Sister is getting married on the exact date of my 1 year wedding anniversary

Wow that’s rough, I’m so sorry! I’m not sure this will help but I do understand how you feel. It SHOULD be a two way street with sisters. Mine got engaged after me and raced to get married before me and took a bunch of my ideas and had very little sympathy for me when my wedding got pushed back so to covid. She even went as far as to tell me my new date didn’t really work for her and I said too bad. It sucks and it has very seriously strained our relationship. However this pans out for you both, this is not your fault and frankly she’s being exceedingly selfish. We all get excited and we all want the spotlight on our day but knowing what she clearly knows about your day and your plans this is on her.

I don't blame you for feeling the way you do. You feel that way and its VALID. I understand being overshadowed or having your thunder taken away by your sister. My sister decided to have her second wedding on my 40th bday weekend. She had the WHOLE year and she picked MY 40th bday weekend. I was also MOH so basically ZERO attention was paid to me bc I was busy helping her with her wedding. That's only one example.

Go on your vacation with your family and YOU DO YOU. Its not your fault that she planned it this way. People will always judge, so YOU need to be happy with your decision. I think if you cancelled and went to her wedding you would end up bitter about it eventually. You already had to cancel plans due to Covid. Id say you sacrificed enough! Good Luck!

I am in the same boat as far as my sister planning her wedding on my anniversary. My husband and I have plans to go out of country (it's our 5 year) and have also talked about doing a vow renewal. My sister initially wanted her wedding at our house. She had told me she was only having 1 person stand in her wedding (her best friend). She formally asked her to be her maid of honor and it was posted on social media. I randomly got a group message from my sister to me, our other sister and mom informing me she had booked her date at a venue and I was the only one who hasn't got my dress yet. I responded with I wasn't aware I was in the wedding last we talked you had told me you were just having 1 person. My husband and I are going to be celebrating our milestone anniversary so I won't be around the week of to help with any wedding things or be at rehearsal or rehearsal dinner. I expected a that's ok as long as you can be there that day but I got omg I can't believe you would say that. You're gonna go on vacation instead of going to your own sisters wedding. And a lot more grief and hurtful words not just from her but also my mom and other sister.


I can't believe that anyone would finalize a date without making sure your wedding party can attend that day. We are going on our planned trip and celebrating our 5years because that is a big deal to us. If that means I'm not part of my sisters wedding than so be it. It stinks that people have unrealistic expectations and just expect everyone to be ok with it.