Pregnant MOH - I'm not selfish, I'm human.

I think it's natural to be frustrated with the situation because you can't really plan for something that is so "up in the air." You never know how her pregnancy will go. Not everybody has those beautiful un-problematic pregnancies. I pray that her and the baby's health stays in tip top shape for her and the baby's sake... not just for the wedding. But, that being said... there's not much you can do. She's pregnant, the baby is coming, and that's that. She can't undo it and you can either do what you can to plan around it, or ask her to step down. Your wedding is one day, a baby and your friendship with her is forever. Hopefully,

It's ok to not like the situation but it would be wrong for you to show it lol. Dont make her feel bad or gulity about being preggie. She has no control it. And Im pretty sure she would love to be there if she could. Just make sure to include her in as much bridal activities as you can up unto the wedding. Enjoy her while you can...

Can you move the wedding up a month? Depending on her pregnancy, it might not be an issue for her. I had a professor who taught, in heels, 3 time a week until the DAY she gave birth, so it might not be so bad

Yes, it's frustrating for sure. Sorry about the sucky situation. The worst part is really that she will be going through something so important and it's hard to focus on a Wedding if you're pregnant with a child. Bachelorette party etc... Won't be as fun with a pregnant chick. I say just invite her and replace her as MoH.

You are allowed to have emotions of course... and you can come here to vent.

what you should NOT do is tell your MOH that you're angry. you can tell her that you're sad and that you'll miss her on your wedding day (if she does in fact decide that she will be too pregnant to travel). you should also let her be the one to decide whether she can still be there with you.

you could just let her pick a different dress in the same color and plan on her being there - it can be a last minute decision if she can't come, ya know?

I can side with you on this one. You are obviously happy for her, but you feel that you are both being robbed of the experience of her being with you on your wedding day.

I TOTALLY GET THIS.

Advice? One day at a time until her due date is finalized. Expect the worst in your mind, hope for the best. Lead with the best intention that a best friend would. Hope for her happiness and health, and that the baby has ten fingers and ten toes. Hope for a beautiful, healthy addition to her family. Hope for a happy ending for both of you.

There's nothing wrong with being upset about the situation and at the fear that your best friend may not be able to be there for such a big day of your life.

Your wedding is in 6 months -- is she already 3 months pregnant? I mean, all you can really do is the best you can do.

So you said 2 things that make me think you aren't a complete B in the situation

1 "If she is in it, there have to be major changes to the BM dresses and adjustments to make sure she is comfortable. She is my best friend, and I am extremely happy for her."

You are already thinking about her comfort and not worrying about the dress being altered.

2 "But, I am angry. Not at her, at the situation. I want the woman who has stuck by my side for so long to be there alongside me for this step too. I am sad, that I won't be able to share the experience with her."

Its 100% normal to want your BFF there with you on the big day! DUH that is why we have MOHs.

So, yes have emotions but dont get mad at BFF for getting preggo - just tell her you are sad she might not be able to be here. I would wait and see what her due date is and then work from there. Maybe ask if she wants to step down and be a guest instead w/ a possibility of doing a reading depending on the baby's arrival. cont'

She may realistically not be able to juggle both or not even want to be MoH anymore with this conflicting with her due date. You can talk to her to see how she feels. Don't force her out, just ask if its too much and if she'd rather sit this one out.

But most of all make sure you tell her that you aren't mad at her - just sad that she may not be able to be there with you on your big day.

You're absolutely allowed to have emotions...it's how you handle them that makes the difference! This could be an opportunity for the positive if you're willing - if your MOH means that much to you, keep her in the wedding - show everyone how special she is by setting her apart from the BMs...you could just change her dress so that she is comfortable AND looks great standing by your side.

One of my BMs is due next week, and she just went with me to a bridal expo, vendor appointment, etc....If she is healthy towards the end of her pregnancy and not bed-ridden, you will be so glad you kept her in the wedding party.

Two of my bms were pregnant while I was planning and this was before I had a date set. They both said if they have SIT by my side with their preggo bellies they will. I would have been more than happy to offer them a chair at the alter with me. See how she feels. Both of my bms were up and around until hour they had to push.

I understand the sadness that she may not be there. I wouldn't be angry, its a huge thing for her and I'm sure the date picked was not intentional. Its not selfish to be upset you may not get to spend your day with her....

Changing dresses isn't big, she MOH she can wear something different and it'll look great .

Remember she needs you as much as you need her!

I totally feel your pain. Two of my BMs got pregnant and could not attend our wedding. At first I was so upset that they weren't going to be there. But honestly as the day got closer I was more focused on all of the people that were going attend and happy to attend and excited to attend. On the actual day I didn't even miss them. I know it doesn't seem like it but the emotions will wear off and it all won't matter in the end because you'll be married

I totally get this! My best friend/MOH is trying to get pregnant and I feel awful for hoping it happens in the spring. If she's pregnant and waddling down the aisle it is OK by me! I realize she could be nine months at the wedding and if her baby is born on that day then I will show up at the hospital in full wedding attire! Lol.

The good thing is tha we have awesome technology and maybe she can facetime or Skype the wedding from a front row seat! I know it's not ideal but twenty years down the road it'll be a laugh. I get where you're coming from and hate that you have to deal with this too but the more time goes on the less it'll bother you.

It's normal to be sad/angry that you are upset with the situation. As has been said, don't tell your MOH that! I think that as she is your MOH and not a BM, you can just change her dress. I think that you should first talk about how happy you are that she is expecting and let her know how much you care for her. Have a conversation about HER. I'm sure she excited/scared/etc. about the pregnancy. Step back from it's impact on you for a conversation. Then later, discuss if she wants to remain in the wedding and support her decision. She may not be able to help as much but she should know what she feels comfortable agreeing to. (But also keep in mind that things may change as her pregnancy continues so her responsibilities may have to change as well; please let her know that plans and change if needed)

I think you're handling this really well. I can definitely see being frustrated & angry in this situation. I'm glad you can vent to us!

But don't 100% write off your MOH yet. My friend just got married this summer, and her MOH was 9 months pregnant. She was there for it all--the planning, the shower, even the bach party. She was a trooper through pictures and the ceremony, did the grand entrance, and then went to the hospital and gave birth. That freaking night. I know everyone's pregnancy is different, but don't automatically assume that you're losing your friend throughout this process.

@Lori ... DAMN

Chances are most likely that she will NOT have her baby on or right before your wedding date. Sure she might be 9 months pregnant on the day or she will already have a newborn, but either way, I'm sure she will find some way to be there as long as you continue to show your excitement and support for her pregnancy. Even if she has a two week old and exhausted, she could find a way to be there.

Your feelings are totally legit, not selfish. My brother and his wife have been trying to get pregnant for a while with their second child. Their first is my ring bearer. She is a bridesmaid, he is a groomsman. I was so worried because she is too far to drive and I was afraid she wouldn't be able to fly. Words can't express how sad I would be if my brother and sil weren't at my wedding. Luckily, she will only be 5 months and it shouldn't be a issue!! We ordered her dress a few sizes bigger in anticipation, and were told she could add side panels if we needed. So if she can make it, there is hope for dress alterations.