Seating Chart... Why? What are the pros?

I'm not sure it's a growing trend as much as a typical thing at a semi-formal or more formal wedding. Every wedding (besides 1) I've been to in the last 15 years has had a seating chart. I personally hate weddings without them, especially if you're part of a big group and you have to awkwardly split up into tables or you are an out of town guest or coworker so you don't know other guests then you randomly just sit down. I think the reception seating really sets the tone for how fun overall the reception will be. We had all our guests on our seating chart that RSVPed "yes" and I checked 10+ times to confirm that.

Two main advantages: First is that Grandma doesn't arrive to find the only seat available is with the groom's fraternity brothers. You can seat people with others that they know, or at least others that they are possibly compatible with.

The other is that you need more seating if you don't assign seats. You don't want the family of six to arrive and find that there is one seat available at each of six tables. So without a seating chart, you have to make sure that there are enough seats so that there will be space at at least one table for your largest party.

You don't have to assign actual seats. But at least assigning people to tables is helpful, unless the reception is so informal (cake and punch, or cocktail party) that people aren't going to stay seated for much of the time.

For us, it's making sure that my mom is far away from my stepmom and my dad. We're also sitting my mom's trouble sister with them so they're all out of the way. I think honestly it's something for the older folks that like knowing where they're sitting, and it also kind of brings order to your chaos? Just make sure your non declined guests are all accounted for!

Having a plated dinner where the guest chose their meal is the only reason I have heard of. Granted, I've also never been to one where there was a seating chart.

I mean, your experience actually sounds like a fluke/a mistake on the couple's part.

Seating charts (or escort cards for table assignments) are kind of a necessity for weddings that have any more than, like, 20-30 people. If there's not at least assigned tables then chaos typically ensues--I've been to two weddings like this and both had people taking chairs from other tables and adding them to others so they could sit with a massive group of friends/family. This also left a good amount of tables with barely anyone at them (usually just grandparents). Additionally, people with any kind of disabilities, or older people that walker slower, are typically put at a disadvantage in that situation.

Are you asking why assigned seats/assigned tables is a good idea? Or are you just asking why people have display charts to denote seats?

So the main reason is it’s easier for your guests and will generally save you money. If you don’t have a seating chart you will need more tables/chairs/place settings than people because people don’t nicely place themselves in groups of 8 or 10 on their own. Think about at the movies before they did assigned seating, people would leave a seat open between if they didn’t know that person so you would have to ask people to scoot down or the theater wouldn’t fill to capacity. The same thing happens at weddings. I’m sorry you had an experience where the host had bad etiquette and didn’t list you, but I would definitely recommend assigned tables for a wedding.

I did a seating chart to keep my FH parents separated. TBH that is the only reason I did one at all.

Seating charts have always been a thing where I'm from, definitely not a trend, especially if it's a large wedding. Basically it's to let people know which table to sit at. The purpose of them is to avoid confusion about where people are supposed to sit.


You should have definitely been included in it even if it was just "and guest" after your FH's name.
The only wedding I went to that didn't have a seating chart created some drama and disorganization bc the grooms mother felt her side of the family should have the best seats while we, the bride's family who all came from out of town, should have the tables in the back by the kitchen. We spent way too much time "discussing " where to sit and it created a bad vibe for the night.

It just makes it easier for everyone to get a seat. If you didn’t have one people who have to actually scramble to find a seat for them and their party.

Agree with everyone else on the very practical reasons for seating charts (and you don't have to assign *seats*, but you should assign *tables*). And that it's not a trend, growing or otherwise. It's a long-established practice at large gatherings that are at least semi-formal. There are of course regional customs that don't include them, but it's far from new or a trend.

As for your unfortunate experience, I hardly think you can blame that on the existence of a seating chart; that was just poor hosting. Having a seating chart can actually eliminate the very problem you describe (guests who don't know anyway don't know where to sit). Of course, this is ALSO a strong argument for doing away with head tables that separate couples, but that's another thread.

Definitely a growing trend. Or one that is more noticable with the growth of social media.
I've officially been to 2 weddings with seating charts. So I'm no expert.
Basically both of the weddings I have been to have been very large. So it helps with space.Our venue has a 240 capacity. We invited a little over that, and expect around 200 people. The pros for us are that we can take down extra tables. And we will have more space.
The cons. I have to chase down at least 3 guests and ask who in their party is coming. I have one guy bringing a guest. I'm cool with anyone bringing a plus one, but imma need a name to put on that seating chart.

You will need and then have unused seating. People will spread out and then groups will have to split up.
We’re having a smaller wedding of 70 and still doing a seating chart.

Just do table assignments. My caterer said things get very messy if you do a free for all

I'm trying to see too sis!! I didn't do rsvps. So im like I don't know.

View Quoted Comment Oh man. Our head table is near the kitchen...


That being said, I can and guest the seating chart? I'm very plus one friendly and have a friend coming who said he was bringing a guest. But doesnt know who, so I can just put him under W as Joe Whatshisname + Guest?

View Quoted Comment

Yes, definitely. If you don't know the name of the guest it's fine to put "Joe Schmoe + Guest, table X" on the escort card. Obviously any names you do know should go on there like "Joe Schmoe + Jane Doe, table X". As long as everyone is accounted for it's fine.

I would be frustrated if I went to a wedding without a seating chart. I like having them because then I don't have to worry about being in someone more important's seat. I will be assigning tables, not seats. That will allow people to know where to sit without picking individual seats. We also don't have space for extra tables so we kind of have to.

Not assigning tables you run the risk of the free for all and Grandma getting mad she isn't closer to the couple. I would say, if someone decides to bring an extra person who didn't RSVP (happened at my brother's wedding) it gets awkward. But then again, I don't care at that point. It's their fault for not paying attention to the invite.

I live in Texas and the vast majority of the weddings I have been to do not have seating charts. It's mass chaos without them. Couples will try to sit with a chair in between them and the next couple so then you end up with single chairs at random tables and other couples have to split up or ask people to move over. Our wedding isn't super formal but it's nicer than a lot of the ones I've been to. In our circle, it's not taboo to have BBQ, styrofoam, and BYOB. We did NOT want to do that so we'll have the open bar, place settings, nicer food buffet, etc. We're doing table assignments, not seating assignments. That way, nobody will be wandering around looking for a seats together and we can also try to pair guests that will socialize with one another.

Seating charts are absolutely necessary if you have meal choices. Even if you don’t pick the seat you should designate to a table so that you can organize. If you do open seating you will need about 10% more tables and chairs because the crowds will not even out perfectly and you will need overflow. Don’t stress! They will be there for an hour and a half tops!

I have never been to a wedding that had one. We chose to not do one because 1. all our guests are adults 2. our wedding was very casual 3. the food was a buffet and 4. we had a small guests list where pretty much everyone knew everyone. We did not have any problems with someone not having a seat, sitting with people they didn't know or any couples not being able to be next to each other. Some feel they are necessary, I am just not one of them.