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EmAbrams
Devoted August 2019

So annoyed with my sister- rant

EmAbrams, on October 28, 2019 at 4:33 PM Posted in Community Conversations 0 12
My husband and I got married on Aug 31, this year. For both of us this is marriage number two so we did have a slightly non-traditional wedding. We had a lot of friends helping and used family for venders etc. I live in Southern California and my sister is a professional photographer located in the upper peninsula in Michigan. I flew her in, paid for all her expenses while she was here and surprised her with a gift certificate to the local day spa as a thank you that arrived in the mail shortly after she returned home tip included! During our wedding she made several comments such as "don't even think about rushing me after the wedding" and "I'll edit these photos when I get to them." I let those comments slide because I didn't want to argue at the wedding and didn't even image she might be serious. Prior to the wedding she never once said this project wouldn't be a priority. So here we are almost two full months after the wedding and I still have only seen a handful of pictures. Yesterday she text me- not wedding related- to let me know she received stitches in her foot due to an accident at home. She told me she has really enjoyed the downtime since she can't walk on her foot. She told me how she has been able to binge watch T.V, work on sewing projects etc. I finally decided to ask her if she is using the "downtime" for editing my pictures and she said "yeah, yeah I will get to them when I get to them" Why the flip can't she just get them done and get them off of her plate?! (which I know is very full, running a business, actually two, she is a baker as well, plus caring for her hubby and three kids) GGGRRRRR I just want my wedding photos. I am super annoyed and just wanted to Vent just.........UGH.

12 Comments

Latest activity by Sara, on October 28, 2019 at 9:39 PM
  • Sarah
    Master September 2019
    Sarah ·
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    Most photographers we looked at were between 6-12 weeks for delivery timeline, so while I think it’s easy to be annoyed that your sister doesn’t seem to be making your photos a priority, she’s also not even past what most professionals give for a timeline. Hopefully she’ll get them to you soon!
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  • Denise
    Devoted May 2019
    Denise ·
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    Did she volunteer to shoot your wedding or did you ask her to do it?
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  • L
    Lady ·
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    And you didn't pay her. Yes you paid her expenses, which was nice, but I can understand why your wedding woudln't be at the top of her list. And if you didn't have a contract, then there's not much you can do unfortunately.

    Also, Sarah is totally right that shes' still well within the limits most photographer give.

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  • Alyssa
    Super December 2021
    Alyssa ·
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    This is the problem with hiring family. Too late to go back now, but if you don’t get things in a timely manner you can always threaten to leave her a bad review and see if that straightens her out.
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  • EmAbrams
    Devoted August 2019
    EmAbrams ·
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    Yes I get that. I was just hoping for more than 3-4 photos as a sneak peak Smiley sad

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  • EmAbrams
    Devoted August 2019
    EmAbrams ·
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    When I called her to inform her of the engagement she asked if I planned on using her. I told her only if she was offering and we came to the agreement that I would pay her plane ticket and she would take care of the rest. Once she got here and I picked her up from the airport I didn't let her pay for anything.

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  • EmAbrams
    Devoted August 2019
    EmAbrams ·
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    I get that, I was honestly just looking for a safe place to vent. I am not a big complainer but I have read countless rant/vents posts so I thought I would toss one out there lol

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  • EmAbrams
    Devoted August 2019
    EmAbrams ·
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    I would never do that to her I just wanted to air my frustrations. She really is extremely talented I would never want to hurt her livelihood.

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  • Alyssa
    Super December 2021
    Alyssa ·
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    Maybe just the threat or push may be what gets her to quit being rude about your situation though.
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  • EmAbrams
    Devoted August 2019
    EmAbrams ·
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    Very true, very true. I may take that idea and run with it Smiley smile

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  • Denise
    Devoted May 2019
    Denise ·
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    I can appreciate you’re eager to get your pictures. Absolutely vent to strangers about that. But your sister worked at your wedding. Is it possible she spent the day feeling more like a vendor than your sister? Maybe approach the situation from a place of empathy than threatening to leave her a bad review. (When someone has something you want, that’s rarely a good tact.)
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  • Sara
    Expert February 2020
    Sara ·
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    This. I wouldn't threaten her with a bad review. Maybe if you rave about and praise the sneak peek photos she did give you, it will make her want to give you more.

    Plus, she's your sister. You'll get them when you get them.

    At least you didn't have to pay thousands for a photographer you don't even know..or one who showed up late, double booked, was pushy and in the way..or any of the other various horror stories I've read on here.
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