Save the date replies

You wouldn't, RSVPs do not go on STDs. Anyone who gets an STD now should also receive an invitation. Your wedding is over a year away, life events happen and it's unreasonable to expect someone to decide now if they're unable to attend. What if at the moment they're struggling financially and think they can't make it, but then get a lucrative job in 6 months and can?

You don’t. Guests don’t rsvp to the save the date and once the save the date is sent, an invitation must be sent to those people. You need to finalize the guest list before you look for a venue with your ride or die must have guests and do not invite anyone who is there only out of obligation to please others whom you don’t care about. It’s considered highly impolite to have a B list of “the original people said no so we’re inviting others instead”. People know that they are requested to be seat fillers and would prefer to not be invited in that situation.


Save the dates are sent via word of mouth/phone call/magnet at 6-12 months before the weddings. No one can begin to commit anything before that time. Invitations are sent 6-8 weeks before standard so that guests don’t lose and forget the information. Employers don’t finalize schedules before 4 weeks, which is when invitation rsvps are due. So the standard timeline exists for reason.

Save the dates are exactly that. Guests do not rsvp to these. They rsvp to invitations. We had to chase about 20% of guests for their rsvp 4 weeks prior to our date.