Role for a pre-teen?

I'd just make her one of the ushers as well. Guest book attendant is a shitty "job" and people can figure out the guest book on their own.

Can she do a reading? Read a poem or something? My godson is 11, he is very excited to do a reading!

Oh wait just read the her not being able to stand up there. Sorry! We are asking our moms to bring up the holy water or whatever during our church ceremony, maybe she could do something like that during the ceremony? Really though, if it were my family like if I was on your side and I saw one little girl from their family there, I would totally understand (or not even notice).

Just let her come, no job needed. We let family members over the age of 13 attend so that DH nieces could come but not the younger nieces since we didn't want kids and there are a lot of them. No other guest got to bring kids and we got no push back

@lindsey I thought so too, she'd be so bored! Unless we do something very crafty like a thumbprint tree (she'd be all over that, very artsy type), I rather not do that to her

@Holly Part of why I don't think she could handle standing up is she is very, very shy

ETA @Holly it is also to appease his mother, if we're firm with the no kids policy but give her a job, otherwise FMIL is pushing to invite all the kids of their friends.

Do she likes to sing, do a special dance or a speech? If not put her on child care for your flower girl and ring barer

@colombiana_ac Then that wouldn't be fair to my cousins who have children if the same age and younger, so either they only got to bring one kid or none, i rather they bring none cause their daughter is a brat.

If you do give her a responsibility, I love the idea of being an usher. Does something need to be handed out after the ceremony? Bubbles?

I have seen so many personal items get left behind in the church, not only after formals but after the ceremony. Items left in the pews and in the dressing rooms. If she's crafty, ask if she would like to make a "Left Behind" sign to be put on a tote. She can double check all the church pews, her parents can bring the tote to the reception, and have the DJ make an announcement.

Cameras, purses, jewelry, accessories, etc ... it's amazing. When the DJ makes the announcement, the guests are checking themselves and patting themselves and then it's like someone called "BINGO!" and they run up to the tote and grab their camera or scarf ...

Have her be your assistant? I wasn't in my sister's wedding but I helped decorate, talk to my niece who got really nervous right before she was supposed to walk down the aisle, fetched things for the bride. Whatever little odd jobs that came up.

@Kathleen I like it! Thanks! I think usher may be the way to go with her too

Maybe she can help watch the younger kids at the reception. When I was the age my aunt paid me to keep an eye on her kids at her reception. It helped me feel important and included.