Reception Ideas... with out alcohol and secular music

Thanks so much guys.. I still want the tradtional reception with the bow k toss and fatuer daughter dance.... I also told him that we should play what we want and like but he said people will still dance dirty to christan music. I think that if theres no drinking then that shouldnt ne an issues. We feel that since we dont drink why should we have people drinking of we dont. We dont like to watch or be around drunk people. No offense to those who drink...

I agree with celia..actually i usually always do..what she says is mostly dead on!. I being a christian myself remember in the bible where Jesus himself turned the water into wine at a WEDDING! maybe you could remind your fh of that.but if its against what you believe in then can you just rent out a room in the Church for afterwards and maybe have a brunch?..or have a brunch somewhere else and you could have a mimosa toast or if no alcohol then i think the morning early afternoon time would be alot more acceptable than evening for a non alcoholic wedding!..maybe make it a more game themed wedding!..you will have to do something to entertain the guests if there is no booze or dance music!

Okay here is something I don't get. Where in the bible does it say that Christians shouldn't drink? I am a christian myself. For my wedding I had an open bar (I do drink) and a DJ (I love to dance). There were both fellow Christians from my church and your everyday people that don't go to church. No one got sloppy drunk, no one danced inappropriately. My wedding was fun, my guests had a good time and didn't want to leave.

On the other side I have attended several Christian wedding where there was no drinking and DJ. Most guests (including the Christians) bolted after dessert. Most people didn't see the bouquet toss, or the garter toss and at one reception the bride was in tears because no one stuck around.

Food for thought.

Sometimes these posts remind me of that other site....Do what you want, people who know you and love you will not mind. Or hey, don't even have a reception....if you are having a church wedding, have the reception there..no alcohol is the norm in all but the catholic church right? My first wedding reception was at the church and it was actually fun. I am not having a traditional reception for my second wedding.

It is not so much drinking that is the problem but drinking in excess. Yes Jesus turned water into wine at a wedding but the point of that parable was not so that the guest would continue to be entertained but it was a means to exhibit to his diciples that he was divine in who he was and as such could perform miracles, even as menial as turning water into wine. As for where in the bible does it say Christians shouldn't drink. It doesn't, but Eph 5:18 does say "Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit" Just as it doesn't say we shouldn't gamble, what the Word of God does say however is that we should not do such in excess which is what we sinners always do as it is our nature to be sinful. Have what you want, how you want what is right for you and yours. If in planning your wedding day, you don't feel like Adam and Eve in the Garden after their encounter with the serpent,then I said well done b/c you haven't compromised 2 please man

Yes it was a divine thing to do and a miracle..but the point is that if it wasn't acceptable to drink at all then he wouldn't of done it.he would of been preaching against it.instead he turned the water into wine..he wouldn't contradict himself! it is acceptable to have some wine at a wedding if you are a christian..it is a celebration and wine was a tradition then and still is now. no one said you have to get drunk.as far as i am concerned if its good enough for Jesus at a wedding than its good enough for me.and if your guests are all a bunch of lushes and want to drink in excess than why would they be invited in the first place.

Sorry Ashley I am not trying to turn your question into a christian debate but i did fell i needed to respond to an answer that was posted..hope you find your solution..best of luck!

There was an episode of Four Weddings where a young bride had a very wholesome wedding including reception. They didn't have alcohol and I believe there were strong puritanical Christan overtones. Most of the guest were their church family so they understood the couples beliefs and yes it was a day wedding but they had all of the traditional elements of a wedding. I think they won, actually. She had the cutest milk and cookie bar and their first toast was with milk. I believe the bride was Anna and she was 19 if you want to check out how she pulled off an alcohol free wedding.

And their are plenty of fun Christan music that you wouldn't even realize was Christan unless you knew. I know my brother listens to rap, rock, and r&b Christan music and most of the time I don't even realize it.

You wedding should be fun for you, your FH, and your guest, while reflecting your relationship.

Typically people you associate with have a similar values as you and understand the choices you make.

@ heather h I didn't say Jesus said it was unacceptable or that it was forbidden to do, just that the reason he did it was not to improve the party or make it better but as a sign of his divinity. You and I and some others may know the story and the meaning behind it very well but there may be some who don't and I just wanted to make sure the meaning behind the story was clear. If I offended you in doing so, it was not my intention. I myself drink a glass of wine every now and again but people at weddings can be inclined to over imbibe and if the preference of the couple getting married is to not serve it at all that's their choice. I don't see where they said they didn't want to do it b/c it was forbidden, just that it was not the type of reception they wanted.

FH and I are in the same boat - half of my family are redcnecks and EXPECT alcohol and country music, and half of his expect there to be some sort of fast, grinding music. We don't really want too much of either one. We decided there would be bottles of NON-alcoholic wine - for the wedding party only, but have decided to do a compromise on the music. We are Christians, but we also enjoy listening to other songs that are not too sleezy or suggestive. We have a list of appropriate songs from different genres we like that we will play off of an MP3 Player during the reception. Another thing we have looked into was oldies - such as Crazy Little Thing Called Love by Queen.

Hope this helps a little and good luck!

This is such a good post, God bless you for it. It also is interesting to see everyones different viewpoints.

I am in a similar situation but with a few differents.

We are having very limited alchohol for the sit-down-dinner (so that does who do drink can have a glass and a half with their meal) we are toasting champagne and providing non-alchoholic beverages for those who do not drink (50%) of guests. We will be providing a large amount of non-alcoholic drinks, cocktails and soft drinks.

Music wise - we will have a christian ceremony and a "gospel hour" in the reception, we will then play some music that has been screened i.e. no swear words, no profanity, fun dance tunes and love songs. We will then play some cultural music

You can make it more interesting like yardie girl suggested with activities, photo booth, fun, games, wishing trees, candy buffets, exceptional food, activities etc. But i warn u to keep people happy the quality of all the other things has 2b high

I would also suggest having a jazz band as they can be very lively, whatever you do, dont give up.

I think to have a live instrumental band would be just fine, and if you have your reception earlier in the day, there will be less desire or expectation of alcohol.. I've honestly been to one wedding that served alcohol ever... if you know your friends and family and they aren't really drinkers, then you should know how to throw a party they can enjoy..

Nope. I had a jazz trio for my wedding, (the best in the business since I was IN the business at the time). It was boring.

Honestly, just look around at music. there are SOOOOooo many Christian artists and bands that you would not normally think are Christian becuase of how they sound, but they are.

Well my fiance and I are both Christians and we are having no alcohol, all Christian and instrumental music. Most of the music is from the swing era though. We decided to have a caricature for our reception and some other fun activities to keep our guests entertained. But most of all our music is Christian, and we even decided to have our favors reflect the Gospel of Jesus Christ. If you both are Christians and want to reflect that, then that's all that matters. People come to your wedding because they love you, not because its this huge party. We just recently had a white bible service where the church gave us advice for our marriage. There weren't a whole lot of ppl but if that was my wedding I would have loved it and cherished it because there was so much love there. The wedding is about you but most importantly its about Christ. Your wedding and marriage should reflect Him. So I say, don't worry about what people think, and do what's in your heart to do. Christ is our example. Whatever you do work at it with all your heart as if working for the Lord not for men.

Also AMEN to that Rowena...preech it

Hey how did it turn out!!??

I think no matter what you decide to do, just make sure to manage expectations with your guests. If you want an short reception with punch and finger food then put that on the invitation. As long as your guests know what they’re getting into, I doubt they’ll be disappointed.


At the end of the day, everyone has a different idea of what a fun party is. Do what makes you and your FH comfortable.

This thread is 8 years old.