Post-wedding Depression

I wouldn't say I had post wedding depression, but I was was when it was all over. I spent so much time and effort planning my dream wedding. Afterwards, I didn't really know what to do with all of my extra time. I got over it fairly quickly. We have turned our focus onto the next chapter of our lives, which really helped me move past missing wedding planning.

I find it fun to stay on WW forums to offer advice to other brides. That also helped with missing my own planning.

I’m really sorry to read that you are going through depression of your wedding being over. I never knew there was such a thing. Let me ask you, do you have anything to move you past this? I coach my women clients by working on crowding out things that are holding them back from moving forward. Don’t take it the wrong way, not telling you to forget the day but to incorporate other things into your daily life so it is not so front and center. One idea might be to journal your feelings and your day. It does help tremendously and you can share anything.


One thing I did and it may help for others going through this same thing is that I did not consume my day with our wedding. I took the things that were most important and completed them right away. The things that were left I took care of throughout the week. I didn’t have a lot of time to get things accomplished I only had 5 months to get it all done. This way I didn’t think only about the planning.
We also have been dating for 14 years and so the excitement of having a house together and learning about each other is past. We have our routines and so the dynamics are a bit different in our house.
I have my things to do, menu planning, walking, taking care of our Cocker Spaniel and working in his business, it gets me through the day and so I don’t let the planning consume me.
I hope you find a little peace. If you need to speak about it, reach out and let me know. I would love to walk through this with you, and help you if I can.
Blessings

I'm sorry that you're going through this! From what I've heard, the post wedding blues are fairly common. One thing you could do to help ease it is to put together a scrapbook or photo album of all your wedding pictures! That way, you're still re-living your wedding memories, but it'll help pass time and hopefully help ease the blues. You could also start a new hobby: sign up for a class that teaches something you've always wanted to do (painting? Photography? Yoga?), or if you like sports, sign up for a sports league! You could also stay on these forums and offer advice to other brides as a way to ease the blues! Since you've already been through it all, your advice will be especially helpful. If the blues last more than a few weeks, I would recommend scheduling an appointment with a therapist to work through it quicker.

View Quoted Comment

Excellent ideas.

Sorry to hear that you’re going through this… Have you set any goals for after the wedding? I.e. kids, house, honeymoon?? Heck start a baby registry if you plan on having children even if it doesn’t happen for another few years. It seems like you’re still in the planning/party mode and I understand that excitement is hard to get over.


You mentioned taking your dress to your honeymoon… Is that something you plan on doing soon? I would start looking up some adventures that you and your new hubby can take! Unique places that you can go, and things that you can just start experiencing together as husband and wife.

View Quoted Comment

We actually bought a house 2 days after our wedding day and we will be moving to our a new place in the next 2-3 week.

We do not plan on having kids anytime soon and I just feel down to do anything . I can't even focus on work and I'm even thinking about getting a new job. I have been so depressed that I have lost so much weight after the wedding.

We have not planned our honeymoon just yet but we are hoping to go somewhere in the summer after our bank accounts recover from the wedding and buying the house. but yes I am thinking about taking my wedding dress with.

Husband and I were the ones who did all the planning, set up and clean up so we have been busy for a while and hard to believe it's just over.

View Quoted Comment I know it feels that way but its NOT over♥️ The party has just begun!
Have you guys thought about setting saving goals for the honeymoon? Or any place in particular you were thinking of?

View Quoted Comment

Yes we do have that goal as we are wanting to do the honeymoon on the same year of our wedding. we are planning to either go to hawaii or mexico which is something I'm really looking forward to (plus it gives me something to plan) do you think it would be weird if I wear my wedding dress on the honeymoon?

It is a fit and flare dress and I love it so much.

View Quoted Comment Um no!!!! Once we figure out our honeymoon I am absolutely 100% going to wear my dress! Tons of people to this! This is the track that you need to be thinking on! The next step! Hawaii or Mexico sounds amazing! Keep focusing on that! And also it may help to even keep posting on forums here talking about the planning process!
I’ve dealt with depression and believe it or not, I would suggest against joining anything like Zumba class or what not. It will just be one other chore that you have to add to your list and you’re already feeling emotionally drained.
Stick to focusing On THIS! This is so exciting and this forum is the perfect place to talk about plans for the honeymoon! Do you have Hulu by any chance?! There is the show that I think will get you so hyped on checking out honeymoon spots! It’s called Caribbean life and it’s just another reality TV show about people buying houses either in Mexico or Puerto Rico or Saint Croix, but it just gets me really pumped thinking about honeymoons and I think it might help you too LOL

Also… Don’t throw away your hand sanitizer away! Have you ever thought about throwing a housewarming party?! Pass some out to your guests if you decide to have a little cocktail wine and cheese night with friends or something!

View Quoted Comment

I agree! lots of people are telling me to start something new but it's the last thing I want to do right now. like every time I think about starting something new, I go like "that is it! this is my life now?"

Thank you for the suggestions, I would sure love to check out those shows (too much time on my hands now so why not hahhaha). Thinking about the honeymoon is what's keeping me calm now days anyway and it's something I will really remember to enjoy every moment of it.

View Quoted Comment

YES! That's a great idea actually.

Men don't get it sometimes you know? I can't get myself to donate them or throw them away.

At some point during planning I had like 10 open tabs on my computer trying to compare all the bottles lol then I would lose sleep trying to think how they would go on the tables

so using them for the housewarming party would be a wonderful idea

View Quoted Comment That’s awesome! I’m so glad I could help! If you ever want to talk about honeymoon stuff or housewarming party planning hit me up!

View Quoted Comment I know exactly what you mean about the whole “starting something new “. It always makes me feel like I’m losing something And I get this overwhelming melancholy sadness and emptiness. your feelings don’t lie to you. When you’re in the moment you’re in the moment and the only way to fix that is by feeding into that moment and desensitizing yourself to it until you’re satisfied. Hence the whole housewarming party! It’s stuff to think about and plan and it’s a lot cheaper than a wedding LOL! Thinking about the invitations etc. i’m getting excited about it just thinking about it for you LOL

View Quoted Comment You just bought a house, that's amazing! I would throw myself into decorating, fixing up, organizing, etc. Even if it's not a good time to spend a lot of money on renovations, you can make Pinterest boards with future ideas and learn simple DIY projects too. Then you'll have a new project to be excited about


Also seconding throwing yourself into a hobby. I think sometimes we as adults hesitate to try a new thing, but starting a sport or activity as an adult is actually awesome because there is no pressure to "make the team" or anything. I started soccer as an adult, picked up tap dancing, learned to cook, all at very little cost. I also love reading now. Do that thing you always wanted to try as a kid!

It's only been a week. Post wedding blues is pretty common. Give yourself some time!!! Enjoy being married. Get excited about your new house. I am sure it will get better soon.

I am still in the process of planning my wedding, but from the past weddings that I was a part of even I had post wedding depression. It was because the brides definitely included her girls with all the planning, activities, etc. that led up to the big day. We had so much fun altogether, developed so many memories, and when it was all over it that was it. However, I kept looking back at pictures and videos for about two weeks to keep reminding myself how much fun I had. It was feelings that I did not want to let go of yet.

If you had a videographer then maybe gather up your family, friends, and those who were part of the wedding party to come over to your house for dinner, and to watch your wedding video altogether when it is finalized?

I’m sorry to hear that. I also feel the same way. My ceremony was the only thing I had so far. My morning of the ceremony I was going crazy didn’t feel good. 8/8/20 - by the time walking down the aisle I was still in tears I saw masks and 3 people couldn’t be there. My aunt was sick. Uncle is in Texas. Cousin sick. So it was far from perfect. I almost passed out doing pictures outside. I see the pictures I’m not smiling. In November my aunt died (today would’ve been her bday. ) so I’m still not out of the depression. My party is in April and it’s going to feel like nothing worthwhile to have a party this late. I’ll try make the most of it for my aunt who would want me celebrate she be there in spirt.

Try to look at the good over the bad. You are married to who you wanted to be with. I will get to wear my dress again for my party in April. It’s really hard because of covid.

New hobbies, help other brides on here, etc few things you can do

I still have post wedding depression and my wedding was in October. My day went so fast and I wish I could do it all over again❤️ But just remembering all the details of my day makes it better knowing that the day served it’s purpose and now it’s solely about my husband and I, not the wedding anymore

Post-wedding blues are pretty common. You spend a ton of time, energy, and money on one day and it goes by so fast (and is rarely "perfect")!

One person I know told me his wife puts on her wedding dress every year on their anniversary, which I thought was super cute, and might be a nice way to make it feel like the wedding isn't "over" and you can still embrace parts of it you really enjoyed in the future.