules the couple decided on. I can see how it would be annoying to pay for a stranger to eat but try not to look at it that way.

I'm not doing a +1, I have less than 70 people invited and a small budget.
A lot depends on the size of the wedding, under 75 people, mirco, or family only event you never need to think about +1 in my opinion.
100+ guests I would start thinking about it and at about 150 I'd say it's rude not to do +1.
Formality plays a little factor, I feel more formal weddings you invite serious significant others but not random dates, less formal weddings I think it's more acceptable to have random dates.
There's also a know your crowd factor, in my socail circle nobody has done +1 for their weddings because of budgeting so nobody would expect it. Only my siblings have significant others and we are not close enough to cousins to justify trying to figure that out. If you are close with your cousin's I could see extending it to them if you know they're dating someone.
But for a friend asking for a +1 I would be uncomfortable too, I would say no myself.

View Quoted Comment Okay that makes sense, is there specific wording you put on invitations or rsvp cards? Haven’t gotten that far into my planning! Thanks

Any of my guests in relationships (for any length of time) were invited with their partner by name. Everyone else besides my grandma got a +1. Most single friends RSVP'd without a +1, some are bringing their friend, sister etc. The last thing I want on my wedding day is to feel like I have to entertain anyone. And I'd definitely feel that way if I had guests who came solo and didn't know anyone else.

I also obviously want my guests to feel appreciated and have a great time! Allowing +1 for about 30ish of my 80 guests probably added 12 people to my total. Most of my friends are young and single, I think most people have less than 30 single friends so it's probably even less of an addition to their final head count.

A plus one only goes to single people. People in relationships should always be invited together. I believe in extending plus ones where it adds to the comfort of your guest. The randomness of her date is pretty irrelevant.

If she doesn’t know anyone else there she will be bored and lonely. Meeting your friends is not the same as having a companion of her own. If I was your friend and you weren’t going to extend me a plus one you may as well have not bothered inviting me. There’s no point in going to a wedding like that alone, I’d have a better time at home with Netflix. I didn’t give every guest a plus one but I definitely gave every guest who wouldn’t know anyone else a plus one.