Should i call it off? Not sure where to turn.

I have to agree with everyone else. You don't have to leave him to call off the wedding, call it off or postpone it and sit down with individual and couple's therapy. To me, hearing my SO is telling other people he's scared and not ready would be a HUGE red flag. He needs to communicate how he's feeling with you, not his friends. If he can't do that, no matter how much you love him, it's going to hurt you in the long run and your relationship will become exhausting and toxic, maybe to the both of you, if you two don't learn how to communicate with each other. I know it's really difficult and scary, but you have to do what's best for YOU in the long run, even if it means making difficult decisions.

My suggestion is like many others. Seek counseling! That is not a bad or taboo thing! I have a friend who is the WORST communicator, and EVERYONE in our circle was having issues with her because she didn't know how to communicate. She started going through counseling, and she was finally able to talk through some problems. It helped her figure out who her true friends were and who her toxic friends were, but most importantly it helped her to find out not only what she wanted from friendship, but also what she has to put into friendship. I bring her up as a point because your fiance could be similar to her.

If you are having doubts now, get help ASAP! Talk to FH openly honestly about your issues, and let him know you want to make it work, and suggest marriage counseling (a lot of people do it before their wedding especially if either party is having cold feet)

If you are still having doubts after a few session, postpone the wedding (sooner rather than later). If you guys have put down some deposits you maybe able to move them to a later date.

If you are still having doubts later, that is the time to reevaluate the relationship, and possibly call off the wedding.

I would also like to add if he is not willing to do this with you now, it may show just how invested he is in making the relationship work! It is important to know that he is equally as willing to make the relationship work.

Please do what you need to do! Listen to your heart! Do not let anyone else's feelings bout you and FH dictate the path of your relationship! Know you WW sisters are with you! I wish you the best of luck with this issue! Please let us know an update!

I am so sorry to hear about that, it has to be confusing and upsetting to go through all that uncertainty. I do agree with the PPs and think you need to postpone and soul search. Postponing a wedding is easier than a marriage, and counseling for you guys may help reveal a lot

Good luck!

I second this so much. As badly as it hurts and as much as it sucks, with as much doubt as is in your relationship right now, if you really truly want to have a lasting marriage, the two of you need to figure this all out before getting married. Even if you simply say you are moving the date farther out, that's a smarter move than going forward with someone who you can't be sure of his real feelings on the matter

First of all wether he meant the comments or not you should at last postpone your wedding. Your next step is counseling. I would also say better a failed engagement then a failed marriage. I know that may sound harsh but honestly a failed engagement is monetarily easier than a divorce. Either situation will be difficult emotionally but others have survived and so will you if this is the route that you ultimately take.

You need to keep your relationship private. Privacy is the key! Your friends and family do not need to be getting involved in your relationship. With let being said I would have a talk with your fiancé and private and go from there. If you feel like you to need to postpone it that's up to you to.