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Emmillie
Just Said Yes September 2017

Reception or Vow Renewal

Emmillie, on May 21, 2019 at 11:57 PM Posted in Wedding Reception 0 10
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My husband and I wanted to get married and were tired of waiting until we graduated college to get married, so we got engaged and married in one month. We had a very small intimate wedding on the shore of one of the Great Lakes with 20 family members there. When we got married in 2017, the plan was to have a big reception when my husband and I both graduated from college in spring of 2020 to celebrate our wedding with our friends and family that we didn’t have at our ceremony and to celebrate us graduating from college.

Now I’m wondering if it is even appropriate to have a “reception” 2.5 years after the ceremony, or if we should do a “vow renewal”. However, 2.5 years seems very early in a marriage to do a vow renewal.

We didn’t have a reception earlier because we couldn’t afford one because we were both poor college students, and we always envisioned having a large wedding reception with around 200 family and friends.

What do all of you think, “Vow Renewal”, or “Reception”?

10 Comments

Latest activity by maryann, on May 22, 2019 at 9:19 AM
  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
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    I would do a vow renewal. I agree that 2.5 years later is awkwardly long to call it a reception.
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  • H
    Master July 2019
    Hannah ·
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    Agreed, it makes more sense for it to be a vow renewal instead of a reception.
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  • Eamsee
    Super June 2019
    Eamsee ·
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    Instead of calling it a "vow renewal" you could call it a "celebration of marriage". This way the awkward time frame of 2.5 years isn't really a factor. If anyone asks you to specify what exactly you are doing, you could describe it to them like you did here. "At the time we married, a traditional reception was not possible due to our studies and finances. As time progressed, we both realized that we really miss the idea of celebrating our marriage with our nearest and dearest. Now that our situation has changed for the better, we would like to have that reception and celebrate with our friends and family". Life is short and nothing is guaranteed. Personally speaking, I feel any celebration of love is a wonderful thing.

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  • Emmillie
    Just Said Yes September 2017
    Emmillie ·
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    I love this idea! But the next question is, what sort of reception events would be appropriate? And how much like a formal reception should it be?
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  • H
    Master July 2019
    Hannah ·
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    I love Eamsee's suggestion. And I would think you are free to do whatever traditions/events that you want to do. If you want to do a first dance, go for it. It's not like anyone is going to stand up and say you've danced together between 2017 and the reception. And if they do, that is probably a bigger problem with that individual. I don't think anyone will bat an eye about it not being right after the real ceremony.
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  • Mandi
    Master October 2020
    Mandi ·
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    A friend of a friend had a destination wedding and had a vow renewal 1 year later with a huge bridal party again. I kinda felt like it was super awkward.

    But if you're graduating and all that good stuff, I don't see an issue with a vow renewal. You survived college as a married couple. That's impressive.
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  • Eamsee
    Super June 2019
    Eamsee ·
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    I suppose it really just depends on the personal style of yourself and your husband. I say do whatever you want/what's in budget. It can mirror a traditional wedding reception exactly, only difference is that you are already legally married. I am not sure what your religious beliefs are, but you could have a full religious ceremony, or you can just exchange vows again, reaffirming your love and commitment, you could do a handfasting, a unity candle, anything really. Or you could skip the ceremony part and dive right on in to the party! The main thing that I personally believe would make it inappropriate is if you were trying to trick your guests and were lying about already being married. Since that's not the case, then there really isn't anything inappropriate in whatever you do.

    You could do something really formal with a sit down 7 course meal or you could have a BBQ buffet barn wedding with lawn games and everything in between. I recommend chatting with your husband and narrow down what type of event you want. Then start pricing out like venues and go from there.

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  • thisismrsb
    Expert June 2019
    thisismrsb ·
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    You can have a vow renewal ceremony as well as a reception.

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  • Tina
    Super August 2019
    Tina ·
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    When in Rome..do the vowel renewal. Lol. Congrats!!
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  • maryann
    Expert June 2019
    maryann ·
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    I would do the vow renewal... I don't think it would be awkward this way the family and friends that couldn't original be there, can witness your testament to continue to love each other and then celebrate with a reception/ graduation party....

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