Rehearsal dinner woes...

What do you suggest we do. I want to be good hosts especially because people are traveling and staying overnight. Would you be annoyed if the dinner was just pizza wings and beer? The venue is the Gilbertsville Farmhouse in South New Berlin NY. It's rustic but classy. The dinner will be in the old milking barn. If anyone knows places that have good food around there I'd appreciate suggestions too! We're hosting about 25 people.

You don't need to host everyone for the rehearsal dinner; technically, it's just the rehearsing people and their SO's.

If you do, pizza wings and beer is just fine. And pay for it yourself. Which probably should have been the plan from the start. Everyone will tell you not to spend promised money until you have the check in hand. And not to ask for money that has not been offered.

That's not really THAT far; but I'd suspect most people wouldn't come in the day before and stay, but stay the night of the wedding so they don't have to drive after partying.

What happened with your mom?

Pizza, wings, and beer is fine. It doesn't have to be anything fancy.

@celia we are paying for it ourselves now that my mother has backed out. I just want to know whether it makes more sense to have a traditional sit down dinner or go cheaper and have pizza, wings, etc. The 25 people include us, the parents, my aunt and uncle who are coming the day before from PA, my sister, the bridal party and their SOs and the officiant and her date.

@jenna she's paid for the whole wedding so while I'm annoyed she waited til now to tell me she's not paying I totally understand and I'm thankful for what she has paid for. That's why I'm saying we're going to pay for the RD. Im just trying to be a good host and not spend our entire honeymoon savings.

You still don't need to host them. And if you do, pizza and beer is just fine. The next night is the 'do' and that's plenty!

Honestly, if she's footing the bill for the whole wedding? She has every right to pull out of this event. Should she have told you sooner? Sure, but many people here are paying for their entire wedding. It doesn't look like just a disaster if you think of it that way...

Go with the pizza and beer. As a guest, I'd be totally okay with that. Save as much of your honeymoon fund as you can.

You don't need to host everyone traveling. Just those in your wedding and parents. Pizza and drinks is totally fine. Also, if you are using all of your savings for your honeymoon (a vacation), your priorities are already in the wrong place.

Our guests are traveling 10 hours and for our rehearsal dinner we're doing pizza! People love pizza.

RD We are planning to go to a little restaurant rented out the place ( it's that small)the main option is actually different pizzas but for those who dislike pizza pasta will be another choice and some apps. As for drinks beer and wine are the options.

She's paying for the whole wedding? Wow your lucky!

I'm going to be very blunt and honest with you, from the start I would have put money away for the rehearsal dinner knowing my mom was paying for my wedding. No matter if she said she was paying for the rehearsal or not I would have said I'm paying for one or the other.

With that being said, to be a good host, I think you should take them out to a restaurant. I get you want to save some money but these people are all coming for you and some standing by yout side, you shouldn't be saying I'll take the cheaper way out. Beer, pizza, and wings aren't bad if your hosting football at the house but this is a special day and you have special guest, treat them as such

I think she was saying that she has a honeymoon savings, not that she was spending her savings on a honeymoon lol

Do what you can do - I think people would be happy to be hosted, it doesn't have to be fancy :-) Though I might lean toward wraps and sandwiches over pizza, but that's just me. I know most people love pizza!

Pizza wings beer and maybe wine is perfect. As is chipotle. Check with the hotel see if there a meeting room you can rent at a low fee. Some brides on here have said the hotel didn't charge them for a room for the rehearsal

@katelina thank you...I was going to just ignore that comment about my priorities but you are correct. We have a separate acct for our honeymoon which we aren't taking right away anyway. I would rather host properly than take a honeymoon. @jessica that's a good idea. We're lucky because our venue is an old farm with a house, barn and milking barn so we have free reign to have the dinner in any of those places for free. I just wanted to find a consensus on what food to serve :-)

I think the pizza idea is fine

I totally disagree with GeeQT. If I were in your bridal party I would rather have a casual, low key event prior to a loooooong ass day. A free meal and free drinks always make me feel special and appreciated, regardless if it's pizza and beer or steak and champagne. Save lavishing your guests for the wedding.

There is nothing, as far as I'm concerned, that says a rehearsal dinner needs to be a formal affair. I think pizza, wings, beer, and wine sounds awesome. I have been to rehearsal dinners at buffets, restaurants, country clubs, VFW halls, and pubs. Your guests will appreciate a meal regardless of what it is! All I will add is to make sure you have enough food. Pizza and wings are the type of food that people seriously load up on. =)

For the rehearsal dinner I think any type of food goes (within reason) and you can buy a few cases of beer and bottles of wine. For 25 people, I feel like you could properly host a RH for less than 500 (if you already have a rental space)

Thank you to everyone for your input! I really appreciate it! I thought I really needed to go all out and that FH was just being cheap. We've decided to call around and see what pizza place would be best. We're also going to do salad and some other sides like mozz sticks or something.