Polite way of asking for money instead of gifts?

Do a search - this is covered daily. Basically, there’s no polite way to ask for money. Everyone knows that money is a good gift. Don’t register, don’t have a shower and people will get the idea. Also avoid honeyfunds because they take a cut of the cash - I’d much rather give you cash myself than give it through a site which will take a percentage.

Same boat. We made a registry only for those who specifically ask for it. We would rather have money and hope that no registry listed hints at that

Try a cash registry, but I had no idea it takes a cut. Maybe if you list what you want to spend it on as a couple on your registry and recommend they send money through venmo or something.

View Quoted Comment This exactly!

We registered but didn’t put it on the invite, it’s on our website though if they go visit it. And some people have asked me where I’m registered and then I send them a link to my registry. I prefer giving people cash gifts myself but some people enjoy shopping for others. We’ve been living together for years and have everything but when we registered we did things to “upgrade” what we have. Like changing the bathroom decor, new curtains, picture frames, vacuum etc.

I've been wondering the same thing. I'm planning on doing a small registry, that way if/when the registry is all bought for us the last thing to really give is money/checks/giftcards.

We used a honeymoon registry - Wanderable. The fee is 2% if they used card (it’s not 20% like I’ve seen some people say that’s crazy lol). A lot of my friends have said it’s convenient and I know my family likes the idea of helping us enjoy our trip. also, with that site they give a cash option that basically tells you someone is gifting you something but they bring the cash to the wedding so no fee for that (that way people who like to do cash gifts can know what their cash is going towards on the honeymoon). Not everyone will even use the honeymoon site but then this way they know what you’d like.
But if don’t register at all people will probably bring you cash. It’s just that you migt get a million questions about where your registered/ what you want ect.

My FH and I are asking for a honeymoon fund rather than gifts. We already live together and have wayyyy to much as is.

Also in the same boat. My fiancé and I have been living together for theee years. I asked a family member who once said it’s rude what she would suggest on the matter. She said don’t put your registry out there so when they RSVP you can say they are saving for a new home but they are registered etc. i have way more on the registry then I thought I would. For upgraded stuff and amazon lets you add money towards a big gift such as an expensive vaccum, tv and rug (examples on mine).

Don’t ask for money. Everyone knows money is a good gift. Honeymoon funds take a cut so I don’t like them for that reason but some people don’t mind them. I’m using Zola and making a small registry of physical items. They do give the option to add experiences, group gifting, gift cards, funds, etc.

We included a small blurp on our wedding website that since we have everything we need, we only require guests to show up (it's a destination wedding and big enough expense for some!), we did include that there will be a card box at the reception.

I figure this implies if you want to bring a nice card, go for it, if you want to put some cash in the card, that's fine as well. But we aren't outright asking. I also don't like honeymoon sites for their fees.

This was the verbiage I used:

We hope you will join our celebration.

If to send a gift is your intention

In modesty we would like to mention.

We have already got a kettle and a toaster

Crockery, dinner mats and coasters.

So rather than something we have already got..

We only request

You turn up as our wedding guest.

(a card box will be at the reception)

Your presence is the only present we require!!

There is no polite way to ask for money.

1) Don’t ask for money in wedding invites, websites, etc. Wait until they ask if you’re registered.

2) You can say “we’re not registered” or tell them Zola, Honeyfund, etc. (the fee is tiny, about 2% which fine for the convenience for you & guests).

3) Have a small table at your wedding for guests who bring gifts anyway & a card box for those who bring cards/cash. Consider having someone in charge/move the card box somewhere safe because these have been stolen (our venue moved our gifts & cards inside during cocktail hour).

I don't personally think asking for money is ever polite, but I think if you know your crowd would be okay with it, that's fine I guess. I just wouldn't register and people will know to gift cash or checks.

Don't ask for gifts ever, it doesn't matter what the occasion is. If you don't register (see note below) people will get the hint and bring monitary gifts. Monitary gifts are the norm the world over, there's no reason to tell people you'd like money. No one is going to wonder if cash would be an appreciated gift. Should you have guests who only give boxed/wrapped gifts, asking for money won't change their minds. They'll still give a physical gift.

Note about registries
Setting up a registry isn't the same thing as asking for gifts. They are used as a way to let guests know what you would appreciate and the style of things you like, should they ask. Registry information is communicated only when guests ask or by a host of a shower. The big point here is that the couple isn't going around telling/asking the guests.

Just don't register for anything. They'll get the idea.

There is no way to ask for money and not sound rude. There is not saying/poem cute enough in the world, I don't care how much it rhymes. We are in the same boat, we've lived together for years, in our mid thirties we don't need anything. So we just aren't registering. If people ask we will simply say, we have all we need. If they choose to give money, go out on their own and pick something tangible out, or give nothing it's fine by us.

I'm including an extra card in the envelope with the invitation, it says:

"Wishing Well

If you were thinking of giving a gift to help us on our way.

A gift of cash towards our dreams would really make our day.

However, if you prefer a gift, feel free to surprise us in your own special way."

D. xx