She asked me to be a bridesmaid one month away from ceremony

A woman that I’ve known from university through passing in the library invited me to become a bridesmaid in her vow renewal. I’ve had conversations with her and know her husband and they know my husband. However, I’m not very close to her. Back in May, she wanted my husband and me to celebrate her graduation with her and her husband at their home. It was also the second time I had met her outside of school. She didn’t invite us to her graduation ceremony because she told me that she had limited tickets.


So, a week ago she called and told me that she is having a vow renewal/graduation party and wanted me to be a bridesmaid. Without thought, I accepted. I met with her over the weekend and realized that she had been planning this event for some time with the other bridesmaids and her husband. I felt out of the loop. She said her best friend’s mom is back in Kenya getting the dresses and other attire made. I don’t know how the dresses look since she doesn’t have a picture and going off of her bestfriend’s design that isn’t complete. The ceremony is August 14th. She even asked if my husband could miss the ceremony so he could pick up the food for the wedding which is an hour away. Also, she wanted me to stay with the other bridesmaids after the reception and let my husband go home alone. Her husband didn’t know that my husband would be attending. Also, she asked if I could do her makeup in addition to my own. Not only that, but she would like for me to prepare enough beef for 80 people alongside the chicken that would be catered. Her husband told me she’s stressed and all of this is her idea. So, he left the planning to her and the women. I really do not like this at all, how do I let her know that I want to leave her bridal party?