Semi-Destination Wedding.. is a Monday ceremony too weird?

It's your wedding and you get to say what goes. The people that want to make it will make it. Yes more people might miss it but if it doesn't bother you, go for it!

My reason for leaning towards a Monday:

Saturdays and Sundays on the Outer Banks are "turn days" - aka, the day weekly rental homes turn over and the previous renters leave and the new renters come in. This makes a normal Saturday or Sunday wedding really awkward (not to mention a nightmare, traffic wise), as most of our closest family have expressed plans to rent houses and make a week's vacation at the beach of it.

Most hotels in the Outer Banks are also fairly strict with their in season reservation policies. If you want to stay a Friday or Saturday night, you have to book for the ENTIRE weekend - whereas sunday-thursday, you can book a single night with no issue.

And my final reasoning.... I'm a cosmetologist. Most of my friends are cosmetologists. Our weekends are Sunday-Monday or Monday-Tuesday. A weekend wedding would pretty much all but guarantee many of them wouldn't be able to attend.

So yea.. thats my logic. Am I being unrealistic in thinking in this situation, a Monday wedding just makes the most sense?

I mean, you can do whatever you want. For most people though, this might not work. If I have to go for a 5 hour trip I am taking 2-3 days. I wouldn't be able to do that because Id have to take multiple vacation days and personally unless you're a really close relative...I am not using my few vacation days to travel for a wedding.

If many of your guests have expressed plans to make a vacation out of it, a Monday wedding may work in your situation.

If you do decide to do a Monday, I would make sure I wouldn't be upset if a handful of people said that they couldn't make it. As it may be hard for people to go to a Monday wedding. Saying that, those who are able to make it, will be there.

I think you have good reasons for a Monday wedding.

I'm in a wedding destination location, too. People check in on the weekend, go to the courthouse for the license on Monday (no waiting period for non-residents of FL), and I marry them Monday or Tuesday evening! Then they have the rest of the week as their honeymoon.

If your guest are planning on making a week vacation out of it, then I think Monday would be perfect. Like someone else on WW told me about my destination wedding, those who can and want to be to be there will make it no matter when and where.

@Niki, I agree - go with what works for your crew!

With that said, have you considered changing your date to the off season? You may be able to avoid a lot of the constraints of the turn days and the rentals are usually a 1/3 of the peak season cost. I've been going to the Outer Banks for years and now wait until Labor Day when the prices drop. The weather is a little cooler too and more tolerable for an outdoor event. Just a suggestion...

I'm in a similar situation with the semi-DW, and a lot of people were initially excited about making a vacation out of the wedding, but a few are now planning to only come for the weekend. Including my sister/MOH, but that's another story ;-) You may end up with quite a few more dropping out if they're facing peak-season, week-long rental fees. I've been surprised how much people have changed their plans and we're still a year out, so I figured I'd share for what it's worth.

Monday is tough. If your family expressed that they are making a vacation out of it, then it's a lot better. But have you considered a Thursday? As a guest, I would be a little bit more okay with a Thursday because it would be leading into a weekend instead of a work week.

But you know your crew and if it's a vacation for everyone, then go for it!

Hi fellow cosmetologist!

We did consider it, but my MoH/sister and one of my bridemaids are all teachers, so unfortunately thats a no go. My sister just had a baby, so taking time off once she comes back to work teaching isn't going to be possible for her during the **** school year.

We had wanted to do it earlier in June, but for who knows what reason schools aren't scheduled to let out until June 22nd next year. We normally visit father's day week along with my extended family (aunts/uncles, siblings, cousins - everyone rents homes around corolla and duck), but everyone is pushing it back a week for that reason.

Thanks for the input, all - and hi to another fellow cosmo - you feel my pain on the saturday thing

I totally expect and understand that some folks wont be able to attend - thats something I had in mind when picking a spot so far away in the first place. We figured that our families are so spread out in the first place (MA, NH, MD, CO, NC) that numerous people would need to travel regardless - may as well hold it in some place actually worth travelling to, which our current city... is not.

You know your guests best. Personally for me, unless it was a VERY close family member or a best friend, I wouldn't likely make a Monday destination wedding.

It's your wedding. You get to set the date. As long as you're prepared for declines (and you may get quite a few) and don't it personally, then have your wedding on a Monday (just not Monday morning -- the ickiest time of the week, lol). You already know you've got your close family members and your cosmetologist friends coming, so that's good news (and I totally get the cosmetologist weekend. My mom owned a hair salon for years. Saturday was her busiest day. Her weekends were Sunday and Monday).

As long as you won't be hurt when people decline, go for it-- you make your plans, they'll make theirs. If, on the other hand, you think you'll be sad, lonely, and resentful, then make other plans.

While I totally get your reasons, I probably would not come if I had a year-long job (as it is, I'm a teacher and I don't work in June, so I'd be there). If this was during the school year, I would have to take two days off, which is very difficult because we only get 10 during the school year for any doctor visits, sick days, etc.

Hi Niki. I would totally attend a wedding on a Monday. Especially if it's a semi-regular destination wedding. I'm in a similar boat. We're getting married on Florida's Gulf Coast and we are renting a beach house as well. That's once reason why we're getting married on Sunday. Turn over day is Saturday. Which gives us time to decorate and most of my guests will come in on Saturday (they will be staying at a hotel) and leave on Monday.

What we say doesn't matter in the least. It is the gut honest feedback you get from your VIPs that really counts.

Ask them for HONEST feedback. Don't say "you would come to my wedding on a Monday on the OBX, right?" Say, "OK - be brutally honest here. If I chose to get married on a Monday in the OBX, would you attend, would you be able to attend?"

The line that makes me ragey in this stuff is, "The people that want to make it will make it." NO they won't. They want to come quite badly but just can't for one reason or another.

Also - if you do choose the monday route you need to be super gracious about any declines you receive because you are asking for people to travel, spend a lot of money on accomodations, and use their vacation time.

It is your VIPs opinions that really count, not ours.