Should i give a std to my father?

I just realized the title sounds ridiculous lol

View Quoted Comment I thought the same Thing! Lol
I would not send him one. Take time to decide what you want to do down the road. You can’t take the STD back. You can always send him an invite close to your date.

View Quoted Comment Yes I was dying when I saw the title. I sent a screenshot to FH who would have been super confused if I hadn’t told him what std is in wedding lingo. 😂


But I agree with Shannon! It’s best to wait and see how your relationship is closer to the wedding. You can’t undo a save the date.

View Quoted Comment 🤣 I, too, got a good laugh from the title. STD is too ambiguous of an acronym sometimes and this is an ideal example!



I would say hold off on sending a Save the Date. You can't easily un-invite someone and you should see what your relationship looks like closer to the wedding. If your dad is not speaking to any other member of the family right now then he will not know they have received theirs. If you choose to invite him later on then he also won't know his was sent late.

I always get a good chuckle out of save the date abbreviations 😂

I agree with everyone else that you should hold off. Hopefully with a year until the wedding he'll turn his behavior around, but if he doesn't then it'll be a major ordeal to uninvite him vs just not invite him in the first place. Maybe not sending him a save the date would even be a bit of a wake-up call to him to shape up.

If he’s toxic and you aren’t on speaking terms, don’t send anything. Save your money by calling/emailing everyone with the information if price is a concern. Just because he’s related doesn’t earn him the right to share in your important life moments if he will not respect you. Your mental health is more important.

I definitely won't send him one. You're mental health and well being is definitely more important.

Don't send the STD. If things do improve over the next year then you can invite him later. I hope your health improves, best wishes to you.

No one NEEDS a save the date . But anyone who gets one should be invited. Skipping the save the date doesn’t mean you can’t invite him when the time comes ! That’s a decision you can make later.


TOTALLY different scenario but same basic concept — I was drifting from a friend when we were sending save the dates. I didn’t send her one, but I kept her on my guestlist numbers wise. I was feeling like the friendship was one sided so I set a boundary for myself and said if she didn’t reach out to me to hang out/check in/see how I was before it was time to send invites, that was it, and not the kind of person I need to accommodate. (Spoiler— she did not! So I was glad I didn’t give her a save the date and feel obligated to invite her to my wedding. [she was offended and not in my life anymore, lol, but , her loss!])

View Quoted Comment Prime example of why you should never shorten save the dates to STD

View Quoted Comment Thank you cause I was going to say something lol I wish you the best but do what makes you happy.

View Quoted Comment I’m glad you said this because I originally thought it meant sexually transmitted disease. 😂. No but really This really sounds like a heartbreaking situation. Is there anyway that you can talk to him? I would probably be inclined to send him one anyway but before doing so maybe have a thoughtful exchange. I’m wondering if him not being invited would make things worse? But then again maybe inviting him would heal the rift to some extent.

View Quoted Comment

Yeah that's my concern. Some of my siblings are still talking to him so he will know that I intentionally didn't send him one. I honestly can not talk to him right now. Tensions are too high. I know that if we spoke it would be too stressful on me and we would argue. It really is a heartbreaking situation our family is in. We all used to be so close. Not sending him a save the date will hurt him, but I feel like if I send him one it's sending the wrong message. I'm not on good terms with him and I don't condone his actions. This is so hard.

View Quoted Comment Maybe sending it will send the message that you would like to be on good terms. It could open the door.

I had a near heart attack when I saw the title, then started laughing. But anyway, you don't have to invite him if you don't want him at your wedding. It's your choice and yours alone.