So I'm sure this wouldn't be an issue if it weren't my sister, it's probably just sibling drama, but I just wanted to vent and see if anyone has similar issues with family.
My wedding venue is a mansion with a beautiful garden for the ceremony and cocktail hour. Originally we weren't going to invite kids since it's an evening event. We aren't even having a flower girl or ring barer. My sister has 2 kids now (under 5) and she was very adamant that her kids be in attendance. Basically after a couple weeks of arguing we gave in since my parents also instead. Then by allowing her kids, it brought in drama with cousins on my side who wanted to bring their kids, and we couldn't really say "wedding party kids or kids above 12," so long story short we now have a list of 54 kids split between my side and my FHs side which has added a substantial cost since we are hiring baby sitters (picked by the parents) and are having to cater to a kids menu and activities for them. We weren't thrilled but that's all in the past since its literally been about 2 years since we gave in. Now that we sent out invites and budgeted the extra cost which is about $4000 when we add in the 3 babysitters and activities booked, she called my mom today who then let me know that she and her husband will be coming solo and they want it to be a romantic weekend away from the kids who will be staying with his parents. I told my mom I was very upset and how she could have thought of this 2 years ago when she knew all along we were set on an black tie evening event.
Long story short, my FH and I who are paying about 75% of the wedding are stuck paying an extra $4000 for a ton of kids. Our guest count is 250 invited, and I expect some to not want to bring their kids, but I still do expect a good amount of my cousins to bring their kids since they were on my sisters side and tagged on to her drama.
I know there is nothing we can do now but wait for RSVPs and I'm not going to un-invite or make the parents with kids feel unwelcome, it just is very irritating that the one person we did it for is now changing her mind and doesn't seem to understand why we are very annoyed with her. She texted me a very brief apology and that her reasoning was that her in-laws just recently offered to take the kids... Her in-laws live 1 hour from them and they drive into the city monthly to see the kids, I highly doubt they didn't offer to babysit when we set a date or that they aren't close enough that they cant ask for one weekend away. Sisters...
